Question about faith and the afterlife

[Evan395]

Hello everyone! I’m a newbie to this website, so if I posted this in the wrong section, I apologize!

My name is Evan, I’m 17, and I’ve been having a lot of problems keeping my faith recently (about 6 months). I have lots of problems, lots of questions, and maybe I’ll bring some of them up in the future, but right now I wanted to ask about one of the biggest problems I have: the afterlife, specifically hell.

On monday the 20th, it will have been 4 years since my Grandfather passed away at the young age of 55. In fact, it was 4 years ago tomorrow that he got sick. I was only 13 years old when it happened, so it’s only occured to me within the past few months that he may not be in heaven. He was a Christian, not a Catholic, and I’m pretty sure he hadn’t been to church in quite a while. On top of that, he was divorced twice. The second time, was because his wife was starting to act weird, and didn’t want her around him or me and my siblings. But I’ve heard that to get to heaven, you have to be a Catholic, and receive the sacraments of baptism, confession, communion, etc. Adding on the two divorces, I can’t help but worry that he didn’t make it.

But he was, next to my parents, probably the greatest person I have known in my short life. He was kind, generous, cared very much about others. I remember that his funeral had close to a hundred people, and even more at the viewing, because he had touched so many people. And he wasn’t some great rich egomaniac either. He was a small business owner, with only one other employee, my uncle. But he was such a nice person, that plenty of people were genuinely saddened by his passing.

I mention all of this because I have a hard time, a very hard time, wrapping my head around the possibility that a loving God may be punishing such a nice person for eternity. It’s really tearing me up inside to think about it, and I can’t help but think about it. I have no one else to talk to about this, so I was really hoping that I could get some kind of (name removed by moderator)ut or opinions about this. It would be greatly appreciated.

Thank you very much! God bless!

 

[hazcompat]

The Catechism of The Catholic Church

1058 The Church prays that no one should be lost: “Lord, let me never be parted from you.” If it is true that no one can save himself, it is also true that God “desires all men to be saved” (1 Tim 2:4), and that for him “all things are possible” (Mt 19:26).

Peace

 

[Ceil-1]

Dear Evan,

We do not know what goes on in those final moments before death. One thing we can be sure of is that God is all-merciful and wants us to be with Him. What is more, God is outside of time, so you can pray for your grandfather even now. Who knows but that your prayers today, or even at that time, may have merited him some grace at his hour of death that you know nothing about. What is needed here is trust.

We want our religion to be in one neat package with all the answers spelled out. But, the truth is that our Faith, like most of life, is a mystery, and always will be. Our job is spelled out and we are to trust in God for the details. We are to love others, especially our family, and pray and do penance for ourselves and others, and to trust that God, in His infinite wisdom, will make everything come out all right. That is our responsiblity. Anything else is sort of trying to be the one in control.

I personally believe that we get a visitation or some sort of revelation in that moment right before death which is sort of a bridge between this world and the next. This is the most important and defining moment of our life when we get a glimpse of what it’s really all about and have an opportunity to choose who we belong to. It is just my own belief, but it is based on a lot of saints’ writings, tradition and other experiences.

It is natural, at your age, to be tempted away from your Faith. The devil is aware of your moment of weakness, so hold onto the rock. He will try to confuse you. Rest assured that there are answers to all your questions and resist the temptation to run off to things that “tickle the ears” as the Scriptures say. Also, read the Bible for a few minutes each day along with your praying. Will pray for you. :angel1:

 

[Aggies08]

You can trust in the mercy of the Lord (we ALL need it!), and pray, fast, or do other spiritual works for him

 

[DavidFilmer]

But I’ve heard that to get to heaven, you have to be a Catholic, and receive the sacraments of baptism, confession, communion, etc.

You don’t need to be Catholic to get to heaven (it’s nice, but not necessary). But it is important to receive valid Christian Baptism - this is the ordinary means of salvation. Since your grandfather was a Christian, he was probably baptized. Most protestants have perfectly valid Baptism (ie, done with water using the Trinitarian form). The Catholic Church accepts and recognizes these Baptisms as valid.

Adding on the two divorces, I can’t help but worry that he didn’t make it.

That is probably something that you don’t need to worry about.

Once we are Baptized, the only way we can loose salvation is through mortal sin. Divorce and remarriage is adultery (Mark 10:11), but it is quite possible that adultery may not be a mortal sin.

Any sin has the potential to be a mortal sin, but certain very strict criteria must be perfectly met. One of these criteria is full and complete knowledge of the sinful nature of the act. Many protestant churches tolerate or justify divorce and teach that it is permissible (perhaps under certain circumstances), and many people of good intent have been misled by this. If your grandfather did not have complete knowledge that he was committing adultery - if any part of him genuinely thought it was OK - then he did not commit a mortal sin.

But he was, next to my parents, probably the greatest person I have known in my short life.

I have also lost a grandfather who sounds much like yours (and he was also protestant). I think of him often, and I look forward to seeing him again in heaven, if I make it (I’m not too worried about him, but me - that’s a different story).

