Reading The Posts

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Recently I have found that many people answer a post without really reading it. They attack the OP, go after the person who has answered the OP with both guns ‘a blazin’ but they haven’t really READ either the ANSWER or the POST.

It has been a real lesson in both humility and reading comprehension for me. I have tried to answer the questions only and often times found myself on the receiving end of some verbal spankings that were not deserved. They have been properly dealt with and I am not whining about those incidents. I have also GIVEN some verbal spankings that were not deserved and had to make some amends! Believe me, I am no angel!

I am, however, wondering - what do you think we need to do as individuals to insure that we are responding correctly to the issues being pesenting on each thread and not responding to the personalities we may dislike - in other words, how to we walk our walk as Catholic Christians, rather than simply talk our talk?

On your mark…get set…GO
 
Well, we can assume the person is sincerely asking a question or means no harm until s/he makes it clear they have an agenda or do mean harm.

I too have been guilty of not reading a post thoroughly enough and gone off half-cocked and on the attack. Usually I fall into that trap when I am tired or in a bad mood. But, generally speaking, I do try to understand what the other person is asking/saying and respond in charity to that.

And I have also been the victim of those who read into my words things I never intended or who gave my post a quick scan and so missed some vital part of it and gone after me, as you say with both guns blazing. All I can do is apologize for not making my self clear enough and ask him/her to reread my post with fresh eyes and perhaps more thoroughly. Usually they do and see I meant no offense and so I make a friend instead of creating an unnecessary enemy.
 
All I can do is apologize for not making my self clear enough and ask him/her to reread my post with fresh eyes and perhaps more thoroughly. Usually they do and see I meant no offense and so I make a friend instead of creating an unnecessary enemy.
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I like this, Della. You have reminded me to ‘turn the other cheek’. that is not always my first choice and yet it should be, in terms of responses. Thank you!
 
Well, my answer has nothing to do with being Christian…but more with reading comprehension…

I try to keep my post short and sweet and to the point instead of rambling…so that people won’t just skip over my posts and loose interest to what I am saying. Also, break up your posts in paragraphs, they are easier to read.

I try my best not to reply to anyone without reading their post a couple of times. I have been known to print out the whole thread so that I can read it easier, especially if it’s something I am REALLY interested in.

That’s my .02
 
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DJgang:
Well, my answer has nothing to do with being Christian…but more with reading comprehension…

I try to keep my post short and sweet and to the point instead of rambling…so that people won’t just skip over my posts and loose interest to what I am saying. Also, break up your posts in paragraphs, they are easier to read.

I try my best not to reply to anyone without reading their post a couple of times. I have been known to print out the whole thread so that I can read it easier, especially if it’s something I am REALLY interested in.

That’s my .02
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and your .02 is well appreciated. I never thought about printing out an entire thread. That would also allow one to not repeat what others are saying, unless you wish to simply ‘bolster’ support for an idea. Thank you.
 
I think I’ll PM you about this topic, LSK. I think it’s a really valuable one!
 
Unfortunately it seems no matter what, you are bound to upset someone and sometimes it doesn’t come from what you posted. Sometimes someone doesn’t like your “signature”. Mine has made more than a few people upset. But I’ll tell you what…I LOVE Starbucks! ~ Kathy ~ :whistle:
 
This is a problem that is not unique to the Catholic Answer’s forum. People have plenty of problems communicating clearly in real life. It can be even more difficult on a message board where there are no physical gestures or tonal inflections. But here are some things I’ve tried (with varying success.)

I use the “hybrid” mode to view the message board. I have a large enough monitor to use 1024x768 pixels. I find the hybrid mode to be the best for seeing how many responses an OP has and how the various posts branch off from each other. I personally think that those who can’t be bothered to read previous post to be rude IF they know how to do so. But I try to remember not everyone is actually, physically seeing what I am seeing.

I don’t respond to all posts just because I have an answer. If the OP already has good responses and I have nothing new to say then why bother? If anything, I may just say “Ditto” to some other post.

I sometimes try to cut and paste individual pieces of the original post and address them one at a time. That sometimes helps me to see things I previously glossed over (or just plain forgot).

I try to make use of the smilies if I am trying communicate a feeling or emotion.

If I suspect the OP is asking something other than what the words seem to indicate I will ask for clarification. Sometimes I haven’t had an answer to offer but the answer to my question will clear up things for other responders who can answer. This works well when I see ‘online fights’ between people who actually have more in common than they realize – they just got stuck on the words.

Some people are touchy/feely types. Others are ‘just the facts’ types. Some sub-forums appeal to one group more than the other. I try to get the feel of the sub-forum and it’s residents before posting. Some people get in trouble because they try to give a touchy/feely answer when a ‘facts’ answer is what is needed. The opposite may also be true. The OP may be looking for one kind of answer when the other is required. I try not to take it personally if they don’t appreciate what they get.

I know that this merely touches the surface of the problem but…
 
I get a strong feeling that some people are not reading at all…
I hope if people want to respond to something that interests them that they please read the thread!
 
One thing to keep this in check is to abandon any agendas one brings to forum participation.

Sometimes I think people answer the question they want to answer instead of the one asked. It gives them the opportunity to appear knowledgable and maybe a little morally superior.

What ever conclusions come from this thread they might be added to this one.
 
My most recent problem has been someone “chopping up” the post and then making comments without fully reading what was said, To take one or two words out of context and harp on it over and over. But I learn the hard way, not to respond after you try to explain and then they pick apart again, your second response. My new rule of thumb, don’t respond more then 2X to someone who is trying to pick a fight.
 
