Should I be a silent objector to weddings?

[runonwi]

I don’t attend the weddings of friends who co-habitate or who I know are having pre-marital sex, regardless of whether it’s a religious or civil ceremony.

• Am I being overly sensitive to this? Should I be attending to show my support that they’re finally getting married?
• When I don’t attend, I never tell the couple my reasons for not doing so. Sometimes I wonder if I’m chickening out by not calling out the sin. That even though I’m not attending the ceremony, my silence is still condoning their situation.

Is it a scandal to witness these unions? Do I have a moral obligation to share why I think their living situations are wrong? Any recommended wording in doing so?

 

[Michelle_Arnold]

I don’t attend the weddings of friends who co-habitate or who I know are having pre-marital sex, regardless of whether it’s a religious or civil ceremony.

That’s a valid option. For more information, see the Q&A linked below:

Recommended reading:

What are the rules for attending weddings?

runonwi:

Am I being overly sensitive to this? Should I be attending to show my support that they’re finally getting married?

That is also a valid option. Again, see the link above for more details.

runonwi:

When I don’t attend, I never tell the couple my reasons for not doing so. Sometimes I wonder if I’m chickening out by not calling out the sin. That even though I’m not attending the ceremony, my silence is still condoning their situation. Is it a scandal to witness these unions? Do I have a moral obligation to share why I think their living situations are wrong? Any recommended wording in doing so?

A helpful rule of thumb might be that the closer the relationship, the more obligation you have to explain your reasons for declining. So, for example, you owe your sister a gentle explanation about why you won’t be attending her wedding; a casual friend, colleague, or acquaintance, you owe merely a polite formal expression of your regrets that you can’t attend.

Recommended reading:

How do I decline a wedding invitation?