Religious Vocations for Husbands or Wives?

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Geremia

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I am curious: are husbands or wives called to religious vocations, e.g., to be a deacon, oblate, or something else? What other religious vocations could a husband or wife have, and are they common? Thanks
 
Yes, a married man can be called to the permanent diaconate, and either a man or woman can be called to be an oblate or third order of a religious community. Off the top of my head I can’t think of anything that’s vocational, but you can also be called to various lay services like Knights of Columbus, various Confraternities, lectering, serving as an Extraordinary Minister of Holy Communion.
 
I cannot actually speak of a secular order besides the Order of Camel, Discalced Secular (OCDS). It is a vocation. A vocation is a gift from God. The Friars, the Nuns and the Seculars are all Camelites. The OCDS are an integral part of the order; not an auxilary, not 2nd class members, but true members of the order. God must call; it’s not just folk who are interested in Carmel, but a true vocation that we must discern–and practice.
 
I think we are missing the most obvious of all - the Religious Vocation they have already been called to - Husband and Wife - the Metaphor for Church and Christ. We must be very careful not to discount that. Not saying anyone was I think it is great if married persons can give more but not a loss of their primary vocation.
 
joanofarc2008 said:
I think we are missing the most obvious of all - the Religious Vocation they have already been called to - Husband and Wife - the Metaphor for Church and Christ. We must be very careful not to discount that. Not saying anyone was I think it is great if married persons can give more but not a loss of their primary vocation.
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Yes, of course. I ask because I have a friend whose father is a deacon, which has struck me as somewhat strange because I’ve thought it could result in a diminishing of “of their primary vocation” of marriage or the vocation to be a deacon. They seem divided. I guess I don’t understand why one can be married and become a deacon.
 
Geremia said:
Yes, of course. I ask because I have a friend whose father is a deacon, which has struck me as somewhat strange because I’ve thought it could result in a diminishing of “of their primary vocation” of marriage or the vocation to be a deacon. They seem divided. I guess I don’t understand why one can be married and become a deacon.
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I think it is important to note that when a married man becomes a deacon - the wife also goes through formation with him, so do his children if they are minor children. If the wife does not give her permission for this - it stops. So if at any time it stops being unitive or detracts from the primary vocation then this most likely is not his calling.
 
Someone else mentioned religious order’s “third orders;” specifically the Carmelites. The Dominicans do this too, one can be a single or married lay person to join. One’s marital vocation remains the state-of-life vocation, but one is part of the Dominican community, must regularly meet, pray the hours according to Dominican custom and live life according to the Dominican rule and spirituality.
 
Geremia said:
Yes, of course. I ask because I have a friend whose father is a deacon, which has struck me as somewhat strange because I’ve thought it could result in a diminishing of “of their primary vocation” of marriage or the vocation to be a deacon. They seem divided. I guess I don’t understand why one can be married and become a deacon.
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I’ve heard this opinion stated many times here. You have to see and understand fully what marriage is and what happens in formation in order to see what affect the process has on a marriage.

If you believe that marriage is created by God, then how could a vocation formation to be a minister of God and His Church have anything but a positive affect on a union of man and woman?

My wife and I were close and in a solid relationship since we were both teenagers, I married my high school sweetheart. But we had no idea how special our relationship would become as a result of deepening our faith and our knowledge of our faith.

To put it simply, our marriage, “primary vocation”, would be more deminished had we not gone through the rigors of formation. As far as our children, they have been brought through a formation of young Catholics that many kids will never experience.

We have three teenage kids, 15 year old boy, 16 year old girl, and a 19 year old boy in college. They have thrived in the atmosphere that the diaconate has provided them. I thank God for leading me into this “secondary” vocation, because of my “primary” vocation.

PS. I don’t, neither do most deacons I would guess, look at either as a “primary or secondary” vocation. I am a husband and father who happens to be a deacon, quite simple.👍
 
Lapey said:
I’ve heard this opinion stated many times here. You have to see and understand fully what marriage is and what happens in formation in order to see what affect the process has on a marriage.

If you believe that marriage is created by God, then how could a vocation formation to be a minister of God and His Church have anything but a positive affect on a union of man and woman?

My wife and I were close and in a solid relationship since we were both teenagers, I married my high school sweetheart. But we had no idea how special our relationship would become as a result of deepening our faith and our knowledge of our faith.

To put it simply, our marriage, “primary vocation”, would be more deminished had we not gone through the rigors of formation. As far as our children, they have been brought through a formation of young Catholics that many kids will never experience.

We have three teenage kids, 15 year old boy, 16 year old girl, and a 19 year old boy in college. They have thrived in the atmosphere that the diaconate has provided them. I thank God for leading me into this “secondary” vocation, because of my “primary” vocation.

PS. I don’t, neither do most deacons I would guess, look at either as a “primary or secondary” vocation. I am a husband and father who happens to be a deacon, quite simple.👍
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Yes, that is good. Thanks for the insight. I guess I just worry about the possibility that the Church would have married priests, but I don’t think She’ll change her teaching on that. As both Pope John Paul II and our current Pope say, that is not up for discussion; it’ll never change. Protestant ministers seem to have a very divided life between their families and pastoral duties, and that seems partially responsible for the thousands of Protestant denominations’ lack of unity.
 
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