Protestants and Divorce

[stmaria]

Through my many years on this earth I have known many Protestants. They would quote from the Bible, preach from the Bible and all the while say that they have been saved, for they believe.
Yet later I would find out that they have all been divorced and remarried. How is this possible? They are living in adultery. The have committed a grave sin against God.
The Bible forbids one to divorce and remarry except for unfaithfulness. And let us be honest. Most marriages end because of everything except unfaithfulness.

So Protestants how do you justify divorce and remarriage in your faith?

“But I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for marital unfaithfulness, causes her to** commit adultery**, and anyone who marries a woman so divorced commits adultery.” Matt. 5:32:

‘Anyone who divorces his wife and marries another woman **commits adultery **against her. And if she divorces her husband and marries another man, she **commits adultery’ **" (Mk. 10:2-12).

“I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for marital unfaithfulness, and marries another woman commits adultery” (Matt. 19:9).

Anyone who divorces his wife and marries another woman commits adultery, and the man who marries a divorced woman commits adultery" (Lk. 16:18).

 

[sterryfamily]

The problem is in their relativist ideas. Anyone can come up with a plausible interpretation of the Scriptures - but that doesn’t make it accurate. Yet, so many do. And they use these to justify their own ideas, making God to conform to them.

Your example is a perfect one. The Church has always taught a different reading of the above passages, never even allowing for UNFAITHFULNESS. Part of the problem lies with various possible meanings to the pivotal word in the passage, porneia. Part of the problem lies with our attempt to understand St. Matthew’s motivation for including the *porneia *exception to begin with. (The NAB renders the exception as, “except in the case of an unlawful marriage.”)

This just shows how God is wise in giving us the Church. And how the Church is wise in adhereing to Sacred Tradition. After all, the Bible commands it.

 

[DDClark]

Through my many years on this earth I have known many Protestants. They would quote from the Bible, preach from the Bible and all the while say that they have been saved, for they believe.
Yet later I would find out that they have all been divorced and remarried. How is this possible? They are living in adultery. The have committed a grave sin against God.
The Bible forbids one to divorce and remarry except for unfaithfulness. And let us be honest. Most marriages end because of everything except unfaithfulness.

So Protestants how do you justify divorce and remarriage in your faith?

“But I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for marital unfaithfulness, causes her to** commit adultery**, and anyone who marries a woman so divorced commits adultery.” Matt. 5:32:

‘Anyone who divorces his wife and marries another woman **commits adultery **against her. And if she divorces her husband and marries another man, she **commits adultery’ **" (Mk. 10:2-12).

“I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for marital unfaithfulness, and marries another woman commits adultery” (Matt. 19:9).

Anyone who divorces his wife and marries another woman commits adultery, and the man who marries a divorced woman commits adultery" (Lk. 16:18).

I’m not exactly sure. I know I’ve given it quite a bit of thought lately (based on thoughts about converting to Catholicism which would require my husband to obtain an annulment).

My husband’s first wife did commit adultery (and became pregnant with the affair partner’s child while still married to my husband). She did not wish to reconcile and married the affair partner immediately after the divorce was final.

This is my first (and final) marriage. Marriage under the best of circumstances is not easy, and so many people don’t seem to take vows seriously.

There are many high-profile protestant Christians who have divorced, and of course, we often don’t know the details. I do think this sets a bad example for those who are faithful protestant Christians.

 

[DDClark]

The problem is in their relativist ideas. Anyone can come up with a plausible interpretation of the Scriptures - but that doesn’t make it accurate. Yet, so many do. And they use these to justify their own ideas, making God to conform to them.

Your example is a perfect one. The Church has always taught a different reading of the above passages, never even allowing for UNFAITHFULNESS. Part of the problem lies with various possible meanings to the pivotal word in the passage, porneia. Part of the problem lies with our attempt to understand St. Matthew’s motivation for including the *porneia *exception to begin with. (The NAB renders the exception as, “except in the case of an unlawful marriage.”)

This just shows how God is wise in giving us the Church. And how the Church is wise in adhereing to Sacred Tradition. After all, the Bible commands it.

