Should I, or should i not reach out to a no-contact "friend"?

[Basil]

Hello everyone, happy Easter.
So… to start the story, two years ago I fall into an intimate immortal relationship with someone, to name as M here. Blessed be to the Lord after a period of intense contrition with helps of a priest, I was liberated from that sin. We have no direct contacts since then. Yet, shamefully to say, while knowing M’s Gnostic heterodox tendency and so-called “Catholic socialist” involvements (not labeling, that’s how they address themselves), I was the sponsor for M’s confirmation. So spiritually I’m obliged to pray for M’s soul constantly. Recently because of the spreading of coronavirus in Europe, I was helping send out basic protective means to various religious communities including France where M lives. And I just felt an eager to send M some stuff as while. Though it is quite possible M may not in urgent need of them (M’s father is the director of a hospital back in M’s native country ). I confess I do still bare some affections to M even now, but I could never approve or accept M’s many deeds and views. M is an intellectual and compassionate person, with a somehow profound sense on spiritual matters and prayers alike, this is the part I was attracted to in the first place. But to live as a pro-choicer, sexual liberation supporter, flag-waving feminist, riot-cheering socialist, soft-pornography promoter while attending Latin mass and receiving communions for its aesthetic satisfaction is just too much for my conscience to bare. For a time I was even contemplating we could go back to high Anglicans, where aesthetics, spiritual and intellectual needs are perfectly met while “all are welcome” (it didn’t work out since in general French mentality despises all things English, thank God for that).

I’m afraid this outreach maybe interrupted as a sign of reconciliation, which I have no intentions to do so before M unconditional accept all teachings from the Magisterium of the Church, and stop dooming own soul and others’ to ultra-destruction. Also I doubt the real motivation behind this seemingly good-intention maybe a covert trap coming from the enemy of soul, or simply from my human weakness…In this situation, should I or should I not reach out? What are your advices?
Thanks for reading, meanwhile please pray for me, and conversion of hearts…
AJPM <3+

*Sorry about my problematic English expressions…

 

[sudy]

My advice would be not to reach out. The reason you’re thinking about M is because you’re still somewhat tied to M emotionally. M does not need your help from a health perspective as her father is already able to assist her. Do yourself a favour and avoid opening old wounds.

 

[Tis_Bearself]

M was an occasion of sin for you and one for which you had a hard time breaking the habit.

Do not use this pandemic as an excuse to get back in contact with a person who’s an occasion of sin for you. As Sudy said, M is not in need of the stuff you’re sending out as her father can help her, and you’re just looking for a reason to re-connect with M because you’re not “over her”. Leave it alone. Do not contact her.

 

[Annie]

When you think of her, especially of contacting her in any way, pray for her instead. If you continue to think of her afterwards, then stop thinking of her by praying for others or for help for yourself.

This sort of thing often happens, by the way. When our lives are unsettled or we are unhappy, our minds often drift back to a time when things seemed better. It’s a good thing in that it reminds us that life can be different than it is now, but a bad thing when it tempts us to do the wrong thing.

 

[TK421]

It is preferable to form intimate relationships with people that share values with you.

Reaching out sounds nice in theory, but becoming “a friend” probably isn’t realistic.

 

[Basil]

Thank you very much for all your advice, thank you. I do greatly appreciate them. I will pray instead of reach out now. Many of you have observed it correctly, it maybe/is just an excuse to give into my weakness in an unsettled time…
Thank you all again, please remember me in your prayers. May God bless you all.
AJPM <3+

 

[Minks]

Please, please, please, MYOB! (Mind Your Own Business!) I’m not being nasty or snarky.

Let well enough alone. The past can’t stay in the past if you dig it up.

This woman attracted you intellectually and physically. Your conscience has told you that, regardless of any attractions, she’s against what you hold dear and know is pleasing to God. Your conscience has told you that she relishes subject matter and activities that are blatantly anti-Catholic and make you feel bad.

We all like to think that we can take that “bad” gal or guy and turn their lives around, because in some ways they’re sooooo likeable and lovable.

Even the nastiest people can sometimes be loving toward at least one other person. Most people would agree that Hitler was a monster, but Eva Braun found him loveable. He was still a horrid and wicked person, responsible for the torturing and sadistic murdering of tens of thousands of people.

Breathe a sigh of relief that she’s out of your life. There was a Country-Western song that sums it up. (Greyhound, in the US, is an interstate, coast-to-coast bus company.) “Thank God, and Greyhound, She’s Gone!”

Best wishes in finding someone who believes as you do, or, at least, doesn’t believe the opposite.