Relationship???

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strengthinfaith

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Hello there,

I would like to say that I am new to this website and am looking for help/advice. I’m kind of lost right now and I don’t really know where to turn to. I was dating my best friend (of 7 years) for at least two months, she decided that we shouldn’t be together because of what she said that I “deserve better.” I don’t really know why she thinks that way, but she did say that I should be with a girl that believes in god, because she doesn’t have any religious faith/background. We haven’t been talking for about a week now, and even though I’ve been trying to stay busy and keep my mind occupied the thought of her still pops in my head. I miss talking to her, and also holding her in my arms, but I know that me and her isn’t going to workout because of the lack of faith within her. I want to call her, but I don’t want to give her the satisfaction of her having me in her life just as a friend, well not yet not right now. Well I guess my question is that should I still pursue her, or should I just let it be and wait until someone else comes along.
 
That’s pretty rough…

She may think you deserve better because she made some mistake. That could be it, but then it might not be. However, if she feels like you deserve better, then she might not know how much she actually means to you.

If that’s the case, I’d write it all down and show it to her or just tell her.

But since she said that you deserve someone who believes in God, she may just be telling you that you are too religious for her.

But then she also may feel like she CAN’T be religious. Perhaps you can direct her and help her with her lack of faith. I wouldn’t handle it personally, but I’d instead give her a book or direct her to a counselor or something.

It sounds to me like you need some sort of closure. Telling her your feelings and explaining the reasons behind them might give you that in some way. It may not be in the way you hope for, but then again it might be.

I won’t presume to know everything about this, but keep in mind that things happen for a reason. There may be some hidden purpose behind this that will benefit you in the long run.

Be careful with the thought of not giving her the satisfaction of being just her friend. I’m simply guessing…but it sounds like you feel slightly bitter and perhaps resentful towards her for hurting you like that. The best advice I can give is to be calm and collected when thoughts like that enter your mind. I can’t say I wouldn’t think the same way, but its still important to keep your cool.

But get some closure. It sounds like she’s leaving you hanging by a thread.

Perhaps her lack of faith isn’t just in God, but in herself.
 
I “deserve better.”
Click to expand...
here are polite, but transparent directions to the dumpster.

how does a best friend of 7 years NOT know her best friend should be with a believer? wasn’t she paying attention?

you need better best friends, too.
 
Hey I went through a very similar situation a few years ago. I was best friends with a girl and we started dating and about 2 months after she broke up with me. She wasn’t catholic or even religious which at the time didn’t bother me. In my eyes, she was the perfect girl for me and I thought I’d never get over her. But I now realize that God would not want me to date/marry a girl that didn’t believe in him and while being single, I’ve grown a lot in faith and now look forward to meeting a girl that God chooses, not me…For really good advice, go to chastity.com where you can get great answers from great young catholic people on dating, marriage and sex.

Hope this helps!
 
God, I hate it when religion gets in the way of relationships. :mad:

Well, I think the best thing to do is just wait… not necessarily for that “someone else”, but wait for her to come back. If she does, then that must mean she really does want to be with you… because–I’m not gonna lie-- I’m not buying that “you deserve better” ****. 🤷

If she doesn’t come back, then there shouldn’t be much worry about. If that happens–God forbid-- don’t dwell on it; learn from the experience. 😉

I really am sorry that you lost a friend because of this, though. I am no stranger to that situation.

Ironically Yours, Blade and Blood
 
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