 

[michaelmas]

I don’t know for sure if this relates to your situation or not but when I Lived in Utah I often wondered about the mormons whether they would be saved or not. My priest out there told me that if they did not believe in a triune God that they were not christian. If they denied that they deny Christ.

I had a hard time rectifying that with the way God is to my understanding. How could a God who loves the world so much condemn a person who has done so much good for the poor, the hungry, the prison bound, the naked, etc. SO I asked another priest when I moved back to my home state and he said in the Catechism (give me the readings but I can’t recall off hand where) that there is baptism of desire.

We don’t know where your Grandpa was, the trials he had, the struggles he had, or what was in his heart. My Dad who passed away this past Feb. had his own issues with God after my brother died at 21 of blood cancer. My Dad was a good man who would do whatever he could for family, friends, and the less fortunate. But he was angry with God and My mom is the same way. My Dad and mom both do good and sacrifice(d) so much for family and friend that I can not imagine our God condemning them.

If you look up Mortal sin in the catechism you will see a list a check list and when you read that recall your own sins and see how difficult it is to commit a mortal sin.

May your grandfather rest in peace, eternal rest grant unto him, o’lord, and let perpetual light shine upon him, Amen.

 

[ccmnxc]

The Catholic Church has not condemned a single person to Hell. Not one. You don’t hae to be Catholic or have all the sacraments, but you do need to accept God’s love and mercy.

 

[ladymlee]

Evan,

I believe that your grandfather can go to heaven even if he was not Catholic, and especially if he was a good person. God is all loving and all merciful. He didn’t send Jesus here for just the benefit of Catholics. He sent Jesus here to open the gates of heaven to everyone. I believe that one of the reasons purgatory exists is so that everyone who is a good person can go to heaven whether they are Catholic or not. I personally am glad that there is purgatory, because I think this is one of the ways that God gives and shows His mercy to everyone. I believe that as long as person was not truly evil right up to the dying moment, then heaven is open to them.

 

[Linusthe2nd]

Hello everyone! I’m a newbie to this website, so if I posted this in the wrong section, I apologize!

My name is Evan, I’m 17, and I’ve been having a lot of problems keeping my faith recently (about 6 months). I have lots of problems, lots of questions, and maybe I’ll bring some of them up in the future, but right now I wanted to ask about one of the biggest problems I have: the afterlife, specifically hell.

On monday the 20th, it will have been 4 years since my Grandfather passed away at the young age of 55. In fact, it was 4 years ago tomorrow that he got sick. I was only 13 years old when it happened, so it’s only occured to me within the past few months that he may not be in heaven. He was a Christian, not a Catholic, and I’m pretty sure he hadn’t been to church in quite a while. On top of that, he was divorced twice. The second time, was because his wife was starting to act weird, and didn’t want her around him or me and my siblings. But I’ve heard that to get to heaven, you have to be a Catholic, and receive the sacraments of baptism, confession, communion, etc. Adding on the two divorces, I can’t help but worry that he didn’t make it.

But he was, next to my parents, probably the greatest person I have known in my short life. He was kind, generous, cared very much about others. I remember that his funeral had close to a hundred people, and even more at the viewing, because he had touched so many people. And he wasn’t some great rich egomaniac either. He was a small business owner, with only one other employee, my uncle. But he was such a nice person, that plenty of people were genuinely saddened by his passing.

I mention all of this because I have a hard time, a very hard time, wrapping my head around the possibility that a loving God may be punishing such a nice person for eternity. It’s really tearing me up inside to think about it, and I can’t help but think about it. I have no one else to talk to about this, so I was really hoping that I could get some kind of (name removed by moderator)ut or opinions about this. It would be greatly appreciated.

Thank you very much! God bless!

The thing to do is be a saint yourself and offer your good deeds and sacrafices as penance for his sins. I always say this little prayer each day:

" Father please grant the grace of true conversion and reconcilliation retroactively for Mom, Dad, Jim, etc and grant that they have recieved the grace of final perseverence and have died in the state of sanctifying grace and will be made worthy to partake of eternal rest through the intersession of the Blessed Virgin and all the Saints, through your Son our Lord Jesus Christ." Amen

Have you read the Catechism of the Catholic Church yet. Might be a good idea.

vatican.va/archive/ENG0015/_INDEX.HTM

 

[Evan395]

Dear Evan,

We do not know what goes on in those final moments before death. One thing we can be sure of is that God is all-merciful and wants us to be with Him. What is more, God is outside of time, so you can pray for your grandfather even now. Who knows but that your prayers today, or even at that time, may have merited him some grace at his hour of death that you know nothing about. What is needed here is trust.

We want our religion to be in one neat package with all the answers spelled out. But, the truth is that our Faith, like most of life, is a mystery, and always will be. Our job is spelled out and we are to trust in God for the details. We are to love others, especially our family, and pray and do penance for ourselves and others, and to trust that God, in His infinite wisdom, will make everything come out all right. That is our responsiblity. Anything else is sort of trying to be the one in control.

I personally believe that we get a visitation or some sort of revelation in that moment right before death which is sort of a bridge between this world and the next. This is the most important and defining moment of our life when we get a glimpse of what it’s really all about and have an opportunity to choose who we belong to. It is just my own belief, but it is based on a lot of saints’ writings, tradition and other experiences.

