Questions about Annulments

[YoungCatholic86]

Why do we allow annulments when Mark 10:9 says not to? I realize that its supposed to mean the marriage never happened but that doesn’t make sense to me when things like children come into the picture.

Just for the record I am currently and will remain a Catholic. I am not undergoing a crisis of faith or anything like that.

 

[tee_eff_em]

Do children only *come into the picture *as the product of a marriages?

tee

 

[YoungCatholic86]

Do children only *come into the picture *as the product of a marriages?

tee

Good point! But what about the passage from Mark?

 

[Tantum_ergo]

Why do we allow annulments when Mark 10:9 says not to? I realize that its supposed to mean the marriage never happened but that doesn’t make sense to me when things like children come into the picture.

Just for the record I am currently and will remain a Catholic. I am not undergoing a crisis of faith or anything like that.

Actually, a decree of nullity does not mean the marriage ‘never happened.’ It means that at the time of the vows (not during the marriage time itself, however long it lasted) the one or both of the spouses was somehow not free to or not capable of giving a valid consent to the marriage.

That could be in one of several ways. Perhaps the person lied, perhaps he or she was too immature to comprehend the nature of marriage, had a completely wrong understanding, was being ‘forced’ into the marriage and would not have freely chosen, etc.

But the marriage HAPPENED. There was a civil, LEGAL marriage (and any children born of such are perfectly legitimate.)

However despite the legality and all the civil rights etc., there was not a valid SACRAMENT. Marriage is not simply a legal contract, it is ALSO a sacrament. If the sacrament part is not there, the legal part exists (that is why a person who seeks a decree of nullity must be CIVILLY divorced), and that must be dealt with in order to correct the wrong that occurred–what LOOKED like a regular civil/sacramental valid marriage, but which was not so in the eyes of God.

And actually Jesus Himself spoke of a decree of nullity in the (often mistranslated) passage where He says that a person who divorces his wife "Except in the case of ‘lewd conduct’ is at fault. What Jesus means is that a person who IS ‘wrongly married’ MUST do the civil divorce because he is NOT validly married. The so-called ‘lewd conduct’ would be, for example, a man who marries a woman who was validly married and divorced the first husband. That man would contract a civil marriage but the woman is NOT free to marry and thus the second man MUST divorce her in order to stop himself (and her) from committing adultery.

 

[YoungCatholic86]

Thank you both for clarifying

 

[joanofarc2008]

This video has a pretty good language translation that may be helpful for you on this. While it explains the translation in Matthew the Matthew and Mark teaching are parallel. God bless. And don’t mind the hoaky music.

 

[Godfollower]

Why do we allow annulments when Mark 10:9 says not to? I realize that its supposed to mean the marriage never happened but that doesn’t make sense to me when things like children come into the picture.

Just for the record I am currently and will remain a Catholic. I am not undergoing a crisis of faith or anything like that.

Actually, Mark 10:9 does not prohibit annulments (actually “decrees of nullity”); it’s talking about something else entirely.

And the Pharisees coming to him asked him: Is it lawful for a man to put away his wife? tempting him. But he answering, saith to them: What did Moses command you? Who said: Moses permitted to write a bill of divorce, and to put her away. To whom Jesus answering, said: Because of the hardness of your heart he wrote you that precept. But from the beginning of the creation, God made them male and female. For this cause a man shall leave his father and mother; and shall cleave to his wife. And they two shall be in one flesh. Therefore now they are not two, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder.

Mark 10:2-9.

A decree of nullity is a declaration by the Church that God hath not joined them together. Perhaps one of them was already married, or had taken religious vows (decree of nullity granted fairly quickly). Perhaps one of them was under duress or intoxicated (decree of nullity granted after sufficient evidence is brought forward). Or, perhaps one of them was incapable of forming the necessary intent to perform the Sacrament of Matrimony (decree of nullity requires a much more intense investigation).

A decree of nullity addresses the validity of the Sacrament that was allegedly performed on a certain day. It has nothing to do with whether the marriage is valid civilly, and it has nothing to do with the kids.

For example, suppose a boyfriend and girlfriend move in together and have six kids over the course of 20 years, raising them as a family. Are they married in the eyes of the Church? Nope – because they never performed the Sacrament of Matrimony. Well, what if they went through the ceremony but one of them never intended it (let’s say the groom was already married). Now are they married? Still nope – because they never performed the Sacrament of Matrimony.

The Church teaches that you cannot end a valid marriage. Either you are validly married in God’s eyes and cannot get a divorce because ending a marriage is prohibited; or you are not validly married in God’s eyes and cannot get a divorce because there’s nothing to end. A decree of nullity addresses the second scenario.