Should I get Confirmed if I have a sin I don't yet feel repentance for?

[rrj75]

This is a really tough question to ask, because I feel so guilty for not being repentant. Ironically, I think I feel more guilt for not being repentant of the sin, than I feel for the sin itself. I would first of all ask all of you to please pray for me because I know I am caught up in a bad place right now.

Basically, I have been wanting to become Catholic for over a year. I really do think that now that my Confirmation date is less than a week away that I’m facing these temptations for a reason, like the devil is trying to prevent or delay my conversion at the last minute.
There is a situation that popped up into my life out of nowhere that is tempting me to commit a mortal sin, that I had given up after turning to Catholicism but it was my greatest vice before I did. I’ve committed this sin twice since my last confession and not only was I glad I did it afterward, but I actually felt myself looking forward to the next time I would commit that sin.

I know that’s horrible. I had a genuine confession for this sin before, too. I don’t know what’s happening to me, but I totally backslide out of nowhere.
So first off, I want to know if anyone else has ever felt this way, and how they have dealt with not being able to go to confession. I know it is a sin, so I feel remorse in a distant, vague way, but i feel like I know deep down inside I am really likely to commit this sin again. I feel like I should not go to confession unless I know I will make a reasonable effort not to. But, does that mean i shouldn’t get confirmed? I know I can’t get Confirmed without going to confession. But I want to get Confirmed, and I was truly prepared in my heart, until this major setback.

And I know this is trivial compared to the graver matter, but I do have a sister that bought plane tickets to come see my Confirmation. I feel like I’m going to be tempted to use the pressure from that to get Confirmed when I know I’m not right with God, if I can’t figure out a way to start feeling guilty for this sin before next Sunday.

Any help would be appreciated.

 

[Neithan]

This is definitely a question for a priest. @edward_george1 sometimes offers his advice here. God bless you and I’ll pray for you. This should be a joyful time for you and no doubt the Enemy is working hard to interfere.

In case you don’t get a reply here can you talk to your Pastor?

 

[rrj75]

I was thinking about just going to confession and being honest with the priest about how I felt about the sin, but I didn’t know if it that was the time or place to go into all the extra details. Hopefully if I don’t get an answer on here I can email him and try to set up an appointment. Thank you for your prayers!

 

[kapp19]

I was thinking about just going to confession and being honest with the priest about how I felt about the sin, but I didn’t know if it that was the time or place to go into all the extra details. Hopefully if I don’t get an answer on here I can email him and try to set up an appointment. Thank you for your prayers!

This is what you should do.

And consider how hurt the Lord is that you would choose something other than His friendship - despite the gifts He wants to give you.

I will pray for you.

-K

 

[rrj75]

Thank you for your words to think about & your prayers

 

[Vico]

…

Actual sin is voluntary. Also attachment to sin occurs from it, and even occur when an act or omission is only materially sinful and not an actual sin. The minimum necessary for valid confession of a mortal sin is imperfect contrition as described in the Catechism

1453 The contrition called “imperfect” (or “attrition”) is also a gift of God, a prompting of the Holy Spirit. It is born of the consideration of sin’s ugliness or the fear of eternal damnation and the other penalties threatening the sinner (contrition of fear). Such a stirring of conscience can initiate an interior process which, under the prompting of grace, will be brought to completion by sacramental absolution. By itself however, imperfect contrition cannot obtain the forgiveness of grave sins, but it disposes one to obtain forgiveness in the sacrament of Penance.

In an act of contrition, such as below, the dread of hell is the attrition, and the proper disposition is also to avoid it next time, even though attachments remain:

O my God, I am heartily sorry for having offended Thee, and I detest all my sins,
because of Thy just punishments;

However, with the right intention of regret and avoidance in the future, some simply use this prayer:

Lord Jesus, Son of God, have mercy on me, a sinner.

And an ending is:

I firmly resolve, with the help of Thy grace, to sin no more and to avoid the near occasions of sin.

 

[Ignatius]

Repentance is not a feeling. The word in the original Greek is Metanoia and and it means to turn around or go the other direction. It is an action and a decision.
Decide that you want to stop doing what offends God and do instead what pleases Him. Ask Him for the Grace to do it. That is repentance.

 

[TheLittleLady]

Repentance is not a feeling, it is an action.

If you repent because you are afraid of going to hell, that is what we call “imperfect contrition” and the priest can give you absolution.

Go to confession, stop sinning.

 

[rrj75]

Thank you for your advice. One question: is having an imperfect contrition something you have to specify to the priest? i’m thinking so but just want to make sure because I’ve never heard that phrase before

 

[TheLittleLady]

You can mention it, or it will be evident by how you answer the priest’s questions.

Perfect Contrition is very difficult for us to achieve, it means we repent because of the sin itself that is against the love of God and we have no attachment to that sin.

Imperfect Contrition, you are repenting because you are afraid to go to hell, you do want to amend your life and you do not want to sin anymore.