Priesthood? Being called? Me?

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GandalfTheWhite

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Hi!

I don’t know where to start with this because I’ve never revealed it to anyone else. Basically, I think I MIGHT be called to priesthood but I have doubts - actually DOUBTS.

I think I should start this way. I’m 21 years old and I’m a craddle Catholic. I went to church every Sunday, went to confession etc. during my younger years, however I was doing it basically because my mom wanted me to do it and I kinda felt obligated to follow her. Don’t get me wrong, I believed in the Trinity and the ‘basic stuff’ etc., but that’s probably where my faith ended - I didn’t really care much (nor understood). Two years ago I moved to the UK to study politics. I stopped living like a catholic but during this academic year something happened and I fully returned to the Church. I got confirmed this year and I love God and I love his Church very much. I’m an orthodox Catholic who is becomming more and more traditinalist and conservative all the time. While last year I disliked going to the Holy Mass, these days I would love going every day (and I would literally do that if I had more time and was a little less lazy and more disciplined).

Anyways, I’ve always wanted to find a girlfriend, get married and have children. Because of my shy nature (I’m very shy when I have to meet new people) I’ve never really been lucky with the first one - especially now that I really want only an orthodox Catholic girlfriend (they are terribly uncommon around here). I know that this is very uncommon these days so I don’t really normally tell people. I started praying to God so he would help me to find someone because I really wanted to share my life with a female.

But…about a few month ago the idea of priesthood started appearing in my mind. I’ve never wanted to be a priest and the idea of celebacy scared me. Before that (yet still this year, a friend of mine, a student discerning to priesthood, suggested me (I think it wasn’t truly serious) to become a priest but to that I said a definate no (though of course I didn’t say it this way)). So this confuses me, what is going on? Am I called by God? What does it mean to be called by God? How do I know that? It may be just some thing in my head, so how do I know?

I started praying and asking God to give me a sign - a sign to know that this is really His will. I truly want to follow his plans with me and that’s what I told him. You see, I’m scared and very uncertain I could ever become a priest, but if God wants me to be one, I trust him (and for that I need to know if that’s the case). It was about only few weeks ago when my priest, speaking about Blessed Mary, said that we should follow God and trust him to lead us to the right place. These words almost pearced me like a sword because I started thinking that maybe I’m really wrong in trying to rationalize why I’m not the right person. Mary didn’t do that though I doubt she thought she was the right one.

But what are really the reasons? Well, first, I think don’t know that much about my faith to make such an important decission. I still bqttle with doubts and I can’t see myself leading people when I trully need to be lead myself. I’m also not a good public speaker and reader and that is something that priests do all the time. I’m just generally timid in front of large congressions of people so imagine that. Finally however, my parents payed a lot for my education and I think it’s my obligation to return them their support (both in terms of money and physical care). I can’t see that happeneing if I would end up as a priest.

So what are your thoughts or suggestions? How do I know God’s call?

Thank you beforehand for your support!
God bless,
~Gandalf
 
Gandalf,

Your story sounds alot like my own. I was baptized Catholic as an infant, but did not receive first communion or confirmation until I was 23. I needed God in my life at the time and and learned all I could about God and the Church while in RCIA. It was then that I found out that God had a plan for my life, so I started praying about what His will was for me. Much to my surprise I started getting the idea that He wanted me to be a priest.

Like you I thought I was going to get married and have children.

I am now 36 years of age and I should be leaving for the seminary in the Fall.

The best advice I can give you is to find a spiritual director. I recommend a priest because they have been where you are. They can help you discern your vocation and give you support when you need it, which for me was alot of the time. It also helps to have the recommendation of a priest if you do apply to the seminary.

Concerning your shyness. I was very shy when I was younger and had a difficult time meeting and speaking to other people. With practice your shyness will go away. As you meet new people your confidence level will rise. If God wants you to be priest pray for the grace to be more comfortable when speaking to people. God is not going to ask you to do something that He has not equipped you to do.

The seminary will also help to build you up. It is not just a place of learning, but also a place of formation. They do their best to make sure that you are a fully developed person not just intellectually, but also emotionally.

Doubt is normal when God calls you to something that you have never considered. If you think that God is calling you do yourself a favor and check into it. Especially if you are still single. Do not wait and possibly involve another person later. I ran from God for quite awhile concerning my vocation it just made life difficult and wasted alot of time.

One more piece of advice for you. Go to adoration and spend time with Jesus. Do not worry about talking, just listen to Him. He already knows why you are there.🙂

God Bless you.
I will be praying for you during your time of discernment.

