Should I get a divorce/annulment?

[joes12345]

Oh my friend, I feel for you so much for going through this. I was in a similar situation long ago. My prayers are with you.

Don’t listen to me beacause I freely admit the older I get the more I realize how little I know. but…

Doesn’t one of the gospels say no divorce exept for marital unfaithfulness? It sounds to me you’ve been as faithful as a man can be. And she isn’t faithful at all.

I’m not advising you to get divorced but we know that with repentance God forgives those who have committed all kinds of serious sins. Would he not forgive those of us who have always been devoted to him and kept his word but at one time made a bad mistake as far as a spouse goes? I’m asking here.

When I got divorced years ago I prayed so hard for understanding. I believe I’ve been forgiven and I am remarried again - (annulment was granted). Unfortunately that’s not going so well now either but that’s another thread.

You’ll know what to do when you and JC are honestly at peace with your thoughts.

Some major prayers are going out for you from me and the crew here. I know they’ll be answered in one way or another.

 

[wcknight]

It sounds like you are a bit wishy washy about your whole relationship. So you are sending mixed signals. Tell your wife you are willing to make things work IF she is willing to never see her boyfriend again AND is willing to forego any new romantic relationship with any other guy.

IF you can move to a different city or elsewhere, do so and start over

Marriage is a full time 100% commitment from one person to another forever. Neither one of you can have one foot half out the door and the other in. She can not have a friend of the opposite sex especially one in which she has had a romantic interest. They should never have been alone together. They should have ceased seeing each other totally, once she promised to give him up.

It is great to be forgiving but by being so lenient on their still meeting, you have in effect become an enabler to her weaknesses. She is still almost entirely at fault but you did not help by allowing her access to him.

The problem is SHE is the one who needs to be seeing a priest and going to confession, she should be the one praying and asking for forgiveness. It is great that you are as well, but the need is far greater for her to repent than for you to.

I hope things work out for you, and I pray your wife finds her way before it is too late. Unless she becomes as committed to your marriage as you are, I think, it would be very difficult for things to last.