Should I send this conversion story to my ex-Catholic, now non-denominational Christian friend?

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This morning I read the following conversion story. envoymagazine.com/backissues/0.1/solved.htm

I found it really interesting because the author addresses all the usual misconceptions about the Catholic faith and lists major difficulties with the Protestant belief system.

I have a friend who was received in the Catholic Church when she was in high school but joined non-denominational community about 10 years ago when she was in her mid 20s. She was really intense about her conversion and new found love for Jesus so I never discussed the issue with her, knowing that she would not have listened.

I’ve read many conversion stories but this one really stood out for some reason and I immediately thought of her, and I’m wondering if that is a little nudge from the Holy Spirit to forward the story.
I’m hoping that a seed will be planted and that she will think about it all.

I’m not sure how to phrase my email. I basically want her to explain to me how her community deals with the difficulties encountered by the author when she was a Protestant. I’d like to stress John 6 among other things, as well as the fact that the sola scriptura principle simply doesn’t exist anywhere in the Bible. I’d like to ask how they interpret that the gates of hell shall not prevail over the church and that Christ will stay with it forever, and their belief that God abandoned the church after the Appstles died. There are several other issues I’d like to stress, like the once saved-always saved principle. I want to be careful about the tone so it doesn’t feel like an attack but at the same time I want to show her that I know about these problems and that I’d like to discuss them.

Any suggestions?

Thank you!
 
Non-denominationals have a (in my opinion silly) phobia of tradition. The more you try to proselytize your friend, the farther you’re going to drive that friend away.

Much as I have issues with the “non-denom” strand, I strongly encourage you to just be grateful that this friend hasn’t left Christianity entirely.

A while ago I met a guy who left Anglicanism for Seventh Day Adventism. SDA’s, in my opinion, hold some petty things as dogma and it can get (again, in my opinion) pretty ridiculous. I tried arguing with him about baptism as a sacrament, communion, freedom from Levitical law, and all that jazz, but he wouldn’t budge.

A few years later, he came to the conclusion all on his own that SDA’s are a little extreme. He’s much more moderate now.

The entire time, I was never worried about his faith in Jesus Christ our dead and risen savior, the only Son of God. And obviously, holy living wasn’t an issue, either. If that’s the case with your friend, please leave it alone. There’s no fanatic like a convert. Once the dust settles and your friend matures spiritually, you’ll be able to talk about other theological issues without doing more damage than good.
 
Go for it and send it to her!

I read the article you linked to and thought it was absolutely excellent. It mirrored, to a “T,” my own struggles with Evangelical Protestantism. If nothing else, it will give her something to think about, and the Holy Spirit can use that.

I would just send (or give) her the article without any other commentary for now. (Maybe even print it out for her.) Just ask her to read it and let you know what she thought of it. Then, later, if she’s open to it (and she might not be at this point) you can go into the other points, such as John 6 and sola scriptura, that you mentioned you wanted to share with her.

Just my two cents, coming from an Evangelical background.
 
Kristine L. Franklin author, speaker, co-host of EWTN’s “Household of Faith”. Rosalind Moss (now Sr. Rosalind Moss) was the other co-host.

The program reairs occassionly on EWTN.
 
I am a cradle catholic who left after high school because it seemed irrelevent who returned with wife and kids to fill a void in our lives who left looking for a community where people did not just go through the motions, who came back because of the liturgy, who left yet again but am once again contemplating return.

I always listened or read material given to me but it was always the prompting of the Holy Spirit in my soul that got me thinking about returning and that came from the prayer of others I am sure for if I was God I would have given up on me along time ago.

During my wanderings I never considered myself away from God for I was in a church worshipping every week but here lately I lost hope in most churches and I have been taking a long, hard look at myself and my beliefs. If your friend feels close to God then only God working internally will have an effect - so pray and speak if an opportunity arises.

If your friend knows that you love them, you can speak freely about religious differences. Some catholics on this website come off as superior as if they were anointed because of their own goodness (by the way some protestants do as well). Don’t come from the point of view that you are superior because you are catholic for that is a wall hard to tear down.

