Should I offer a full tithe or send money to my elderly father?

[robdaddyf]

It is my desire to give to the Church at least 10% of what I earn and I have been working toward this mark for some time now. However, I have an elderly father who I believe I must also help to support financially. Would it be right to give up to half of the money I would otherwise give to the Church to my father to help with his basic necessities? An aspect of this question that I should point out is that we have practically no money left over for ourselves after we give to the Church at this point because my current employment, though reasonable, does not leave our family a great deal of “extra.”

Can you help?

 

[Fr.Eric_Filmer]

In terms of tithing to the Church, it is part of the Precepts of the Church and the Catechism describes such tithing in the following manner:

2043: The fifth precept (“You shall help to provide for the needs of the Church”) means that the faithful are obliged to assist with the material needs of the Church, each according to his own ability.

Note that the Catholic Church does not set a specific percentage of one’s income to tithe (either to one’s parish or to other endeavors). It is also worth noting that there are a variety of non-monetary ways to support one’s parish which would also be in keeping with the 5th Precept (such as with volunteer services, sharing one’s talents, etc.).

In terms of the obligations grown children have to their parents, the catechism teaches us:

2218: The fourth commandment reminds grown children of their responsibilities toward their parents. As much as they can, they must give them material and moral support in old age and in times of illness, loneliness, or distress. Jesus recalls this duty of gratitude.

For the Lord honored the father above the children, and he confirmed the right of the mother over her sons. Whoever honors his father atones for sins, and whoever glorifies his mother is like one who lays up treasure. Whoever honors his father will be gladdened by his own children, and when he prays he will be heard. Whoever glorifies his father will have long life, and whoever obeys the Lord will refresh his mother.

“O son, help your father in his old age, and do not grieve him as long as he lives; even if he is lacking in understanding, show forbearance; in all your strength do not despise him. . . . Whoever forsakes his father is like a blasphemer, and whoever angers his mother is cursed by the Lord” (Sirach 3:2-6).

In light of all this, it is commendable that you desire to support both your parish and your father. In terms of assistance from your income, the exact amount that you ascribe to each is up to the discretion of you and your family.