G
GoldenArrow
Guest
I have a friend at church who has appointed herself the Parish’s policewoman, taking upon her self the task of rebuking everyone, molding the Parish into her idea of perfection…
I once sent her a harsh email, telling her that she was acting like a Pharisee, judging others when she herself has glaring faults that she is either unaware of or denies. One of her major flaws is pride and rash judgment. She has, in effect, a classic Pharisaical Conscience.
My rebuke had no effect. She laughed it off. To her, I’m just a kid.
She is one of those people who likes to blow a trumpet every time she does a good work. She goes to daily Mass, says her rosary every day, in public. She’s involved in prayer groups, bible studies. One cannot say that she’s not devout. I just think that perhaps she does some of these activities, not out of charity for God, but to display her religiousity to others in the manner of a Peacock.
Let me give some examples:
She regularly corrects people for whispering in the chapel when she herself sometimes whispers in the chapel (usually when asking me something). The last time she corrected someone, she did so by whacking her missal on the pew very loudly! Very immature.
She yells at the lectors for accidentally reading Scripture incorrectly, when, the one time she filled in as lector, she accidentally, read the WRONG scripture reading entirely.
She corrected the Deacon after Mass when he mispronounced the last name of Takeri Tekawithika. She, of course, knows how to pronounce this name in the authentic Native American tongue. HA! The poor deacon, who was just getting over heart surgery, just shook his head.
She even rebukes people in the Sunday prayer group for, as she puts it, “Not doing their job in mitigating these storms [hurricanes]. The Divine Mercy Chaplet needs to be said every day, not just at your own whim. Blah blah.” The person she targeted (wasn’t me) is a very nice, devout, woman who does a heck of a lot of work in the Church. Unlike my friend, this other woman does works without the pomp and circumstance…
My friend yelled at a guy during morning Rosary for praying too loudly! And he went up to her after Mass that morning, whispered something in her ear in reply (something unkind), and she gets up (just before Mass is about to begin) and in front of the Priest starts yelling at him. I befriended this man after this. I think he should pray even louder!
She even yelled at me last week for not being involved in official Church Ministries, that I represent the servant who buried his talents in Christ’s Parable. Granted. I’m not as much of a busy body as she (only because I’m sick a lot), but I do goto Mass three days a week and I pray a lot. I do what I can. I am more of a contemplative, Carmelite style. I do lots works, but I don’t blow a trumpet. I do a lot of evangelization on the Internet, a hidden work due to anonymity. I told her that I do a lot that she doesn’t know about and to please leave me alone.
Now, I am thinking of rebuking her again. What I’m asking of you is this: do you have any good articles about the proper way to go about “correcting” sinful behavor or “rebuking” someone? This article IS NOT for me, but would be something I could give her to read. She obviously needs some instruction.
Hence, the reason for posting this in the Apologetics Section.
If you have any article, just link them please.
She’s making people in our parish miserable. Instead of converting people, she makes them angry! I’m her closest friend, so I should be the one to whack her on the head, again. I just need a good source of information.
Don’t get me wrong. She has good qualities, like the ability to forgive. I was surprise she forgave me after my last rebuke! So … she’s not entirely nasty.
Thanks!
I once sent her a harsh email, telling her that she was acting like a Pharisee, judging others when she herself has glaring faults that she is either unaware of or denies. One of her major flaws is pride and rash judgment. She has, in effect, a classic Pharisaical Conscience.
My rebuke had no effect. She laughed it off. To her, I’m just a kid.
She is one of those people who likes to blow a trumpet every time she does a good work. She goes to daily Mass, says her rosary every day, in public. She’s involved in prayer groups, bible studies. One cannot say that she’s not devout. I just think that perhaps she does some of these activities, not out of charity for God, but to display her religiousity to others in the manner of a Peacock.
Let me give some examples:
She regularly corrects people for whispering in the chapel when she herself sometimes whispers in the chapel (usually when asking me something). The last time she corrected someone, she did so by whacking her missal on the pew very loudly! Very immature.
She yells at the lectors for accidentally reading Scripture incorrectly, when, the one time she filled in as lector, she accidentally, read the WRONG scripture reading entirely.
She corrected the Deacon after Mass when he mispronounced the last name of Takeri Tekawithika. She, of course, knows how to pronounce this name in the authentic Native American tongue. HA! The poor deacon, who was just getting over heart surgery, just shook his head.
She even rebukes people in the Sunday prayer group for, as she puts it, “Not doing their job in mitigating these storms [hurricanes]. The Divine Mercy Chaplet needs to be said every day, not just at your own whim. Blah blah.” The person she targeted (wasn’t me) is a very nice, devout, woman who does a heck of a lot of work in the Church. Unlike my friend, this other woman does works without the pomp and circumstance…
My friend yelled at a guy during morning Rosary for praying too loudly! And he went up to her after Mass that morning, whispered something in her ear in reply (something unkind), and she gets up (just before Mass is about to begin) and in front of the Priest starts yelling at him. I befriended this man after this. I think he should pray even louder!
She even yelled at me last week for not being involved in official Church Ministries, that I represent the servant who buried his talents in Christ’s Parable. Granted. I’m not as much of a busy body as she (only because I’m sick a lot), but I do goto Mass three days a week and I pray a lot. I do what I can. I am more of a contemplative, Carmelite style. I do lots works, but I don’t blow a trumpet. I do a lot of evangelization on the Internet, a hidden work due to anonymity. I told her that I do a lot that she doesn’t know about and to please leave me alone.
Now, I am thinking of rebuking her again. What I’m asking of you is this: do you have any good articles about the proper way to go about “correcting” sinful behavor or “rebuking” someone? This article IS NOT for me, but would be something I could give her to read. She obviously needs some instruction.
Hence, the reason for posting this in the Apologetics Section.
If you have any article, just link them please.
She’s making people in our parish miserable. Instead of converting people, she makes them angry! I’m her closest friend, so I should be the one to whack her on the head, again. I just need a good source of information.
Don’t get me wrong. She has good qualities, like the ability to forgive. I was surprise she forgave me after my last rebuke! So … she’s not entirely nasty.
Thanks!