I’ve researched many translations of the Bible, and the NAB is the only version I’ve found that translated “porneia” as “unlawful”. All others have defined the Greek word in terms of sexual immorality of some kind (some use the word adultery, some don’t).

I do understand, though, that the Catholic teaching is different.

 

[allischalmers]

And how does that differ form the phony anallment thing that the Catholic Church has cooked up. The Bible says nothing about anallment. It’s just another Catholic loophole like the baptism of desire thing.
How can you anall a marriage where there have been children. What does that do to the kids?
You still would have had sex and nothing can change that

 

[sterryfamily]

I’ve researched many translations of the Bible, and the NAB is the only version I’ve found that translated “porneia” as “unlawful”. All others have defined the Greek word in terms of sexual immorality of some kind (some use the word adultery, some don’t).

I do understand, though, that the Catholic teaching is different.

Porneia actually has broad possible meaning but they all revert to the root meaning of “against the norm” or “against the natural law”, etc.

“Against the natural law” is how we get the word pornography.

Some dudes came along later, who looked up *porneia *and decided they could make it fit their idea of allowing for divorce.

 

[sterryfamily]

And how does that differ form the phony anallment thing that the Catholic Church has cooked up. The Bible says nothing about anallment. It’s just another Catholic loophole like the baptism of desire thing.
How can you anall a marriage where there have been children. What does that do to the kids?
You still would have had sex and nothing can change that

You clearly don’t understand annulments.

 

[HannahLisa]

This is somewhat off topic, but what exactly is the difference between an annulment and divorce? What makes an annulment okay and divorce not? One is legal, one is sacramental, but I think both go against Jesus’ teaching.

I have no justification for what is apparently a typical Protestant view on divorce. I don’t see divorce as “okay”, though I’m not about to call someone an adulteress if they remarry after leaving an abusive relationship. Another off-topic question: What is the Catholic viewpoint on divorce because of an abusive relationship?

 

[c659smith]

Hannah
Here is the Catholic side of Divorce and annulments

“Therefore a man leaves his father and his mother and cleaves to his wife, and they become one flesh” (Gen. 2:24). From the beginning God intended marriage to be a lifelong commitment, and his displeasure with divorce was made clear: “For I hate divorce, says the Lord the God of Israel” (Mal. 2:16).

He said to his disciples, “Whoever divorces his wife and marries another commits adultery against her; and if she divorces her husband and marries another, she commits adultery” (Mark 10:11–12)

Paul taught that divorce of a natural marriage is not desirable (1 Cor. 7:12–14), but he went on to teach that natural marriages may be dissolved in certain circumstances: “If the unbelieving partner desires to separate, let it be so; in such a case the brother or sister is not bound. For God has called us to peace” (1 Cor. 7:15).

Church law provides for the dissolution of natural marriages in certain circumstances as well:
A marriage entered into by two non-baptized persons is dissolved by means of the Pauline privilege in favor of the faith of the party who has received baptism by the very fact that a new marriage is contracted by the same party, provided that the non-baptized party departs. (CIC 1143)

Marriages not yet ratified through consummation are treated similarly:
For a just cause, the Roman pontiff can dissolve a non-consummated marriage between baptized persons or between a baptized party and a non-baptized party at the request of both parties or of one of them, even if the other party is unwilling. (CIC 1142)

Annulments are sometimes mistakenly called “Catholic divorces.” In reality, annulments do not presume to end marriages at all but simply recognize and declare, after sufficient investigation, that a marriage never existed in the first place. If a marriage never really existed, then there is nothing to dissolve. Such situations can come about for one (or more) of three reasons: lack of sufficient capacity, failure to adequately consent, or violation of canonical form.

Now lets try to understand something here and that is that in the Catholic Church two baptized individuals can be most protestant religions.

Violation of canonical means justice of the peace, in a court house, A moslem and a Christian, Jew and a Christian if not ok’d by the Church.

As far as an Abusive marriage the Catholic Church does not insist you live together but you are still married and to remarry or to have sexual relations with another is adultery

A person who divorces thriugh a civil court is still married in the eyes of the Church and God.