Craig
 
Craig,

thank you very much for posting. I feel better that I’m not alone and that others had to deal with my situation and succeeded. I will talk to my priest (he is both my priest and a very good friend) and tell him about my feelings. As I said, this is the first time I ever mentioned this idea since it has only been a short while since I started getting the idea (1 month or two). I’ll probably feel strange telling this to other people simly because I’m so uncertain but I will try to do that (what if I it’s something that will fade away? I don’t want to go back and say: “uuups, that was just a mistake”). I think he will understand though. You see, I’m so uncertain myself that I would rather wait - but maybe a priest can give me an advice and help me to search my soul. Maybe he could help me to first make sure that I know whether the call is real or not.

My parents still don’t know and I’m not planning to tell them until I’m be more certain. It’s funny. My mom asked me whether I want to be a priest only a few days ago, after she realized that I’m hanging out with priests and seminarians quite a lot (:)). I simply said that I don’t know, that I never know the the God’s will. She said that she doesn’t think I’m the right person. She really had no idea what was going on in my mind (I think). My dad is however a totally different story. He is an atheist and I don’t think he will understand. I mean, he isn’t against religion (he drives my mom to the church every sunday and waits outside during the whole mass and I respect him for that) but he really has a totally different idea about what I should be after I graduate. I actually undestand, since the past few month shocked me as well (I shared quite a lot of his ideas). He will surelly be the last person to know…**if **God is indeed calling me (I hope he will make it more and more apparent if he is so I can be sure).

Oh well, I still have one more year till I graduate so I guess that’s some time to search. I will take your suggestion and I will try to go to adoration more often. There sould be an adoration on campus almost every day after I return from summer holidays so I will try to squize it into my schedule.

So, may I ask you, how would you desribe your call? What did you experience and how did you come to realize that it’s indeed God calling you to the holy priesthood?

Mucho thanks! 🙂
~G
 
GandalfTheWhite said:
Hi!

I don’t know where to start with this because I’ve never revealed it to anyone else. Basically, I think I MIGHT be called to priesthood but I have doubts - actually DOUBTS.

I think I should start this way. I’m 21 years old and I’m a craddle Catholic. I went to church every Sunday, went to confession etc. during my younger years, however I was doing it basically because my mom wanted me to do it and I kinda felt obligated to follow her. Don’t get me wrong, I believed in the Trinity and the ‘basic stuff’ etc., but that’s probably where my faith ended - I didn’t really care much (nor understood). Two years ago I moved to the UK to study politics. I stopped living like a catholic but during this academic year something happened and I fully returned to the Church. I got confirmed this year and I love God and I love his Church very much. I’m an orthodox Catholic who is becomming more and more traditinalist and conservative all the time. While last year I disliked going to the Holy Mass, these days I would love going every day (and I would literally do that if I had more time and was a little less lazy and more disciplined).

Anyways, I’ve always wanted to find a girlfriend, get married and have children. Because of my shy nature (I’m very shy when I have to meet new people) I’ve never really been lucky with the first one - especially now that I really want only an orthodox Catholic girlfriend (they are terribly uncommon around here). I know that this is very uncommon these days so I don’t really normally tell people. I started praying to God so he would help me to find someone because I really wanted to share my life with a female.

But…about a few month ago the idea of priesthood started appearing in my mind. I’ve never wanted to be a priest and the idea of celebacy scared me. Before that (yet still this year, a friend of mine, a student discerning to priesthood, suggested me (I think it wasn’t truly serious) to become a priest but to that I said a definate no (though of course I didn’t say it this way)). So this confuses me, what is going on? Am I called by God? What does it mean to be called by God? How do I know that? It may be just some thing in my head, so how do I know?

I started praying and asking God to give me a sign - a sign to know that this is really His will. I truly want to follow his plans with me and that’s what I told him. You see, I’m scared and very uncertain I could ever become a priest, but if God wants me to be one, I trust him (and for that I need to know if that’s the case). It was about only few weeks ago when my priest, speaking about Blessed Mary, said that we should follow God and trust him to lead us to the right place. These words almost pearced me like a sword because I started thinking that maybe I’m really wrong in trying to rationalize why I’m not the right person. Mary didn’t do that though I doubt she thought she was the right one.

But what are really the reasons? Well, first, I think don’t know that much about my faith to make such an important decission. I still bqttle with doubts and I can’t see myself leading people when I trully need to be lead myself. I’m also not a good public speaker and reader and that is something that priests do all the time. I’m just generally timid in front of large congressions of people so imagine that. Finally however, my parents payed a lot for my education and I think it’s my obligation to return them their support (both in terms of money and physical care). I can’t see that happeneing if I would end up as a priest.

So what are your thoughts or suggestions? How do I know God’s call?

Thank you beforehand for your support!
God bless,
~Gandalf
Click to expand...
I have also felt a call to the priesthood only just a few months ago. What i did was pray every day, and i asked God if He is really calling me. I have now talked to a priest and i am on my way to getting myself a spirtual director. A spiritual director will tell me if my calling tot he priesthood is genuine or not.

