Should Catholics Be Friends With Bad Company?

[Tom_Baum]

I know some Catholics who have lots of friends, many of which IMO are questionable. Am I wrong or is there something questionable when Catholics/Christians keep company with athiests, wiccans/pagans, pro-choicers, gays/lesbians, or anyone else that could influence them?

You might have a point there, since Jesus, Himself, was called down for the company He kept.

Page one, “Let Us make man (humanity) in Our Image…”, it doesn’t say, ‘let Us make some in Our Image’, does it?

All people are our brothers and sisters, like it or not.

One way to look at it is that Jesus is our Liaison with Dad and we are also called to be liaisons.

 

[Tom_Baum]

The question is: Should Catholics Be Friends With Bad Company?

Maybe it should be rephrased to be: Should Catholics be catholic?

 

[SuperLuigi]

I understand your point, but I think we have all been phrasing (or previously phrased and maybe not-so-clearly-implied-in-follow-up-posts) that this was only acceptable so long as it was not a threat to one’s own faith. Therefore, if it were not a sex addict but a nun very secure in her chastity, I think spending a lot of time with a prostitute to spread the Gospel would be an excellent example of Christian love and charity.

That’s a great response.

 

[PolarGuy]

The question falsely assumes that the Catholics are the good company. Some of the worst company I’ve ever kept are people who claim to be faithful Catholics.

I too find the post a tad judgmental. To the extent the question is legitimate, yes, we should be friends with all people.

 

[EasterJoy]

Exactly! Also, doesn’t God instruct us to love everyone? We don’t have to like them, but we must love them for they are children of God even if they do not follow His ways.

Also, following the post before this one with just because someone is Catholic doesn’t mean they act like one. I was stuck in traffic behind someone who had a bumper sticker that said “If you love Jesus, Honk your horn”. So I did… in fact, I kept honking it. Meanwhile, the guy who was driving his car gave me the finger. I guess he forgot he had that bumper sticker on his car.

God bless,

John

It is legitimate to shun someone because he or she poses a grave temptation. For instance, one alcoholic might keep away from another because both will have more trouble staying sober if they’re together. That’s not judgemental, obviously, since the trouble is that both are prone to abuse alcohol. It doesn’t mean they do not care about each other.

It is also legitimate to shun someone who has made it his or her business to talk you out of following a code of morals that you’ve chosen. To taunt someone as “thinking they’re too good for us” when all you’ve ever done is to tempt them away from innocence is a bit rich! No one should let that charge get under their skin. That doesn’t mean some Christian willing to socialize with those who have rejected a Christian moral code ought to be criticized for it. If near occasions of sin are avoided and dangerous situations are avoided–it is not prudent to hang around with people whose associations make them liable to be shot at, for instance–there are no people we have to avoid because they are sinners.

 

[PaulGH]

I don’t know about being friends with Bad Company, but there’s certainly nothing wrong with enjoying songs like Shooting Star or Rock n’ Roll Fantasy.

(You can click here if you have no idea what I’m talking about.)

 

[DarkLight]

It is legitimate to shun someone because he or she poses a grave temptation. For instance, one alcoholic might keep away from another because both will have more trouble staying sober if they’re together. That’s not judgemental, obviously, since the trouble is that both are prone to abuse alcohol. It doesn’t mean they do not care about each other.

It is also legitimate to shun someone who has made it his or her business to talk you out of following a code of morals that you’ve chosen. To taunt someone as “thinking they’re too good for us” when all you’ve ever done is to tempt them away from innocence is a bit rich! No one should let that charge get under their skin. That doesn’t mean some Christian willing to socialize with those who have rejected a Christian moral code ought to be criticized for it. If near occasions of sin are avoided and dangerous situations are avoided–it is not prudent to hang around with people whose associations make them liable to be shot at, for instance–there are no people we have to avoid because they are sinners.

This is good. And I think it has to be done on a case-by-case basis - and not all the cases will be the obvious sins. For me the hardest part is gossips and pride. I have to stay away from those who tend to encourage looking down on others, which is a real danger within higher education especially. But I’m pretty ok with people who want to argue about stuff, long as they’re polite about it.

 

[Contra_Mundum_1]

I have many people in my life that are spiritually and morally a mess. Eventually, most* not all*, will distance themselves from you- not the other way around.

This has been my experience as well. Back in the day when I was younger and more willing to put up with things, I was friends with all sorts of people. I didn’t mind. But it turned out many of them did when they found out I was a Catholic serious about their faith.

These days I find that I can be friendly with people who are completely different from me, but not necessarily be real friends. There is a difference. I simply prefer the company of those who share my faith. I find them more interesting and their company is edifying.

 

[CradleJourney]

You’ve got a valid point. I don’t consider myself judgemental and I’m am a sinner just like everyone else. BUT what would a Catholic/Christian have in a common with someone who doesn’t have the same core beliefs? I always thought friendships were based on things you have in common. I guess it is possible to be friends with someone who has very different beliefs than you but wouldn’t it be condoning things against your faith? Would it be possible good friends with a woman who was pro-choice, and had mulitple abortions? Would it be possible to be friends with an athiest who mocked your beliefs? Would it be possible to be friends with a gay man who wanted you to attend his “wedding”?

Please enlighten me so I can understand your POV.

I have many, many things in common with friends who don’t share my faith. Such as parenting, quilting, reading, chess, various sports, and the list goes on.

Respect for each others beliefs outside of the areas of common is a given, or else there can be no friendship (imho). Thus while I could be friends with a woman who had an abortion (and in all likelyhood already am, I just don’t know it), I probably could not remain friends if she was actively promoting pro-choice views. Ditto for the atheist scenario - if they were mocking my beliefs then they wouldn’t be my friend - because that’s not what friends do.

On the other hand, I have no problem offering support and healing “wishes” (she knows I pray) to an atheist friend recovering from an illness - and she’d be one of the first in line hoping for and supporting my recovery if I was ill. Haven’t been invited to a gay wedding - but then, since they know I’m catholic, they’d probably just skip inviting me.

 

[AnotherIrishOne]

I don’t know about being friends with Bad Company, but there’s certainly nothing wrong with enjoying songs like Shooting Star or Rock n’ Roll Fantasy.

(You can click here if you have no idea what I’m talking about.)

ahahahahahaaaaa!!!

 

[Mumbles140]

But, did the Lord Jesus abandon Peter after He said “Get behind Me, Satan!”? Can we not become a stumbling block by ignoring others (if not to them, then to our selves)?

Because Peter repented. Had Peter been a continual temptation to abandon His mission, and if Christ truly were drawn towards listening to Peter, I imagine Christ would have separated Himself from Peter.

So man leave in his wandering eye solely so he has the possibility of correcting it? How does one weight their own salvation against the salvation of others? I imagine that, if truly necessary, God would want us to obtain our salvation first, as we could never truly know the fate of another anyways.

 

[Mumbles140]

The question falsely assumes that the Catholics are the good company. Some of the worst company I’ve ever kept are people who claim to be faithful Catholics.

I too find the post a tad judgmental. To the extent the question is legitimate, yes, we should be friends with all people.

Sorry for taking your post as the hyperbole, but I think this line of thinking can be dangerous when it beings to threaten one’s own faith. Should I be friends with ISIS? An abortionist? A car thief? A lawyer (just kidding!)?

A prudent Catholic must weigh the value of the friendship against any moral distress, scandal, or other threat to personal (or other people’s) faith. That isn’t to say we should ignore these people - quite the opposite, actually, as we should try to instruct them and correct their ways. It is one thing for me to engage in dialogue with an abortionist, but quite another to go on a week vacation with one…