For self-respect, consider your standards for judging.
Is it that you are not succeeding at something meaningful to you – in general or in particular, for example? Is it that you do not meet a standard you “are supposed to” or “are trying to” that may be your own, or that of some other person(s) or organization(s) like the church’s? A parent’s vision?
Recognize what your strengths are. What are you good at? What can you work on to develop to improve something about yourself that’s important to you. Are you on a plan to do what you think is right with your time in the world?
For self-love, consider when you extend a loving touch to others, and all you want is for them to receive it. Like if you give a dog a bone the fact it receives it, is all you need – it doesn’t have to say “thank you” but your seeing it enjoy the bone is your thanks.
Think about doing something for yourself. Whether it is meeting a particular goal on something important to you, or something entirely “selfish” like taking a much-needed rest that if it improves your day also improves the day of those you touch. Receive it fully if it’s edifying, and allow yourself to ponder the benefit and what it may mean to your life. Allow yourself to enjoy those honest traits and actions and experiences you have that are heartwarming, and notice the little things. Like if you spend a few extra seconds to “stop and smell the roses.” Know that your experience of beauty and love in the world is not independent of your own beauty and love but mirrors it even as you learn to notice and enjoy it more.