But don’t worry about what happens, celibacy for me is now easy to handle. Trust God, if He is really caling you then eventually He will get HIS way. Jesus said it Himself, ‘i will be with you always until the end of time’. Be patient, don’t go crazy. Also don’t worry what your friends or family say, they don’t understand what your going throug, only you and God know.

God Bless
 
Thanks pawel!

You seems to be in almost the same position, just a bit ahead. I hope everything is going well and I wish you good luck. God bless you! 🙂

As I’ve already said, I will talk to my priest. He knows me quite well I think, so I’m really wondering how he is going to react when I’ll tell him. Actually, I probably won’t even care because I’ll be very nervous - it will be like going to the confession for the first time. I’ll do it after the summer holiday because I’m currently away (back home). This will basically give me few more months to think about it and of course pray about it. I’ll pray to God that he makes these thoughts and desire even stronger if he wants me to follow this path. Plus, of course, I’ll take that time to get used to the possibility because…well…it’s still freaking me out (it’s like winning a lottery but in consequence having to drastically change your life :eek: ).
 
Actually, I’ve got a question in addition to what I’ve already asked. When would you tell your parents (in my case my mom who is catholic) about you wanting to join the priesthood? Would you wait a bit more, like until you discuss it with your priest etc.? Or would you suggest just announcing it right ahead?

Pax Domini!
 
GandalfTheWhite said:
Actually, I’ve got a question in addition to what I’ve already asked. When would you tell your parents (in my case my mom who is catholic) about you wanting to join the priesthood? Would you wait a bit more, like until you discuss it with your priest etc.? Or would you suggest just announcing it right ahead?

Pax Domini!
Click to expand...
Haha, I actually told my mom just a short while ago. I prayed a lot today and I felt like I can’t keep it for myself anymore. She wasn’t supriced as much as I thought she would be. She said that it is my choice and that she won’t pull me nor push me. I feel better now. 👍

I think I’ll speak to my dad after I’m more certain about it and after I speak to my priest. As I already mentioned, I don’t think he’ll undestand and he probably won’t be too happy about it. But how is he going to react? I don’t know.
 
At the moment, I feel the same thing in my vocation - a genuine, well-thought-out desire for the married life and yet a “tugging” force towards the priesthood within the past year and a half or so. I’m 19 now, and it seems like just before my 18th birthday that I suddenly seriously felt calls towards the priesthood.

My parents, though nominally Catholic, would likely be completely baffled if I told them I announced to be a priest. Not only would they probably be surprised, I’ve a feeling they wouldn’t be all that supportive, if not outright discouraging. I’m entering my second year of premedicing undergraduate work right now, and they seem to be ready for years and years of medical schooling; a sudden shift to the seminary might shock them a bit, I’m afraid. :rolleyes: 🤷

I think I need a true spiritual director… I’ve turned, on occasion, to a Jesuit novitiate and a Jesuit priest on the issue, but I feel like I need to consult someone in a more formal and direct manner.

Please pray for me, for my vocation, and my attempt to be virtuous and humble!
 
C_Bautista said:
At the moment, I feel the same thing in my vocation - a genuine, well-thought-out desire for the married life and yet a “tugging” force towards the priesthood within the past year and a half or so. I’m 19 now, and it seems like just before my 18th birthday that I suddenly seriously felt calls towards the priesthood.

My parents, though nominally Catholic, would likely be completely baffled if I told them I announced to be a priest. Not only would they probably be surprised, I’ve a feeling they wouldn’t be all that supportive, if not outright discouraging. I’m entering my second year of premedicing undergraduate work right now, and they seem to be ready for years and years of medical schooling; a sudden shift to the seminary might shock them a bit, I’m afraid. :rolleyes: 🤷

I think I need a true spiritual director… I’ve turned, on occasion, to a Jesuit novitiate and a Jesuit priest on the issue, but I feel like I need to consult someone in a more formal and direct manner.

Please pray for me, for my vocation, and my attempt to be virtuous and humble!
Click to expand...
John Paul the 2nd’s life deam was the theatre (acting), but he gave it up because he was called to something else, and look how it turned out for him in the end.👍

I was initially afraid to tell my parents as well, but trust me i don’t feel like that anymore, because God gives us courage and strength. Remember, that the devil is real, you must be mindfull of it’s traps against you. Go reguarly to confession, so that your consience is clear, and you soul is pure.

Do not be afriad. Let the truth be your guide. The truth is Jesus Christ!!!
 
Hi Gandalf, Don’t worry, if God wants you to do it He’ll help you even if you’re shy. Remember Moses thought he wasn’t the right man for the job.

St Thomas Aquinas says you should only seek advice from people you know will encourage you.

