Reclaiming lost Catholics

  • Thread starter Thread starter paul_c
  • Start date Start date
Status
Not open for further replies.
P

paul_c

Guest
One of the bigger problems in the Catholic world today is that there are huge numbers of “Catholics” who don’t participate in the sacraments at all, rarely or never going to mass. I’m not talking about those that find a religious practice more to their liking, I’m talking about those that for whatever reason just stop participating. I’m teaching an 8th Grade confirmation class and only one student (my son) out of 15 attends mass on a regular basis. There parents care enough to get them confirmed but not enough to actually bring them to mass. In our parish, about a third of the registered parishioners attend mass on a given weekend. How do we reach these lost Catholics?
 
I don’t think that there is ever no reason, even if just disinterest, and I wish I knew the answer. You can give the example of living your Catholc faith the best you can…but they think it’s just your “thing”. All I know to do, is pray for them
 
paul_c said:
One of the bigger problems in the Catholic world today is that there are huge numbers of “Catholics” who don’t participate in the sacraments at all, rarely or never going to mass. I’m not talking about those that find a religious practice more to their liking, I’m talking about those that for whatever reason just stop participating. I’m teaching an 8th Grade confirmation class and only one student (my son) out of 15 attends mass on a regular basis. There parents care enough to get them confirmed but not enough to actually bring them to mass. In our parish, about a third of the registered parishioners attend mass on a given weekend. How do we reach these lost Catholics?
Click to expand...
That’s a problem I have in my own family, my husband and adult son hardly ever go to Mass.:o
My husband I have no control, but I never neglected my son as far as his Catholic education was concerned, I attend Mass every week and Holy Day, recieve the Sacraments often, I tried to set a good example…
My other children, and grandchildren do attend Mass, I did go something right.
 
Karen1960 said:
That’s a problem I have in my own family, my husband and adult son hardly ever go to Mass.:o
My husband I have no control, but I never neglected my son as far as his Catholic education was concerned, I attend Mass every week and Holy Day, recieve the Sacraments often, I tried to set a good example…
My other children, and grandchildren do attend Mass, I did go something right.
Click to expand...
When we first got married, my wife wasn’t attending mass, but I convinced her that if she didn’t go, it would give our kids mixed messages and that it was important to me that they attend mass. She agreed and over the years, regained her faith. It has never been an issue since.

I am very sensitive to this particular point. I have all those kids in my ccd class, whose parents don’t go to mass. I keep trying to figure out a nice way to say that if they are really interested in having their kids learn the faith, they should practice it themselves. When they don’t, they are giving their children the message that their faith is not really important. That’s really hard to overcome as a teacher.
 
paul_c said:
. I’m teaching an 8th Grade confirmation class and only one student (my son) out of 15 attends mass on a regular basis.
Click to expand...
Some suggestions. Begin each class with 3 to 5 minutes enthusiastic comments about the Holy Sacrifice of the Mass. Then go immediately into the topic.

Kindly suggest to the pastor to preach Transubstantiation to the “choir.” Remember it is the people who are present who are in contact with those absent.

Start some form of Eucharistic Adoration. If you already have it, make short visits. Get someone to come with you, etc.

I think you get the idea…

Blessings,
grannymh
 
I think all churches are having these problems, One idea i suggested to our priest is to invite the parents in for coffee and donuts or what ever they would like. This saves them money for gas also. Ask the parents what can we do to keep you coming back to mass, what would u like to hear. Or maybe there is something out there that would interest them as in coming every week.

Another way to bring them back is to have a family movie nite. This way the ones who dont come can come see what the parish is doing with the youth. And hopefully they will come back.

Do different things with the youth ( all ages) and word will pass by mouth guarentee. They will start coming back. MY opinion.

halos
 
paul_c said:
When we first got married, my wife wasn’t attending mass, but I convinced her that if she didn’t go, it would give our kids mixed messages and that it was important to me that they attend mass. She agreed and over the years, regained her faith. It has never been an issue since.