It is natural, at your age, to be tempted away from your Faith. The devil is aware of your moment of weakness, so hold onto the rock. He will try to confuse you. Rest assured that there are answers to all your questions and resist the temptation to run off to things that “tickle the ears” as the Scriptures say. Also, read the Bible for a few minutes each day along with your praying. Will pray for you. :angel1:

Ceil-1,

Thank you very much for your kind words and prayers.

It’s weird, because for a period of 2 months, I felt this inner urge to turn away from the faith, because of this issue and others, and considered myself an atheist. During that stage, I initially felt very liberated, and then after about a week, felt really empty. Recently though, I have had the overpowering urge to “return” to it (even though I really never “left” anything, I suppose), and I can feel God trying to guide me back to the faith. Honestly, it really does feel good to know that I’ve probably found the truth . It’s just that sometimes I get confused I guess, with things like this.

I appreciate your prayers! I will pray for you as well!

 

[Evan395]

You don’t need to be Catholic to get to heaven (it’s nice, but not necessary). But it is important to receive valid Christian Baptism - this is the ordinary means of salvation. Since your grandfather was a Christian, he was probably baptized. Most protestants have perfectly valid Baptism (ie, done with water using the Trinitarian form). The Catholic Church accepts and recognizes these Baptisms as valid.

That is probably something that you don’t need to worry about.

Once we are Baptized, the only way we can loose salvation is through mortal sin. Divorce and remarriage is adultery (Mark 10:11), but it is quite possible that adultery may not be a mortal sin.

Any sin has the potential to be a mortal sin, but certain very strict criteria must be perfectly met. One of these criteria is full and complete knowledge of the sinful nature of the act. Many protestant churches tolerate or justify divorce and teach that it is permissible (perhaps under certain circumstances), and many people of good intent have been misled by this. If your grandfather did not have complete knowledge that he was committing adultery - if any part of him genuinely thought it was OK - then he did not commit a mortal sin.

I have also lost a grandfather who sounds much like yours (and he was also protestant). I think of him often, and I look forward to seeing him again in heaven, if I make it (I’m not too worried about him, but me - that’s a different story).

Thank you very much for your kind words and opinion.

 

[Evan395]

I don’t know for sure if this relates to your situation or not but when I Lived in Utah I often wondered about the mormons whether they would be saved or not. My priest out there told me that if they did not believe in a triune God that they were not christian. If they denied that they deny Christ.

I had a hard time rectifying that with the way God is to my understanding. How could a God who loves the world so much condemn a person who has done so much good for the poor, the hungry, the prison bound, the naked, etc. SO I asked another priest when I moved back to my home state and he said in the Catechism (give me the readings but I can’t recall off hand where) that there is baptism of desire.

We don’t know where your Grandpa was, the trials he had, the struggles he had, or what was in his heart. My Dad who passed away this past Feb. had his own issues with God after my brother died at 21 of blood cancer. My Dad was a good man who would do whatever he could for family, friends, and the less fortunate. But he was angry with God and My mom is the same way. My Dad and mom both do good and sacrifice(d) so much for family and friend that I can not imagine our God condemning them.

If you look up Mortal sin in the catechism you will see a list a check list and when you read that recall your own sins and see how difficult it is to commit a mortal sin.

May your grandfather rest in peace, eternal rest grant unto him, o’lord, and let perpetual light shine upon him, Amen.

Thanks very much for your kind words and prayers. They are very much appreciated!

 

[Evan395]

Evan,

I believe that your grandfather can go to heaven even if he was not Catholic, and especially if he was a good person. God is all loving and all merciful. He didn’t send Jesus here for just the benefit of Catholics. He sent Jesus here to open the gates of heaven to everyone. I believe that one of the reasons purgatory exists is so that everyone who is a good person can go to heaven whether they are Catholic or not. I personally am glad that there is purgatory, because I think this is one of the ways that God gives and shows His mercy to everyone. I believe that as long as person was not truly evil right up to the dying moment, then heaven is open to them.

One thing I think I can be assured of is that he was about as far from evil as humanly possible. Thank you for your kind words. They mean a lot!

 

[Evan395]

The thing to do is be a saint yourself and offer your good deeds and sacrafices as penance for his sins. I always say this little prayer each day:

" Father please grant the grace of true conversion and reconcilliation retroactively for Mom, Dad, Jim, etc and grant that they have recieved the grace of final perseverence and have died in the state of sanctifying grace and will be made worthy to partake of eternal rest through the intersession of the Blessed Virgin and all the Saints, through your Son our Lord Jesus Christ." Amen

Have you read the Catechism of the Catholic Church yet. Might be a good idea.

vatican.va/archive/ENG0015/_INDEX.HTM

Thanks for the prayer! I will try and remember to say it every day!

I have been trying to read the Catechism. I have a copy, it’s just getting time to read it the right way, and being able to understand it. Thanks for your kind words!

 

[Evan395]

Thanks everyone who replied! It really means a lot! I’m glad I found this website, I can see sticking around here for a long time!

God bless!