Your friend left for a reason, valid for them at the time, but one positive message of the once saved always saved doctrine is that Jesus is the basis of our hope and He will complete the good work He started in us according to scripture. If you challenge the reason they left you can put a wall as well. If the reason has no basis, God will reveal this, so pray they have understanding.

Pray. If you are prompted to do something by God you will know. Ask your priest but otherwise follow your prompting. If you think you must do something besides praying, but seem unsure, this usually comes from anxiety and scripture tells us to be anxious for nothing, just pray.

Praying with you for God’s will in your friends life, God Bless
 
Contra_Mundum said:
This morning I read the following conversion story. envoymagazine.com/backissues/0.1/solved.htm

I found it really interesting because the author addresses all the usual misconceptions about the Catholic faith and lists major difficulties with the Protestant belief system.

I have a friend who was received in the Catholic Church when she was in high school but joined non-denominational community about 10 years ago when she was in her mid 20s. She was really intense about her conversion and new found love for Jesus so I never discussed the issue with her, knowing that she would not have listened.

I’ve read many conversion stories but this one really stood out for some reason and I immediately thought of her, and I’m wondering if that is a little nudge from the Holy Spirit to forward the story.
I’m hoping that a seed will be planted and that she will think about it all.

I’m not sure how to phrase my email. I basically want her to explain to me how her community deals with the difficulties encountered by the author when she was a Protestant. I’d like to stress John 6 among other things, as well as the fact that the sola scriptura principle simply doesn’t exist anywhere in the Bible. I’d like to ask how they interpret that the gates of hell shall not prevail over the church and that Christ will stay with it forever, and their belief that God abandoned the church after the Appstles died. There are several other issues I’d like to stress, like the once saved-always saved principle. I want to be careful about the tone so it doesn’t feel like an attack but at the same time I want to show her that I know about these problems and that I’d like to discuss them.

Any suggestions?

Thank you!
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It’s a great article written from direct experience. Send it out and see where it flies. It certainly can’t hurt.
 
I briefly looked at the article and I think right now, it’s best to wait. Pray about it and ask God to open the doors to discuss it. If the doors open, you can briefly talk about the article. If she is curious, send it to her. If she doesn’t appear to be curious, leave it alone for now and save it in a word file with the link until the spirit opens the doors. Some good articles can disappear from the web and this one is worth while keeping. It could also alientate yourself from her so be careful.

Having spent a little less than a decade inside the Pentecostal circles, Catholicism for some is seen as a bad word equal to the F word. You don’t want to push her. Be there as a good friend and be willing to answer her questions to the best of your ability. If you can’t answer her questions, there are a forms on this site that can help her. For example the converts one.

Unfortunately being a Catholic means that you are also part of the most misunderstood, and most attacked Christian denomination. At least that’s what I’ve experienced and I’m not even Catholic yet.
 
Thank you all for your imput.

I’ve saved the article and would really like to send it at one point. I don’t expect her to just abandon her current community but it might make her think about what they believe and that bad old Catholicism can challenge that. I’ve never been tempted to speak to her about these things so this feeling of urgency today is definitely something that i shouldn’t ignore.
I’m going to compose a nice email, ask her to read it so she can explain some things I don’t understand about her beliefs. I’m not going to go into any specific things that I outlined previously, unless a discussion develops later on. In that case I’m going to rely on this forum a lot 🙂
She’ll probably see this as an opportunity to evangelise me and I’ll be very surprised if she doesn’t respond.

I really hope she returns to church at some point. This community has branwashed her quite a bit. For example, they are against hierarchy but the guy who has started it is in charge. I find it all very weird.
 
I have a friend of some 30 some odd years that in the 70’s became born again. Throughout the years she has sent me literature for me to read so I would leave the Catholic Church and “see the light”. For the most part I find this amusing but sometimes I am somewhat offened by her insistance.

She always asks me for feedback and honestly, I never respond. I file the literature in the trash where it belongs. I don’t respond because I don’t want her to be offended—I love her as a long time friend.

I would file that article in a folder because I will guarantee you that since she is born again it is her duty to convert you to her Bible thumping church and save your soul.

