Question concerning Sexual Morality

[Wisdo44]

I am aware that it is immoral for a man to spill his seed(other than a wetdream) into any place other than his wife’s genitals. Of coarse, otherwise, it would be onanism.

However, my question concerns women. Must a woman reach climax only through penetration or can it be reached through some form of foreplay?

I hope this question isn’t inappropriate for this forum. I apologize if it is. The only reason I ask is because it came up in my moral theology class, and now I’m kind of curious. I can’t trust my teacher’s answers because he’s an extremely liberal theologian (thinks women should be priests and that contraception and homosexuality should be permissible within the Church.)

 

[solarwind23]

Wisdo44:

I am aware that it is immoral for a man to spill his seed(other than a wetdream) into any place other than his wife’s genitals. Of coarse, otherwise, it would be onanism.

However, my question concerns women. Must a woman reach climax only through penetration or can it be reached through some form of foreplay?

I hope this question isn’t inappropriate for this forum. I apologize if it is. The only reason I ask is because it came up in my moral theology class, and now I’m kind of curious. I can’t trust my teacher’s answers because he’s an extremely liberal theologian (thinks women should be priests and that contraception and homosexuality should be permissible within the Church.)

As far as I know a woman can reach climax through virtually anything provided that no seed is spilled and it is in the context of intercourse.

 

[1ke]

Wisdo44:

I am aware that it is immoral for a man to spill his seed(other than a wetdream) into any place other than his wife’s genitals. Of coarse, otherwise, it would be onanism.

However, my question concerns women. Must a woman reach climax only through penetration or can it be reached through some form of foreplay?

I hope this question isn’t inappropriate for this forum. I apologize if it is. The only reason I ask is because it came up in my moral theology class, and now I’m kind of curious. I can’t trust my teacher’s answers because he’s an extremely liberal theologian (thinks women should be priests and that contraception and homosexuality should be permissible within the Church.)

Within the context of a completed marital act, the woman can climax before, during, or after intercourse.

 

[Wisdo44]

Mind if I ask why a woman is allowed to achieve orgasm outside of penetration and a man may not?

 

[Scott_Waddell]

Wisdo44:

Mind if I ask why a woman is allowed to achieve orgasm outside of penetration and a man may not?

Because the women’s eggs (the part that allows new life) stay where they are (orgasm or not). Men’s sperm (the part that allows new life) leave the body as a direct result of orgasm.

 

[Wisdo44]

Scott Waddell:

Because the women’s eggs (the part that allows new life) stay where they are (orgasm or not). Men’s sperm (the part that allows new life) leave the body as a direct result of orgasm.

In that case, why wouldn’t female masturbation be acceptable?

 

[setter]

Wisdo44:

In that case, why wouldn’t female masturbation be acceptable?

It depends upon how and in what context you are defining “female masturbation”. 1ke has already provided a encompassing answer: “Within the context of a completed marital act, the woman can climax before, during, or after intercourse.” Yes, this can entail direct stimulation to the female genitalia.

 

[otm]

Wisdo44:

In that case, why wouldn’t female masturbation be acceptable?

The essence of an act of masturbation is an inward turning, a self-centered act for self pleasure.

The essence of Christianity (ok, part of the essence) is the movement from self-centered-ness to other-centered-ness.

Sin is not anywhere near so much a violation of a specific law as it is a placing of self over God; of being “I” centered instead of “Thou” centered (with apologies to Martin Buber). To look at sin as simply, or no more than, a violation of a specific law is to miss the point and to reduce sin to a legalistic, minimalistic, and emchanical definition.

The Biblical concept of metanoia is a turning around, turning from self to God.

Masturbation is not about being God-centered; it is about being self-centered.

That is why placing it in the context of the marital embrace makes so much sense, as the marital embrace is designed for each partner to give of self to the other.

And probably the best place to look for a longer answer is in JP2’s theology of the Body, in spite of what neo-scholastics may say of it.

 

[kquinn]

A good explanation can be found in “The Good News about Sex and Marriage” by Christopher West (a “Theology of the Body” JPII for dummies of sorts . I lent my copy to my mom and sister, so if any of you can add or clerify any of these points go for it .

As a poster previously stated, a woman’s climax is not something to be sought outside of the marital act. That would distort it’s purpose and it would be done solely for pleasure.

From CCC 2352: "For here sexual pleasure is sought outside of “the sexual relationship which is demanded by the moral order and in which the total meaning of mutual self-giving and human procreation in the context of true love is achieved.”

Mastrubation does not take into account either the aspect of mutual self giving of spouses (since we have established that male mastrubation would be a sin) or the procreative aspect of sexual union. This also applies to why climax for women must take place as a part of the marital act. The husband’s reciprocation, as it were, (again, in the context of sexual union) is a demonstration of his self giving to his wife (and again, Christopher West explains it so much more fully).

Hope this helps, God bless,
k

 

[Celeste88]

setter:

It depends upon how and in what context you are defining “female masturbation”. 1ke has already provided a encompassing answer: “Within the context of a completed marital act, the woman can climax before, during, or after intercourse.” Yes, this can entail direct stimulation to the female genitalia.

How much time must elapse before the woman’s climax is considered outside of the sexual intercourse? Suppose the woman did not climax with her husband, now he is too tired to bring his wife to climax…can they wait till the next day for her to get an orgasm?

 

[otm]

Celeste88:

How much time must elapse before the woman’s climax is considered outside of the sexual intercourse? Suppose the woman did not climax with her husband, now he is too tired to bring his wife to climax…can they wait till the next day for her to get an orgasm?

If she then has one in the context of a marital embrace the next morning.

In other words, he doesn’t stimulate her to climax without making love. Were he to attempt intercourse but not be able to climax, there is the intent to make love, the intent of mutual self giving.

If he is simply manipulating her to the point of climax for the simple point of having her achieve a climax, it would seem at the minimum a paucity of understanding about what making love is about. He is doing little more than assisting her in masturbating. That is not what the marital embrace is about.

Sadly, society (as over abundantly represented by the large majority of women’s magazines in almost any given checkstand at your local grocer) has put so much emphasis on achieving an orgasm that it has removed the orgasm from something part and parcel of the marital act, and reduced it to a slef pleasure end and right. This applies to both parties’ orgasm, or lack thereof. Rather than lovemaking being directed to procreation and the mutual union of husband and wife, it is being directed to achieving orgasms as if they were the sole end. Technique has become the keyword, not self giving.