So if one remarries one cannot truly repent and that is to turn away from sin and promise to try not to recommit the same sin adultery. You would have to then not intend to have sex again with your new lawful husband or wife.

In that case you would not be able to receive the Sacraments of the Catholic Church but you can still attend Mass and receive our Lord through Spiritual Communion by requesting this from Jesus,

The Catholic Church is not ultimately the judge but Jesus is. But to be a Catholic one must abide by the Churches decisions . What is bound here on earth and what is loosen here on earth was given to the Apostles.by Jesus.

 

[Tonks40]

Hannah
Here is the Catholic side of Divorce and annulments

“Therefore a man leaves his father and his mother and cleaves to his wife, and they become one flesh” (Gen. 2:24). From the beginning God intended marriage to be a lifelong commitment, and his displeasure with divorce was made clear: “For I hate divorce, says the Lord the God of Israel” (Mal. 2:16).

He said to his disciples, “Whoever divorces his wife and marries another commits adultery against her; and if she divorces her husband and marries another, she commits adultery” (Mark 10:11–12)

Paul taught that divorce of a natural marriage is not desirable (1 Cor. 7:12–14), but he went on to teach that natural marriages may be dissolved in certain circumstances: “If the unbelieving partner desires to separate, let it be so; in such a case the brother or sister is not bound. For God has called us to peace” (1 Cor. 7:15).

Church law provides for the dissolution of natural marriages in certain circumstances as well:
A marriage entered into by two non-baptized persons is dissolved by means of the Pauline privilege in favor of the faith of the party who has received baptism by the very fact that a new marriage is contracted by the same party, provided that the non-baptized party departs. (CIC 1143)

Marriages not yet ratified through consummation are treated similarly:
For a just cause, the Roman pontiff can dissolve a non-consummated marriage between baptized persons or between a baptized party and a non-baptized party at the request of both parties or of one of them, even if the other party is unwilling. (CIC 1142)

Annulments are sometimes mistakenly called “Catholic divorces.” In reality, annulments do not presume to end marriages at all but simply recognize and declare, after sufficient investigation, that a marriage never existed in the first place. If a marriage never really existed, then there is nothing to dissolve. Such situations can come about for one (or more) of three reasons: lack of sufficient capacity, failure to adequately consent, or violation of canonical form.

Now lets try to understand something here and that is that in the Catholic Church two baptized individuals can be most protestant religions.

Violation of canonical means justice of the peace, in a court house, A moslem and a Christian, Jew and a Christian if not ok’d by the Church.

As far as an Abusive marriage the Catholic Church does not insist you live together but you are still married and to remarry or to have sexual relations with another is adultery

A person who divorces thriugh a civil court is still married in the eyes of the Church and God.

So if one remarries one cannot truly repent and that is to turn away from sin and promise to try not to recommit the same sin adultery. You would have to then not intend to have sex again with your new lawful husband or wife.

In that case you would not be able to receive the Sacraments of the Catholic Church but you can still attend Mass and receive our Lord through Spiritual Communion by requesting this from Jesus,

The Catholic Church is not ultimately the judge but Jesus is. But to be a Catholic one must abide by the Churches decisions . What is bound here on earth and what is loosen here on earth was given to the Apostles.by Jesus

Beautiful explanation, c659smith!

For those who look at this and think, “Man, the Catholic Church has too many rules!” - please note what is in bold print. Christ IS the Church. Those who love and want to follow Christ must abide by Him and in Him.

 

[O.S.Luke]

Since Protestants aren’t married by a witness of the Catholic Church (priest or deacon), their marriages aren’t valid anyway, are they?

 

[c659smith]

O.S. Luke

Their marriages and the marriage of a catholic and a Protestant are very well valid. The rule is both must be baptised and married through making vows before God.

A priest or Deacon does not make the vows or marry them but is a witness. This is one Sacrament the Couples do themseves before God with all baptized Christians as witness

 

[Claire_from_DE]

Since Protestants aren’t married by a witness of the Catholic Church (priest or deacon), their marriages aren’t valid anyway, are they?