Personally, I think just sending her this article and/or others could be offensive to her. If she is not trying to convert you I would just let it lie until she starts sending you articles and she will. Then I would definately send it to her which will open the doors of communication and you will be able to educate her on Catholicism.
 
horselvr said:
I have a friend of some 30 some odd years that in the 70’s became born again. Throughout the years she has sent me literature for me to read so I would leave the Catholic Church and “see the light”. For the most part I find this amusing but sometimes I am somewhat offened by her insistance.

She always asks me for feedback and honestly, I never respond. I file the literature in the trash where it belongs. I don’t respond because I don’t want her to be offended—I love her as a long time friend.
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Your offended; yet, when your longtime friend asks you for feedback you give her nothing on the pretext of not offending her? So you both know there is something going on but not saying anything?
I would file that article in a folder because I will guarantee you that since she is born again it is her duty to convert you to her Bible thumping church and save your soul.
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To a born again person church does not mean the same as you mean it. She may like her church community but she wants you to be saved through Jesus. To understand this they use scripture, some nicely some not. Wouldn’t it be better to take her literature and prepare a response. There is quite a bit of info on this website in order to dialogue with her.
Personally, I think just sending her this article and/or others could be offensive to her. If she is not trying to convert you I would just let it lie until she starts sending you articles and she will. Then I would definately send it to her which will open the doors of communication and you will be able to educate her on Catholicism.
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This seems contradictory to what you did. Your friend is trying to convert you and yet you say nothing. Here you are saying to do nothing unless they are trying to convert you?

It seems to me you have been hurt and are somewhat confused by the offense. I’ve been on both sides of your situation. Do not be offended because your friend thinks you are not “saved” and not going to heaven. She doesn’t mean that you are a bad person. They look at themselves as trying to help a drowning person. Be thankful that she cares enough to try to reach out to you. Born again people see saved as believing and submitting to Jesus directly, not through a church and that being a good person doesn’t matter if you aren’t saved by Jesus.

There is plenty of material to explain how you do know Jesus if you don’t feel comfortable talking directly. Let your friend know how you feel.
 
I read the article. Very good. I’m also from the non-denom. background. You’ll note that the author of the article spent 3 years in a foreign country, and 6 months back home before they were ready to convert. One article won’t do much, I’d wager.

The best thing you can do is be a good Catholic and pray for your friend. Sending the article pales in comparison. It also will invite her to send you a bunch of anti-catholic stuff, probably opening the door to a lot of animosity.

I’d also not send it on the pretense “i have some questions about your protestantism” - - it’s a obvious thin veil. you’d be better to tell the truth, " i want you to come back home".
 
gtrenewed:

Hmmm I’m not sure how to answer you.

I do not want to offend her and quite honestly if we approach this subject she will be offended.

When I visited her I went to her church to be polite. When I didn’t go up to the alter for the alter call she was offended. This was at least 15yrs ago and to this day she will bring it up and express her feelings on it. When I asked if she would like to attend Mass with me she absolutely recoiled and declined.

When my son made his Confirmation she felt compelled to tell me that that was hogwash and won’t get him into Heaven. I remained silent because if I had not and expressed my beliefs and feelings she would have been offended.

"Your offended; yet, when your longtime friend asks you for feedback you give her nothing on the pretext of not offending her? "

Definition of pretext:
An ostensible or professed purpose; an excuse. An effort or strategy intended to conceal something. To allege as an excuse.

Trust me—this is no excuse or strategy to conceal anything. The last thing I want to do is offend her as she can be quite sensitive. Obviously, she doesn’t care if her anti Catholic literature offends me but that’s on her.

There is plenty of information and ways to access it without me explaining things to her.

I hope this explains things better for you.
 
horselvr said:
gtrenewed:

Hmmm I’m not sure how to answer you.

I do not want to offend her and quite honestly if we approach this subject she will be offended.

When I visited her I went to her church to be polite. When I didn’t go up to the alter for the alter call she was offended. This was at least 15yrs ago and to this day she will bring it up and express her feelings on it. When I asked if she would like to attend Mass with me she absolutely recoiled and declined.

When my son made his Confirmation she felt compelled to tell me that that was hogwash and won’t get him into Heaven. I remained silent because if I had not and expressed my beliefs and feelings she would have been offended.

