Sex and marriage question

[Bailey2]

So what would happen if one party was sterilized for reasons that were NOT medical (i.e. they had it done during a previous marriage). What would be the options for such a couple who wish to marry in the Catholic church?

Gee, no one answered you and I was joking above. But I guess after the long temper tantrum…:banghead:
I think in order to marry in the Church post vas done for reasons other than medical (or for medical reasons if I understand Catholic teaching correctly now), is the acknowledgment of understanding that this act was selfish (sinful) and there is now true repentance for that act and an acceptance of Church teaching on the subject. But, I am not an authority obviously, as seen above, so I’d say that person should make an appt with a priest to find out what they need to do, if they are serious about it. And incidentally, a friend of mine’s husband had his reversed after repentance and they now have a third child. Blessings.

 

[1ke]

So what would happen if one party was sterilized for reasons that were NOT medical (i.e. they had it done during a previous marriage). What would be the options for such a couple who wish to marry in the Catholic church?

Sterility is not an impediment to marriage in the Catholic Church.

 

[1ke]

Bailey,

The Church does not teach that a non-contracepting spouse has culpability/sin when their spouse contracepts.

Also, the Church doesn’t teach contraception is wrong because it’s technology based or *because *it is not “natural.” NFP isn’t moral *because *it’s “natural.” Therefore your analogy of pacemakers and technology and natural death are misplaced.

 

[Bailey2]

1ke, for the life of me, I think I will never understand all this stuff. Best I just leave it alone, keep my opinions to myself, and continue to simply work with the poor.
blessings

 

[ac_claire]

I agree with you. I am glad you are doing what you are doing and I wish all Catholics could do it

But I have seen women for whom couldn’t use NFP even with all the latest techniques. I have seen women whose children have been harmed and taken from them for not using a more permanent means of birth control because it was against their religion (not necessarily Catholic). I have seen women not practice NFP because their husbands won’t and then they feel badly because of the absolute nature of how it is presented by those who can practice it and have supportive husbands. I think that when one takes such a hard and cold stance, the end result is judgment for the women of whom I speak, even those who are “forgiven” because they married “sinful” men. How can one be in union with such a husband when in the back of their minds, they think he is “sinful” on such an intimate level. The black and white nature of the discussions here leave the silent ones here and the ones who don’t sign up likely to think that they are judged weaker in faith or have no faith at all because God would have found a way… they apparently weren’t listening right or trusting enough.

Or they get angry over the same. I think that is indirect judgment by those who can practice NFP, even sometimes thinking they are better because of it (not you personally mind you). I think that is one reason why people leave our church. I get the feeling sometimes that this is what many want on this forum… and I think that is wrong. To take such an absolute stance and assume if it is not adhered to, one is not up there faithful with the minority rest.
I am old. But according to many of you, I am the problem. Ignorant Vatican II liberals. Perhaps we older people, who of course know nothing of real Catholicism, have seen much suffering. And feel that mercy and not the letter of the law is the way to go. Granted, blatant rejection of NFP, which actually is only a means to space children not choose not to have them-- for selfish reasons is wrong. But I have seen more exceptions than people like you who can do this. My profession (social worker) probably. Anyway, I don’t know what to say… I can’t change what you guys think. I won’t change how I think for the sake of the Catholics who are not welcome really… because they can’t live up to the expectations of the holy few.
Pray for them but more, live that prayer and try to understand with an open heart instead of clinging to the rules as a means to heaven. That’s how I feel and I make no judgment of the rest… but I do cry over it sometimes.

But the issue has nothing to do with people being sad over feeling that they’re being “judged”. The issue is what the Church teaches; we can trust God and accept what the Church teaches or not. Saying that “mercy and not the letter of the law is the way to go” is setting up a false conflict.

 

[Bailey2]

But the issue has nothing to do with people being sad over feeling that they’re being “judged”. The issue is what the Church teaches; we can trust God and accept what the Church teaches or not. Saying that “mercy and not the letter of the law is the way to go” is setting up a false conflict.

Got it. Thank you. Peace.

 

[joandarc2008]

As far as one who is sterilized regardless of intent - they need to confess with a clear heart of repentence and all will be forgiven. That is the forgiving nature of the Lord our Father and unfortunately something we fail sometimes to show each other.