Firing of an answer before really understanding the question is easy to do both in actual conversation and in discussion forums. Sometimes I find that my initial impression of a poster is wrong. The OP will ask a question which seems to me to be an attack or sarcasm. Then, after a few people post good replies, the OP says something like “Thanks for the answer, now I get it.” And I’ll say to myself, “Oh, they were serious. Good thing I didn’t post a sarcastic reply.” Being a cradle Catholic who’s had the Baltimore Catechism pounded into my skull, I have to remind myself that not everyone comes from that background.
 
I would agree that it may be the Cardinals and Yankees in the World Series…oh wait, that is not what we are talking about :ehh:

What were we talking about?

:rotfl:
 
Mirror Mirror:
I would agree that it may be the Cardinals and Yankees in the World Series…oh wait, that is not what we are talking about :ehh:

What were we talking about?

:rotfl:
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Yankees!! 👍
~ Kathy~
 
Mirror Mirror:
I would agree that it may be the Cardinals and Yankees in the World Series…oh wait, that is not what we are talking about :ehh:

What were we talking about?

:rotfl:
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YOU are so funny…

thank you, 👍
 
I really want to thank everyone who has responded. I have been reminded to read thoroughly all the posts and to try and remember that tone of voice cannot be heard when someone is posting. I have also been reminded of internet etiquette, i.e. to avoid using all capital letters when posting as that is considered ‘yelling’.

I think, one of my biggest challenges, is to remember to follow Christ’s teachings when responding to someone who seems to be ( in my opinion ) whining, or making a mountain out of a molehill, or just plain disagreeing with my incredibly wise and wonderful advise. I need to remember that there is value in everyone’s experience and that some people have no one in their lives to turn to but the ‘family’ they have found right here on CAF.

I have learned so much from the Apologetics of CAF. I have made some good friends and I have met some real characters. You have all taught me to more closely walk the walk of a Catholic Christian woman, and I am thanking you for that every day!
 
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LSK:
I really want to thank everyone who has responded. I have been reminded to read thoroughly all the posts and to try and remember that tone of voice cannot be heard when someone is posting. I think, one of my biggest challenges, is to remember to follow Christ’s teachings when responding to someone who seems to be ( in my opinion ) whining, or making a mountain out of a molehill, or just plain disagreeing with my incredibly wise and wonderful advise".
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Some of us would NEVER disagree with your “incredibly wise and wonderful advise”!! :bowdown:
 
Mirror Mirror:
I would agree that it may be the Cardinals and Yankees in the World Series…oh wait, that is not what we are talking about :ehh:

What were we talking about?

:rotfl:
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How about those Mets:D The who???:whacky: This is a sports thread right…???
 
I do think it’s only normal for folks to read any post, and determine what the OP means, even though it might be completely off the subject entirely. It is only normal too, to answer, when one has absolutely NO idea of what the OP meant. Hey–this is the web–a Mass of confusion. Doesn’t everyone know this already? What is new here OP?, I do ask? Why all the ta-doo about it? This is a given, in today’s new technology, of “no-relationships”…😦

Yes, some folks get upset, and feel so misinterpreted, misunderstood, etc., hey this, hey that, Oh my feelings were hurt, "this is not at all what I meant, etc., "this guy said this, this lady said that, etc., gosh, “she was reported”, "he was reported, etc., OK? etc., “I’m so upset with this person, that person”. Ouch.!!! Well let’s get real here. Get thinking as mature adults, if at all possible. This is the web for ya! There is nothing new under the sun here. Can we all get over it? and move on? Exhibit the Christian traits Jesus calls us all to???

I just hope that here, at least on the CA forums, we can ALL exhibit charity in all our responses, and try anyway, to be loving, even though someone ruffles our personal feathers. We just must exhibit the Love of Christ, IF we have it in us, that is. Perhaps some don’t. So they need the forums all the more. Can we help them? Forget ourselves for one minute and spread God’s Love? Can we try? Everyone has a right to their views, their opinions, let’s not forget. Everyone is speaking from only THEIR own experience. And that God Loves us ALL. Can we try to be charitable?

In Christ,
Sparkle:)
Praise God~~ Let’s make this forum a place for comfort, for Truth.
🙂
 
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sparkle:
I do think it’s only normal for folks to read any post, and determine what the OP means, even though it might be completely off the subject entirely. It is only normal too, to answer, when one has absolutely NO idea of what the OP meant. Hey–this is the web–a Mass of confusion. Doesn’t everyone know this already? What is new here OP?, I do ask? Why all the ta-doo about it? This is a given, in today’s new technology, of “no-relationships”…😦

Yes, some folks get upset, and feel so misinterpreted, misunderstood, etc., hey this, hey that, Oh my feelings were hurt, "this is not at all what I meant, etc., "this guy said this, this lady said that, etc., gosh, “she was reported”, "he was reported, etc., OK? etc., “I’m so upset with this person, that person”. Ouch.!!! Well let’s get real here. Get thinking as mature adults, if at all possible. This is the web for ya! There is nothing new under the sun here. Can we all get over it? and move on? Exhibit the Christian traits Jesus calls us all to???

I just hope that here, at least on the CA forums, we can ALL exhibit charity in all our responses, and try anyway, to be loving, even though someone ruffles our personal feathers. We just must exhibit the Love of Christ, IF we have it in us, that is. Perhaps some don’t. So they need the forums all the more. Can we help them? Forget ourselves for one minute and spread God’s Love? Can we try? Everyone has a right to their views, their opinions, let’s not forget. Everyone is speaking from only THEIR own experience. And that God Loves us ALL. Can we try to be charitable?

In Christ,
Sparkle:)
Praise God~~ Let’s make this forum a place for comfort, for Truth.
🙂
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With all due respect, and in all love and charity…

huh???:confused:
 
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