"Your offended; yet, when your longtime friend asks you for feedback you give her nothing on the pretext of not offending her? "

Definition of pretext:
An ostensible or professed purpose; an excuse. An effort or strategy intended to conceal something. To allege as an excuse.

Trust me—this is no excuse or strategy to conceal anything. The last thing I want to do is offend her as she can be quite sensitive. Obviously, she doesn’t care if her anti Catholic literature offends me but that’s on her.

There is plenty of information and ways to access it without me explaining things to her.

I hope this explains things better for you.
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Thanks, I know it is hard to include everything in a post, that is why I responded because it seemed there was more.

You are a better person than me in maintaining your friendship to someone who has rejected you this way, especially your sons confirmation celebration and not responding at all. It is curious to me but God made different temperments for a reason.

God Bless.
 
Actually, saying I don’t want to offend her is an understatement—to be more correct—to actually lay out Catholicism to her from the early Church on, which does not agree with what she is learning as a BAC, would crush her world emotionally and mentally and I won’t be part of that.

We have been through an awful lot as close friends. In particular her two suicide attempts. She called me both times which resulted in taking her to a mental health hospital where she stayed until she “felt” better and her insurance held out. This was in the mid 70’s and shortly there after she found God and a BAC church and so far is better. She still has feelings of ending things when she has difficulty in coping.

We now live many states away from each other and when she feels like her fingers are slipping from the ledge, she reads her bible and speaks with her minister.

While she does make some rude comments concerning Catholicism, the Sacraments, it is through ignorance and not because she is trying to hurt me. I feel that hopefully, since my feedback is non-existant, she will research things for herself, at her pace, to where she will be able to handle the teachings without having the rug pulled out from under her in one fell swoop. She would not be able to handle that emotionally and I don’t want something like that on my conscience either. If the time ever came when she did ask me a question concening Catholicism (instead of just criticising it) I would first ask for help in choosing my words very wisely so as not to turn her world upside down.

For the time being she is able to cope with life as she is—a BAC.
 
horselvr,
What is a BAC church exactly?? I googled it and I got some Vietnamese Catholic church in Hanoi. I have a feeling that’s not the church. Do you mean born again Christian? For the sake of friendship I understand totally why you want to keep quiet but at the same time, you could also be feeding her need to convert you into her faith. Also some of the misinformation the denominations have is stemmed from dishearted Catholics who left, and some of it was true about thirty years ago, but it isn’t the case today. I realise that this is a sensitive issue so you have to walk carefully and loving. It can’t also be brushed under the carpet either. How much does her attitude regarding your faith bother you? Thirty years is a long time to not only have a friendship but also handle the anti-catholic attitude.

It’s hard when people don’t understand your faith. Have you looked into Catholic Apologetics??? It’s designed to help one defend their faith. There are also some really good books out there that can help you at least understand not only your denomination but hers as well. I’ve included the titles below.

Mary – A Catholic/Evangelical Debate
More Christianity
Christianity Pure & Simple
By Dwight Longenecker

If she is sending you the information it just means she cares and wants to save your soul. Some believe that Catholics aren’t Christian and I hate to say this but for some, it’s a religion and not an active faith. Catholicism can be lived two ways: as a religion or as an active Christ seeking journey. Both are Christian but they are two different entities. If your friend is bothering you about this, why don’t you start standing up for your faith in a simple way by clarifying some things in a sentence or two or at least be willing to answer her questions instead of ignoring it. You can also refer her to this book:
**Why Do Catholics Genuflect?: And Answers to Other Puzzling Questions About the Catholic Church by Al Kresta **

It answers alot of questions people have about the Catholic Church. I don’t think you should rely on her to do her own research because some denominations teach, the bible is enough and can discourage her from doing her own research. After she has read it, ask her to read the above books as well. Or you can even say, I’ve bought one of the books (I would pray for guidance over which book or ask her to pick one) and ask if she would like to read it together. That way, you are fostering friendship and opening the doors for communication. It’s important to emphazie friendship and love throughout this. I don’t want this to break the friendship but if something isn’t done, it may continue to put a strain on it as well.

