receiving the eucharist

[garyjknoll]

I am a “cradle Catholic” who has returned to the faith recently. I was widowed 5 years ago and remarried another cradle Catholic. She is divorced from an extremely abusive husband. Although I attend Mass regularly, say the rosary daily and spend many evenings in Eucharistic Adorations at my churchs’ chapel, she will not consider attending Mass with me nor will she consider having her marriage annulled so that our marriage can be blessed by the Catholic Church. My question is this: should I not receive the Holy Eucharist because my new marriage has not been blessed by the Church?

I would greatly appreciate the opinion of an apologist on this matter.

Yours in Him,
Gary

 

[LilyM]

I am a “cradle Catholic” who has returned to the faith recently. I was widowed 5 years ago and remarried another cradle Catholic. She is divorced from an extremely abusive husband. Although I attend Mass regularly, say the rosary daily and spend many evenings in Eucharistic Adorations at my churchs’ chapel, she will not consider attending Mass with me nor will she consider having her marriage annulled so that our marriage can be blessed by the Catholic Church. My question is this: should I not receive the Holy Eucharist because my new marriage has not been blessed by the Church?

I would greatly appreciate the opinion of an apologist on this matter.

Yours in Him,
Gary

The best place to go is the ‘Ask an Apologist’ section where CAF’s staff apologists can answer your question.

 

[Br.Rich_SFO]

I am a “cradle Catholic” who has returned to the faith recently. I was widowed 5 years ago and remarried another cradle Catholic. She is divorced from an extremely abusive husband. Although I attend Mass regularly, say the rosary daily and spend many evenings in Eucharistic Adorations at my churchs’ chapel, she will not consider attending Mass with me nor will she consider having her marriage annulled so that our marriage can be blessed by the Catholic Church. My question is this: should I not receive the Holy Eucharist because my new marriage has not been blessed by the Church?

I would greatly appreciate the opinion of an apologist on this matter.

Yours in Him,
Gary

You need to speak with your pastor on the matter. Generally speaking a person who is remarried after civil divorce or marries a person who has divorced and has not obtained a decree of nullity neither can receive Holy Communion until the Marriage situation is resolved.

 

[Matas]

My question is this: should I not receive the Holy Eucharist because my new marriage has not been blessed by the Church?

I just had my marriage blessed last Saturday. Before that time, I couldn’t receive the Holy Eucharist. This might weigh on you heavily, so after reading those CA tracts, go talk to your priest. You’ll be in my prayers, bro…

 

[Brooklyn]

I’m not an apologist, so you can take that into consideration. But having just returned to the Church and needing to have my marriage convalidated because I was not married in the Church, I have some experience with this.

Assuming you did not marry in the Church, it would seem that unless your wife will agree to have your marriage convalidated, you cannot receive communion. As others have said, you need to speak with your priest. But here is a link that might be helpful.

catholicdoors.com/faq/qu64.htm#answer3

Mary

 

[Pious_Mat]

In trying the gain the participation of your wife in this matter, perhaps you should try to get the bottom of why she doesn’t want to annull her marriage. Is it because of bad memories of her previous husband? Does she fear seeing him again? Or has she lost her faith, and wants nothing to do with the Church.

This is a complication question. Not only do you need to express to her how important this is to you, but also try to understand her feelings. As was previously suggested, seeing your priest about this is imperative, and if what you learn of her unwillingness takes such a turn, perhaps a councillor.

I know what it’s like to be the only one who practises the faith in the household, so I’m praying for you, and hoping that do the same for me.

Mat.

 

[Scotty_PGH]

I am a “cradle Catholic” who has returned to the faith recently. I was widowed 5 years ago and remarried another cradle Catholic. She is divorced from an extremely abusive husband. Although I attend Mass regularly, say the rosary daily and spend many evenings in Eucharistic Adorations at my churchs’ chapel, she will not consider attending Mass with me nor will she consider having her marriage annulled so that our marriage can be blessed by the Catholic Church. My question is this: should I not receive the Holy Eucharist because my new marriage has not been blessed by the Church?

I would greatly appreciate the opinion of an apologist on this matter.

Yours in Him,
Gary

Speak to your priest and ask him about a sanatio in radice “Healing at the root,” otherwise known as a “sanation.” This is the way to formalize your marriage in the eyes of the Church when one party is unwilling. If your priest is unaware of this process, contact the diocese.

 

[jmcrae]

Perhaps your wife has some misunderstandings about the Declaration of Nullity; what it is, or how it works.

The simplest way is to ask her what she thinks it means.

 

[Brooklyn]

Since your wife’s ex-husband was abusive, she should have no problem at all in obtaining a nullification of her marriage. I will pray for you and her. But please, do speak with your priest. He will be able to give you the guidance you need.

Mary

 

[Br.Rich_SFO]

Speak to your priest and ask him about a sanatio in radice “Healing at the root,” otherwise known as a “sanation.” This is the way to formalize your marriage in the eyes of the Church when one party is unwilling. If your priest is unaware of this process, contact the diocese.

“sanatio in radice” has a narrow application and would only generally apply to defects not requiring the Annulment process. For instance it might apply if a prior spouse has died freeing a person to enter another Marriage, which was originally entered into invalidly because of the prior Marriage.

 

[Scotty_PGH]

“sanatio in radice” has a narrow application and would only generally apply to defects not requiring the Annulment process. For instance it might apply if a prior spouse has died freeing a person to enter another Marriage, which was originally entered into invalidly because of the prior Marriage.

Sanatio in radice allows the marriage to be blessed by the Church as long as one spouse wishes it to be so, and the other does not object. I don’t think the application is very narrow at all. The poster, though, should speak with his priest to get more valuable guidance than one can find on an internet message board.

 

[jmcrae]

The poster, though, should speak with his priest to get more valuable guidance than one can find on an internet message board.

I definitely agree with this. Also, he should contact his local Marriage Tribunal at the earliest possible opportunity - his parish priest can refer him.

 

[jmcrae]

Since your wife’s ex-husband was abusive, she should have no problem at all in obtaining a nullification of her marriage. I will pray for you and her. But please, do speak with your priest. He will be able to give you the guidance you need.

Mary

I’m nitpicking here, but the Church actually has no power to “nullify” a marriage. All it can do is see whether the marriage actually existed in the first place, or not.

But, unless she knew ahead of time that her former spouse was going to be abusive, and then married him anyway, the chances are good that they will find that she was not marrying the person she thought she was marrying, and thus, no marriage actually existed. (And if she did marry him anyway after knowing that he was abusive, they can call into question her state of mind - did she feel that she had no choice but to marry him? Was she in her right mind? Did she think she was going to change him? and find in her favour that way, too.)