The Catholic church views the marriage of any two baptized people (of different genders) as valid and as a sacrament whether performed in a church or elsewhere. It imposes on Catholics the additional requirement that it be witnessed by a priest and take place in a Catholic church unless the bishop dispenses from this requirement.

 

[DDClark]

Beautiful explanation, c659smith!

For those who look at this and think, “Man, the Catholic Church has too many rules!” - please note what is in bold print. Christ IS the Church. Those who love and want to follow Christ must abide by Him and in Him.

I agree that c659smith’s explanation was excellent.

As I mentioned earlier, I have been trying to process all of this due to personal circumstances.

The problem is that as a non-Catholic, I do not believe that the Catholic church = Christ. That poses a big problem in terms of annulment.

 

[stmaria]

I agree that c659smith’s explanation was excellent.

As I mentioned earlier, I have been trying to process all of this due to personal circumstances.

The problem is that as a non-Catholic, I do not believe that the Catholic church = Christ. That poses a big problem in terms of annulment.

I have personal experience with this as my two brothers are divorced. Both applied for annulments. It took two years for the process to be completed. One annulment was granted the other was not. Both brothers have remarried. One is living in a state of adultery. He knows he has sinned. He doesn’t try to justify it. He is still a Catholic and goes to Mass but he can never again receive the sacraments of the Church.

There is no doubt, in my mind, that Jesus Christ established HIS Church when he told Peter, “And I tell you that you are Peter, and on this rock I will build my church, and the gates of Hell will not overcome it.”.-Matthew 16:18
It makes common sense that Christ would leave with his Church a hierarchy that would rule on such things as annulments in Marriage> Christ clearly says divorce is impossible, “, except it be for fornication”. His divinely established Church, the Catholic Church, has the authority to determine if a marriage is valid or can be annulled.

Douay Rheims Translation drbo.org/
Matthew 19: 6 Therefore now they are not two, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let no man put asunder. 7 They say to him: Why then did Moses command to give a bill of divorce, and to put away? 8 He saith to them: Because Moses by reason of the hardness of your heart permitted you to put away your wives: but from the beginning it was not so. 9 And I say to you, that whosoever shall put away his wife, except it be for fornication, and shall marry another, committeth adultery: and he that shall marry her that is put away, committeth adultery.

 

[DDClark]

There is no doubt, in my mind, that Jesus Christ established HIS Church when he told Peter, “And I tell you that you are Peter, and on this rock I will build my church, and the gates of Hell will not overcome it.”.-Matthew 16:18

It makes common sense that Christ would leave with his Church a hierarchy that would rule on such things as annulments in Marriage> Christ clearly says divorce is impossible, “, except it be for fornication”. His divinely established Church, the Catholic Church, has the authority to determine if a marriage is valid or can be annulled.

I respect your beliefs, but it doesn’t still doesn’t make “common sense” to me.

Out of curiosity, were you raised Catholic or did you convert to Catholicism? In either circumstance, I can understand why you believe what you do, I just don’t believe it myself.

Also - the scripture you quoted mentions “fornication” and it’s my understanding that isn’t a grounds for divorce according to the Catholic church.

I currently believe that scripture does make provision for my husband’s divorce from his first marriage.

As an aside, I also think that there would be a case for annulment through the Catholic church based on circumstances related to the marriage itself (and before the marriage took place).

 

[HannahLisa]

c659smith, thank you for your explanation! It definitely clarified that for me.

I can understand a marriage being declared invalid if it was done in front of secular instead of religious authorities. What exactly does “lack of sufficient capacity” mean?

“Failure to adequately consent” is the one I would probably have issues with, depending on the interpretation. I once had this one explained to me briefly, and some of the short examples the lady used were not ones where I saw how that invalidated the marriage. I think she said that if a couple married young, they could probably get an annulment based on this one, for instance. This lady was someone involved in getting people annulments, so I think she probably knew what she was talking about.

Do you know of any good websites with more information on this?