Retrouvaille

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Jonah

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My spouse and I will be heading to Retrouvaille this weekend.

Any testimonies here?

I’m a bit :confused: about the whole weekend…

I hope that God will touch my heart.
'm going with an open heart and an open
mind. This is our last resort…

pray for us…
 
saved my marriage plain and simple. Its unbelievably powerful. Its a lot of work and very intimidating at first but the out come is just WOW! PM me if you want more specific details.
 
My wife and I are also attending this weekend.

Tomorrow morning I am visiting the Carmelite convent. I will attend Mass and then talk to the doorkeeper Sister and ask for prayers of healing for the couples at Retrouvaille. Only God’s Grace can heal and prayer is necessary.

What a wonderful experience it is to be at the Carmelite Mass and hear the Sisters sing. Since they are cloistered, there is no direct contact but the chants are heavenly and their prayers are powerful.
 
We attended Retrouvaille in 1998. Our marriage was hanging on by thread. I can’t recommend Retrouvaille enough! We are very happily married today.
 
The judge in my divorce case has required that me and the soon to be Ex have to do some type of marriage counseling/encounter before he will sign the Dissolution papers.

Can one do the Retrouvaille thing, even with the intent just to use it to satisfy some overly zealous judge? Ive read that it is mostly seminars followed by alone time to discuss and talk with each other, and also alone time with yourself? correct?

We basically hate each other, and she also has a new boyfriend, so sharing a room is completely out. A weekend thing would work much better because we both can get off work much easier.

Whats to prevent going to the seminars, and then hanging out in your room surfing the internet on your new Verizon go-anywhere internet card? or playing FarCry?
 
Retrouvaille saved our family, plain and simple. My husband and I were divorced, but he kept bugging me to go to this thing. I figured what the heck, maybe we won’t fight so much in front of the kid. Little did I know that God would use this program to open my heart to a reconciliation (that I had never planned on), and we would eventually get remarried, this time in the Church! We have volunteered with Retrouvaille for the last several years as well as still attending follow-up meetings.
It really can make that much of a difference if you both go into it with an open mind and just do what they tell you–don’t fight the program. It simply teaches new techniques of communication, and gives you a chance to get to know each other in ways you probably never have before. It really was a life-changing event for us. I know that if we wouldn’t have gone, we would still be divorced.
We will be praying for you and all couples attending this weekend.
 
BioCatholic said:
The judge in my divorce case has required that me and the soon to be Ex have to do some type of marriage counseling/encounter before he will sign the Dissolution papers.

Can one do the Retrouvaille thing, even with the intent just to use it to satisfy some overly zealous judge? Ive read that it is mostly seminars followed by alone time to discuss and talk with each other, and also alone time with yourself? correct?

We basically hate each other, and she also has a new boyfriend, so sharing a room is completely out. A weekend thing would work much better because we both can get off work much easier.

Whats to prevent going to the seminars, and then hanging out in your room surfing the internet on your new Verizon go-anywhere internet card? or playing FarCry?
Click to expand...
I am not familiar with Retrouvaille very much, but I would suggest that if your intent in this program is to just “use” it to satisfy some requirement and you don’t even want to do it in the first place, to not waste the time of the very well intentioned coordinators and volunteers for this program. It seems that this program has changed the lives of many, and if you intend to do this program for the hope that God will save your marriage, I would say go for it, but it sounds like you just need someone to “sign off” on some sort of document, which seems like a waste of very blessed and talented people’s time. Sorry to be blunt, no offense intended at all. Just a suggestion.
 
thanks for the replies… I will be heading out to the one in San Antonio, TX…

My marriage is amicable, but infidelity has really put distance between me and spouse. Though spouse wants to work on the
marriage I have doubts the enthusiasm will last.

We’ve been through marriage encounter and Encore, the crusillo movement… so this is it…
 
I’ve posted here a few times, and always heartened when I see first, that there are people willing to try Retrouvaille, and second, that so many people are so positive on what it has done for them, particularly in a last ditch attempt to save their marriage. I’m saddened because my wife is so dead set against trying anything to save our 27 year marriage, and to save our family. Yes, I am the person that has screwed up, but I’m willing to move heaven and earth to save us. I dearly love my wife, and very much want to atone for what I’ve done to hurt her. Unless her heart is unhardened, and clearly I can’t do it, our marriage is doomed. Our current status is that we are physically separated, and have been for nearly 2 years, and for that same period of time she has been pursuing the legal separation aspects but amazingly after 2 years that has not been accomplished. I feel like my only hope is through prayer to hope that will soften her to consider trying Retrouvaille.
 
Our Retrouvaille experience was not the miracle I hoped for. They do stress that any infidelity must end before attending the weekend. I knew at the time that my husband was still receiving questionable e-mails from a young girl at work, and l was afraid to demand that he stop, as per the program’s requirement, because I was afraid we’d never go, if I held out for that. I later found out he was also continuing to have contact with another, very long term secret friend till about 15 months after Retrouvaille. So, we did not ‘follow the rules,’ so I can’t blame the program itself.

It’s also about listening to each other’s feelings. I found out that expressing the ‘wrong’ feelings (feeling hopeless because he was STILL e-mailing her) led to my husband storming out of a post session in anger. He has never made any attempt to continue the dialogues at home, so, naturally, it has not had much affect.

So… I guess what I’m saying is, I think the program is great and has obviously worked miracles for many people, but you do both have to go with a willingness to do the hard work and follow their rules and method, or it isn’t going to do anything for you.
 
I just need someone to sign a piece of paper to satisfy a family court judge that is way too concerned with what happens in people’s personal lives.

If he were a good strict constructionist judge, this would not be an issue. He would sign the Dissolution like the Law says we can obtain. No fault divorce is written into the law for a reason.

My Ex simply will not pay for any counseling. Her boyfreind will not let her share a room with me at an encounter. If we go to Retrovaille and I have to sleep in my car because they wont give us separate rooms, I will. I will pay for it all too.

And at the end Id walk up to somone and say “Oh that was so wonderful, I think it will help us so much. Can you sign this paper for my Judge?”

Who do you contact specifically to sign up? The national phone # all I ever get is an answering machine.
 
I’m back!

I have heard that it is not unusual for a judge or an attorney to request that the couple go to retrouvaille.

It is not a miracle cure, but once dialogue can happen a lot can be discovered. I do believe that every marriage should be given a second chance, third…

My spouse is excited about the dialogue and I am iffy… Then again I have never seen him excited about working on the marriage. I was done with it… I was ready to walk out… now I’m more like… fine lets work on this thing called marriage.

I feel that if my spouse loses interest in our marriage I will walk out… I will not live a miserable life forever… I won’t…

God Help Us ALL
 
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