Questioning my civil marriage

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I have been with my husband 25 years… Civil marriage, sin. He was married in Catholic Church when 18 and divorced by judge of court. Now I keep asking myself what we are doing. I know we are not married in front of God. When we pass we will not be together. So depressed, but I continue to pray. Don’t know what I should do
 
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Has he considered submitting the question of the first marriage to a marriage tribunal to determine its validity?
 
No. He was discouraged when we went for marriage counseling. That is when the Father told us it was not a valid marriage. He refused to help us. Since then he drifted from the church. This was about 18 years ago and does not attend.
 
Have you considered not worrying about it, enjoying the life you have with him, and trusting that God will be merciful?
 
Maybe you could take a look at a couple of websites. One priest’s harsh reply back two decades ago was hurtful, I know that now you can find an advocate who will journey with you.

Your Diocese has a Tribunal office. They will give you the name of trained Advocates. These advocates may be lay people (like me!), deacons, nuns and sometimes priests. If you feel more comfortable with a lay advocate, it is your right to have one.

The websites I’d suggest are catholicsdivorce.org (Rose Sweet has an amazing ministry, fully Catholic and fully compassionate, she is often a guest on Catholic Answers Live) and the US Bishops foryourmarriage.org

Know that God wants you to return to the Sacraments and He will make a way. Pray, hope, and let the Holy Spirit lead you back.

HUGS
 
Platinum said:
I have been with my husband 25 years… Civil marriage, sin. He was married in Catholic Church when 18 and divorced by judge of court. Now I keep asking myself what we are doing. I know we are not married in front of God. When we pass we will not be together. So depressed, but I continue to pray. Don’t know what I should do
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Please make an appointment to talk to your priest. If a priest gave you bad advice or was uncooperative all those years ago, I am so sorry that happened to you. I would encourage you to seek pastoral guidance from your current priest and discuss the situation with him.
 
Please follow 1ke’s advice. Don’t be discouraged. Take heart and have hope. If you do nothing, nothing changes. You clearly long for a sacramental marriage. What harm is there in seeking that end?
 
I’ve heard recently about “Natural Marriage” which is good, and since we don’t know about the validity of his first you might be able to have your marriage blessed. (I suspect the state of our world today, that many people have confusion about this.)

Keep knocking on doors, starting with your parish priest. Ask him for recommendations if he isn’t able to help you. Some of the best things I’ve done was listen to my parish priests!
You will be in my prayers.
 
Thank you all for your kind words. I continue to pray for guidance. At times it is very overwhelming. I am trying to get him back to church. I listen to Catholic Radio and have learned so much. In the beginning of my marriage I was a cradle Catholic. Now I am learning of even more sins I have and was unaware. I will continue with penance and prayer.
 
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