I am very sensitive to this particular point. I have all those kids in my ccd class, whose parents don’t go to mass. I keep trying to figure out a nice way to say that if they are really interested in having their kids learn the faith, they should practice it themselves. When they don’t, they are giving their children the message that their faith is not really important. That’s really hard to overcome as a teacher.
Click to expand...
A friend of mine who serves as DRE at a local parish designed a plan to help alleviate this situation a bit: All parents of those students beyond the 2nd grade who are preparing for First Holy Communion must likewise attend classes of instruction in the Faith. With enough teachers, this could be expanded to the parents of all students receiving instruction.
 
One-on-one, people need to be challenged, inspired, helped and re-evangelized. It takes the support from the parish priest and all the lay educators and those involved in apostolic and devotional work. It’s a matter of going down the list and giving people a call – inviting them to a parish event (dinner, Catholic movie, festival for a saint’s day, etc) – and befriending them. When trust is built, then the stronger invitations (nudges, reminders) that they need to go to Mass and Confession and bring their kids.

Obviously, this takes much, much work and a lot of focus from a dedicated group of volunteers – again, with the support of the pastor (ideally).

But there’s no doubt – lapsed Catholics are a major problem for us. The way to reach them is difficult – some need more mercy, others more of God’s justice (reminders of the consequences).

The pamphlet Pillar of Truth, Pillar of Fire by Catholic Answers is a big help. This should be distributed to every registered family in the parish.
catholic.com/library/Pillar.asp

I think there are other good pamphlets, maybe more for lax Catholics. Can anybody suggest one? (I am looking around for this very thing myself). Thanks.
 
FCEGM said:
A friend of mine who serves as DRE at a local parish designed a plan to help alleviate this situation a bit: All parents of those students beyond the 2nd grade who are preparing for First Holy Communion must likewise attend classes of instruction in the Faith. With enough teachers, this could be expanded to the parents of all students receiving instruction.
Click to expand...
How was it recieved by the parishioners? I can imagine that if the parents aren’t willing to spend time to go to Mass, that being forced to take classes must have been negatively recieved. In our parish under our preivious pastor, students in sacramental years (2nd and 8th grades, for us) had to submit cards at mass each week to demonstrate that they went to mass. If they didn’t attend mass (I think they were given 3 times they could miss but that wan’t publicized), they couldn’t recieve the sacraments. That at least insured that they had the experience of mass and most parents went with them, although some brazenly dropped them off and picked them up. I can’t help but believe that some parents came back to church because of that program, but it was dropped by our new pastor.
 
you reach them one family at a time, and usually the occasion of the child’s sacramental preparation is the golden moment because you have a captive audience for parent meetings and other sessions where you can address the parents directly. This invitation should come from the pastor and should include a welcome back to Mass and the sacraments, special opportunities for confession, and above all non-threatening invitation for pastoral counsel to resolve marriage and family issues that are a barrier to the sacraments. Very often when the child has been well taught he evangelizes the family. I see it every year and it is the best part of my job. You, the catechist are critical in this. Your job is to primarily reach and teach the child, and to invite the parents back to Mass when you encounter them. The Holy Spirit works as He will but many are called and few respond.

In this diocese 3 meetings, 2 hours each, are required of parents and sponsors for each sacrament for which the child is preparing. We are not allowed to use any means to track Mass attendance but must repeat forcefully that a child who is not attending Mass is not properly disposed for the sacrament. We are also not allowed to refuse the sacraments to a child who is otherwise properly disposed, simply on the basis that parents did not attend meetings. Any decision like that can only be made by the pastor, who will inform the parents in writing why the sacrament is being delayed (not denied) and what steps must be taken to ready the child.
 
paul_c said:
How was it recieved by the parishioners? I can imagine that if the parents aren’t willing to spend time to go to Mass, that being forced to take classes must have been negatively recieved. In our parish under our preivious pastor, students in sacramental years (2nd and 8th grades, for us) had to submit cards at mass each week to demonstrate that they went to mass. If they didn’t attend mass (I think they were given 3 times they could miss but that wan’t publicized), they couldn’t recieve the sacraments. That at least insured that they had the experience of mass and most parents went with them, although some brazenly dropped them off and picked them up. I can’t help but believe that some parents came back to church because of that program, but it was dropped by our new pastor.
Click to expand...
She has told me that it’s been well received; the parish isn’t very large, so it is more manageable than would be possible in other parishes.
 
