Putting education before starting a family

[chevalier]

Me, I’m 30 and single and have never met an approrpriate man to marry. I have a bachelors and my boss wants me to do my post grad deploma, and I’d like to do my masters if I don’t get a man any time soon. I’m also starting a bachelor of theology via correspondance in the next month. Would I throw all that away should I find a guy to marry? Of course not, why? Cos you can do both. That’s why. The guy should love you enough to accept your education process, marry when you’re finished and have kids so they don’t interfer with your classes if that’s the concern. If he can’t wait, let him go. If you can’t wait, then you can always pick up study when you’re 50.

And any man who doesn’t want you educated, well, that to me is a huge red flag.

You just need to find a man who will appreciate an attractive degree.

 

[Luvz2travel]

Hi Everyone,

I was at bible study and the topic of having children was the theme that day. And the teacher dicussed infertility being on the rise. Now, I think I must have misunderstood something and I am hoping people can clarify

The teacher said that artifical birth control is one thing that makes people infertile. They don’t realize it until they have try to have kids. Then she went on to say that since people are waiting to extablish their careers first, women are older when they try to have children and thus are not as fertile

One woman said (and the group agreed) that a woman’s most fertile years are between 18 and 25. Not being a doctor, I wouldn’t know. Then the topic turned to people are selfish for wanting a career and the big house first. So I said ‘But most Catholic mom’s now adays would love for their daughter’s to be educated and most people don’t finish university until they are at least 22’ To which one man said ‘so’

I left there with the impression that it is selfish for a woman to get an education. I doubt that is what the teacher was saying because she has a master’s. So I guess my question is, if a woman is willing to remain single and chaste until her education is finished, would God not understand that?

If anyone could please clarify what the teacher’s point was, please do

CM

I take issue with anyone who says if you don’t do such and such by a certain time it’s selfish or sinful. The way the world is today parents have an obligation to make sure their daughters can support themselves. Not everyone finds the right person to settle down with or has kids. There are many reasons some put off having kids besides an education. I was always working never had the money or opportunity for a full college education but I’m a strong advocate for it. I would still be working in a stock or cashier job making maybe a little above minimum wage if it wasn’t for the fact I went to business school. You can plan out your life and if you’re lucky maybe it will go as planned and then again maybe things will happen and you have to go another direction.

 

[chevalier]

I take issue with anyone who says if you don’t do such and such by a certain time it’s selfish or sinful. The way the world is today parents have an obligation to make sure their daughters can support themselves. Not everyone finds the right person to settle down with or has kids. There are many reasons some put off having kids besides an education. I was always working never had the money or opportunity for a full college education but I’m a strong advocate for it. I would still be working in a stock or cashier job making maybe a little above minimum wage if it wasn’t for the fact I went to business school. You can plan out your life and if you’re lucky maybe it will go as planned and then again maybe things will happen and you have to go another direction.

True, there are many possible reasons but sometimes the reason really has to do with some form of immaturity. For example I know I could be more mature and if I had consistently acted maturely without cutting myself slack I might be in a different place from where I am right now. I guess you can say the kind of immaturity where you need entertainment to the point you cut study time for it (I can show at least one important exam that I failed by the narrowest margin possible and litigated for 3 years and lost, where, had I not taken a week of rest, I would probably have passed and I could possible be working a different job right now, although there’s no guarantee it would have ended up better overall) is, in a sense, selfish. People don’t really have much right to call me to book for something like that on account of my doing a less than good service to my potential future family (too far-stretched causation link) but I think God has that right and I might need to admit it before myself. So yeah, there’s some truth sometimes in it when people wonder.

And by the way, I can attest to the fact that you never know when a class you took somewhere somewhen may come of use you don’t know when. In fact, it may look like a life-saver (or at least living-saver) when you’re in a tough spot and come out of it due to a skill that allows you to get paid. One shouldn’t neglect the opportunity to learn skills. Besides, I believe that education is a mission. Academics have their mission in the society. Grads are academics too even if they don’t stay at the academia.