These are a few suggestions but in the end before you do anything, pray about it and see where God leads. Also don’t be too hard on some of the born agains, they truly display their love for our God and they aren’t afraid to show it nor talk about it. These are two areas where Catholics can truly learn from them. I’m a born again so I know.
 
hrwilliams said:
The entire time, I was never worried about his faith in Jesus Christ our dead and risen savior, the only Son of God. And obviously, holy living wasn’t an issue, either. If that’s the case with your friend, please leave it alone. There’s no fanatic like a convert. Once the dust settles and your friend matures spiritually, you’ll be able to talk about other theological issues without doing more damage than good.
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I like this advice.🙂
 
OP: I apologize if this thread has become a matter between me and a friend but I do want to answer secregarden. If anyone has any further questions they’d like to ask me then please start a thread of your own and I will gladly respond. This way the OP can have this thread answered.

Thanks Secret Garden for your concern and also the suggested readings.

However, I think I may have confused you or possibly you have mis-read my post.

Personally, I am ready, at the drop of a hat, to defend Catholicism. I absolutely love my faith and would rather die than have to be anything else. I find my religion so incredibly beautiful.

You keep saying I am ignoring my friends questions concerning Catholicism. Here’s the point:

She never asks questions. There are only criticisms from her.

An example of this is the other day during a phone conversation she was expressing her dislike of her sister-in-law and how unchristian she is in her words and actions and then she adds: “AND she’s a Catholic, small wonder–yea right, she sits in her confessional booth and confesses whatever”.

She has made quite a few reference about us confessing sins to a Priest and her distain over this. There is a bit of hardness to her when speaking about Catholics.

I did say, “Now, neither you nor I know what she confesses and what she does not confess since we aren’t in the confessional with her and frankly I don’t know what you confess to God either.”

Now to answer a few of your questions/remarks:

As far as my silence giving her a reason to convert me—she’s known me for a long time and she knows I am Catholic through and through and would rather drink bleach than become a Born Again Christian (BAC) or anything else for that matter.

Here’s what’s bothering me:

I do not criticize her beliefs being a born again christian (BAC). Whatever makes her sleep at night and not slit her wrists is fine by me. I would hope I could expect the same.

To say that born agains, truly display their love for our God and they aren’t afraid to show it nor talk about it and that these are two areas where Catholics can truly learn from them–Well,----borders on insulting by the way.
 
OP: I apologize if this thread has become a matter between me and a friend but I do want to answer secregarden. If anyone has any further questions they’d like to ask me then please start a thread of your own and I will gladly respond. This way the OP can have this thread answered.

Thanks Secret Garden for your concern and also the suggested readings.

However, I think I may have confused you or possibly you have mis-read my post.

Personally, I am ready, at the drop of a hat, to defend Catholicism. I absolutely love my faith and would rather die than have to be anything else. I find my religion so incredibly beautiful.

You keep saying I am ignoring my friends questions concerning Catholicism. Here’s the point:

My friends emotional state is fragile and she finds solace in being a BAC and I don’t want to shake her beliefs—I thought I made that clear. Equally as important is the fact that she never asks questions. There are only criticisms from her.

An example of this is the other day during a phone conversation she was expressing her dislike of her sister-in-law and how unchristian she is in her words and actions and then she adds: “AND she’s a Catholic, small wonder–yea right, she sits in her confessional booth and confesses whatever”.

She has made quite a few reference about us confessing sins to a Priest and her distain over this. There is a bit of hardness to her when speaking about Catholics.

I did say, “Now, neither you nor I know what she confesses and what she does not confess since we aren’t in the confessional with her and frankly I don’t know what you confess to God either.”

Now to answer a few of your questions/remarks:

As far as my silence giving her a reason to convert me—she’s known me for a long time and she knows I am Catholic through and through and would rather drink bleach than become a Born Again Christian (BAC) or anything else for that matter.

Here’s what’s bothering me:

I do not criticize her beliefs being a born again christian (BAC). Whatever makes her sleep at night and not slit her wrists is fine by me. I would hope I could expect the same.

To say that born agains, truly display their love for our God and they aren’t afraid to show it nor talk about it and that these are two areas where Catholics can truly learn from them–Well,----borders on insulting by the way.
 
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