You will have to find it used at Amazon or another place that sells used books, but, pick up a copy of “Converting the Baptized”.
 
kage_ar said:
You will have to find it used at Amazon or another place that sells used books, but, pick up a copy of “Converting the Baptized”.
Click to expand...
Thanks - that looks good.

How about something we can give out to those prospects? A small book or something like the Pillar of Truth pamphlet?
 
paul_c said:
One of the bigger problems in the Catholic world today is that there are huge numbers of “Catholics” who don’t participate in the sacraments at all, rarely or never going to mass. I’m not talking about those that find a religious practice more to their liking, I’m talking about those that for whatever reason just stop participating. I’m teaching an 8th Grade confirmation class and only one student (my son) out of 15 attends mass on a regular basis. There parents care enough to get them confirmed but not enough to actually bring them to mass. In our parish, about a third of the registered parishioners attend mass on a given weekend. How do we reach these lost Catholics?
Click to expand...
Our Confirmation candidates have to sign into Church each week or bring a bulletin from a different parish if they went to mass there. We also have a good set of questions that they have all year to research and find answers to… alot of the questions deal with the local parish so they know who does what ministry and what each ministry does. We also teach them what this choice of confirmation is all about and they have to pass a test.

Here is a sample of a few questions from the list:
  1. What is the weekend Mass schedule at your parish? Are there any special features at any of the Masses?
  2. List the religious services (besides Masses) which are held in your parish each week, and the times of each.
  3. When are weekday Masses celebrated in your parish?
  4. When is the sacrament of reconciliation celebrated communally in your parish? When are there opportunities for the individual celebration of reconciliation (confession)?
*5. *Give the name of the bishop in your diocese. Where does he live?
 
BlestOne said:
Our Confirmation candidates have to sign into Church each week or bring a bulletin from a different parish if they went to mass there. We also have a good set of questions that they have all year to research and find answers to… alot of the questions deal with the local parish so they know who does what ministry and what each ministry does. We also teach them what this choice of confirmation is all about and they have to pass a test.

Here is a sample of a few questions from the list:
  1. What is the weekend Mass schedule at your parish? Are there any special features at any of the Masses?
  2. List the religious services (besides Masses) which are held in your parish each week, and the times of each.
  3. When are weekday Masses celebrated in your parish?
  4. When is the sacrament of reconciliation celebrated communally in your parish? When are there opportunities for the individual celebration of reconciliation (confession)?
*5. *Give the name of the bishop in your diocese. Where does he live?
Click to expand...
These are good ideas. As I said in a previous post, our parish used to do the sign in / bring a bulletin from a parish you visited thing but then we changed pastors and the new one thought it took away from the parent’s responsibility.

I’ve been toying with the idea that I need to turn my student’s into evangelists in their own family because evangelism is one of the precepts of the church, after all. I think I will ask them this week to think about what they could do to bring their parent’s back to the church. It will be interesting to see what they say. If anyone has any thoughts about this, I would appreciate it…

I’ve also talked to our religious Ed director about having the parents come in to the end of our confirmation retreat to at least come to Mass…
 
I recall having a meeting at the beginning of Confirmation prep for the parents and kids where we were told that the kids HAD to go to mass but it ultimately fell on the students because if their family didn’t go to mass… they could call for rides from friends.

Also… Do you guys have community service for the candidates? It is a good way to introduce them to lay ministries…

I like your idea of evangelizing the families by the students…

If you would like more on the questions just pm me and I will see if I can find the full list…
 
BlestOne said:
I recall having a meeting at the beginning of Confirmation prep for the parents and kids where we were told that the kids HAD to go to mass but it ultimately fell on the students because if their family didn’t go to mass… they could call for rides from friends.

Also… Do you guys have community service for the candidates? It is a good way to introduce them to lay ministries…

I like your idea of evangelizing the families by the students…

If you would like more on the questions just pm me and I will see if I can find the full list…
Click to expand...
Yes, we do have community service requirements, but our pastor is very hesitant to link the kids up with the church ministries because of Safe environment concerns.

I actually had a meeting with the Pastor to try to get him to understand that the community service hour requirement was a great way to get the students involved in the Chruch ministries. He wanted to go slow so I was only able to create some raking parties for the students. I guess that’s a start but I want to do more. Any suggestions that you might have, I will happily consider. Including how to motivate my overworked pastor to allow us to take on more…
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Back
Top