Maybe your 11 year old daughter’s best friend comes from a very liberal home, and there is some big abortion news article in the paper, next time she’s over, ask her how she feels about it… Tell her how horrible it is that women kill their children, harm their bodies, and go through such mental anguish because they are scared or don’t know what else to do.
Oh yeah, that would go over just great. Do you happen to be the mom of an 11 year old? Or even know one?
I happen to have a 14 year old daughter, I’ve been a scout leader since the girls were in kindergarten, I’m very Pro-Life, my daughter is very Pro-Life and yet most of her friends (and their mothers) are very Pro-choice. (I used to be pro-choice before I returned to the Church and prayed enough for the grace to understand the Church’s position, OK, my prayers have been answered).
If I were to have such a conversation with the daughters of these women, telling them my world view on abortion, I would be inciting a riot. These women are very possessive with their daughter’s view of the world and would NOT take kindly to my opposing their position with their girls directly, especially outside of their presence.
It would lead to social suicide for both my daughter and myself. And, it would do absolutely nothing to advance the cause of life among the girls. They would rather be told how horrific these religious zealots can be and how … (blah, blah, blah). It would not lead to anything good.
Better yet, get your kids into activism, if they see the joy and love of foster families, adoptive parents, parents of special needs babies, etc. they will be likely to value family and their friends will hear them talk about these “everyday miracles”
Yes, this is the Better yet scenario, truly! I realized when my daughter was in the third grade and had a conversation explaining Mary, Mother of God to a friend from a fundamentalist family, that she could evangelize among her friends in a way that I absolutely could not. She did this at school when if I’d used the same words with the same child, I would have been shown to the door of the school and asked not to return.
I have since realized that as her mother, it is my responsibility to teach her everything possible so that she is prepared to educate her friends and possibly even save some lives. In the meantime, I hope to have her friends join us at things like the Walk for Life West Coast, where the mother’s know in advance what the agenda is and they can decide if they’re willing to allow their daughters to participate (or possibly even join themselves to see what it’s really like to see the Pro-lifer’s in action - a real awakening, to be certain, not what the media would suggest it’s like). In addition to taking her to last year’s Walk for Life, we’ve gone to hear Gianna Jessa, an abortion survivor, speak and I’ve taught her about embryonic stem cell research (as opposed to the more viable adult stem cell research - my degree is in BioChem, with research in genetic engineering).
I’ve also done as much as I know how to, to teach her the Church’s moral teachings. Christopher West has a new “Theology of the Body for Teens” coming out the middle of next month and I may be presenting it to local teens through our Parish (Father and I will be reviewing it when it’s released).
But, for me to shanghai kids without their mothers awareness and push my ideas on them would be seen as an abuse of their trust of me as an adult in their girls lives.
It is the parents responsibility to be the primary teacher of a child. This doesn’t mean that only Catholics have this right and responsibility. It doesn’t mean that if I disagree with what other parents are teaching that I have a right to shove my “Truth” down the throats of other parent’s kids behind their parents backs. If they did this to me, I’d be none too happy. Mind you, I’d have truth on my side, so I don’t think they’d get very far, but I still wouldn’t appreciate it. Why would I expect them to feel differently?
It’s my responsibility to find common ground with these women, the other mom’s, and see if I can find ways to open them up to the truth, one small step at a time. On helping them, I can help their daughters. In the meantime, my daughter can help their daughters, as it’s fair for her to do so.
CARose