Having wished to marry isn’t a sign against priestly vocation–marriage is a natural good, so it would be more worrisome if someone who was considering priesthood didn’t think marriage was desirable in any way.

Your parents won’t have wasted money paying for your college education, I’d hope it will serve you in good stead whatever you do. In terms of taking care of your parents, that is something to think about if you are an only child, but otherwise you should not let it hinder you. (I think.)

I would suggest if you have “friends” among the saints (favorite saints that you like to invoke) to especially remember them now and ask them for help. St John Vianney is wonderful for diocesan priesthood.

May God bless you! I’ll remember you in my prayers.
 
I think this is an interesting thread. For a long time I’ve felt very confident in my life/career plans. That is, until a couple months ago. Now I feel very uncertain.

Of course many of you wonder about the priesthood, but all of us have questions about where God intends us to be, whether inside the priesthood or out of it. How do you narrow things down?
I would add that I used to have these grand visions of myself years down the road, like getting married, raising a family, running for public office, and so on. Now I don’t really imagine that life for myself, but I also don’t imagine anything else. I don’t see myself in a different career, different lifestyle, or anything. It’s like I just don’t see anything!
 
Thank you very much for all your kind posts. I certainly feel better now with all your suggestions and assurances.

To update on what I posted some time ago, I decided, as I already suggested, that I would persue God’s will. So I accomodated with the idea that from that day I’m officially discerning the priesthood (ceteris paribus). Since then I don’t think I felt strong nudges I sometimes had before. Then I thought that it might be because I no longer need them since I already made my decission so I don’t know.

When I started thinking the whole thing, it started making me happy. I mean, the idea that Lord would be asking me to do something and I would abide just gaves me more faith to the point that I really want to do it. On the other hand I then start asking myself questions such as “what if I was wrong the whole time?” etc. I’m getting a bit afraid that I would start persuing it and then realize that that’s not where I should end up. Boy, I feel like I’m crazy.

But at the same time I still need to get used the idea. I can’t see myself doing this but that’s more less from the “I’m not good at such things” argument.

GOD is everything!
~G
 
Wow! Reading through this thread, and seeing all the young men thinking about the priesthood, is amazing! I’m so proud of you all! Thank you so much for being open to God’s will. The world needs priests, and it’s through openness like yours that God takes care of the world and provides us with saints (whether you end up as priests or married).

I’m a young woman who is hopefully (if I get accepted) going to be entering the convent in 321 days! A large part of my personal prayer routine involves praying for priests. I love our priests so much and just feel so grateful for them that I’ve found it natural to hear the Lord telling me to pray for them. Reading through this thread, I’d really like to pray for all of you. If you would like me to pray for you by name, you could private message me your first name (no last names, I don’t want to creep on you or anything). Otherwise, I will pray for you and all young men discerning the priesthood in general.

As far as advice goes… I would definitely suggest getting a spiritual director. They can help you distinguish between mere waves of emotion or actual movements of your heart sent by the Lord. Also, I would recommend talking to your parents sooner rather than later, if you can. It’s easier to tell your parents “I might be open to the priesthood” and then give them time to get used to the idea as you discern, rather than to suddenly tell them “hey, I’m entering the seminary in a month. Hope you’re cool with that.” Ultimately, seek what gives you peace. Christ wants to make you happy. When you find what He has called you to, you will realize that it satisfies the deepest desires of your heart. Even if you are scared of elements of the priesthood, or some things sound hard, there will be a sense of peace present deep inside all the same.

God bless you all, and I hope and pray you will be able to discover His will for your life!

P.S. If you haven’t, you should watch the film Fishers of Men. It’s a beautiful documentary on the priesthood, and can be found on Youtube.
 
I am always enormously impressed whenever I find a young person who knows exactly what he wants to do “when he grows up” and has a concrete notion of what to do next.

It is a rare thing, however, to find such people.

In fact, the flip side is something I run into much more often. I recently spoke with a person hitting 40 or so, who was still searching for that “when I grow up” job. Part of that, to be sure, is the person, but part of that, too, is the rushing, changing nature of work in 2014.

I am highly skeptical of the notion of asking God for direct signs. When they happen, they happen.

The problem here is that in asking for signs, you’re salting the well: you’re saying that you are ready to frame reality in a particular way from the onset.

I also think the idea is rather impious. I making such a request suggests that the requester is putting himself on a par with God.

The question the OP has to ask himself is whether this sense of calling is naturally developing, or if it is a kind of slow and somewhat unconscious solution-finding to his current situation.

Any update on your situation?

Anyway, OP, the “grass is always greener on the other side.” I know, as a married man, that the religious life can sometimes look AWFULLY appealing. It’s not a one way street there; you GET something as well as give up something.
 
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