Sexual relations and sick husband

[lwest]

… but I am sure he won’t get mad.

Check your Cathechism…“self service” is a sin. Granted, there could be mitigating circumstances but if those 3 conditions of mortal sin exist, the original poster would be risking her soul. The “God will understand” b.s. has gotten a lot of people in spiritual trouble and it contadicts Catholic teaching. There’s a natural level and a supernatural level. People haven’t become saints because they sat there worrying about their physical ‘needs’. And sex isn’t necessarily a physical ‘need’…if that were true, it would be cruel and inhumane to expect priests to remain celibate.

 

[TLM08]

They’re both grave matter, both very likely to be mortally sinful, both against the natural law.

The idea that masturbation is “no big deal” is a thoroughly modern, and secular one. Check out St. Thomas Aquinas on the species of lust.

I would venture to say that masturbation probably causes more spiritual and psychological harm than simple fornication, and is right up there with adultery in the damage it does to relationships.

Don’t you see the innumerable people that come to this forum saying they are addicted to masturbation and pornography, and the wives and girlfriends saying it is destroying their relationships? These are way more common that the stories of adultery. Most men seem to find it fairly easy to give up chasing women when they marry, but many find it really hard to give up masturbation.

God Bless

If we do not accept the reality of our sexuality, that side of us splits off and grows like a hungry wild dog in the basement. Often it is people who are the most harsh, judgemental and outspoken are hiding an incredible cast of demons in their own closet. I should know because this was how I acted for a long time.

A lot of what you say is true, but we really need to deal with reality. This sex stuff is powerful and everybody’s situation is different. We need to do the best we can and pray for one another.

 

[ClementRome]

I am 56 years old and my husband is 70. He has been ill for several years and can no longer participate in sexual relations. It has now been over three years since we slept in the same room and five years since our last sexual encounter. I know that this may sound selfish of me, but what can I do? I would never think of going outside of our marriage for relief and it is something that I cannot speak with him about because it would cause him undue distress. Any ideas?

I wouldn’t put any undue stress on him, since he is 70. Any physical exertion could cause a heart attack at that age. Sex isn’t everything.

 

[AdriannaJean]

The resurrection hasn’t happened yet and there will be resurrected bodies at that time. Right now, only souls are in Heaven.

And does your Catholic theologan know better than the Son of God. I was quoting Him directly. He is the authority. And if your Catholic theologan is contradicting Church teaching, you shouldn’t be listening to him. I’m not trying to be patronizing. I’m just reminding you of Church teaching. Check your Catechism.

Again, once you have read the article, which does address the fact that we have no spouses in Heaven, I would be happy to discuss this with you. Peter Kreeft is not contradicting Church teaching and if you read the article, you would see that for yourself.