Should I tell my partner?

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bryndon

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Me and my girlfriend are relatively young, in our early twenties, and I’d say we have a wholesome relationship.
Recently, I’ve had an encounter with a girl on Facebook chat. The interaction was not very long, as I cut it off, but during it we flirted, and the conversation was implicitly sexual. When she asked if we could call, that’s when I caught myself, and stopped the conversation.
I am going to confess the illicit conversation to a priest, but I’m wondering, should I confess this to my girlfriend as well?
 
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No. That is what confession is for. Your girlfriend is not your confessor.
 
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All you would do is hurt her if you told her. You realized what was happening and cut it off. Learn from this and guard against it again.
 
If you want her to break up with you, you should definitely tell her! But I assume you don’t, so no, no need to tell her.

However, you should look inside your heart and ask why you were flirting with someone else at all.
 
Don’t tell her. But if you’re prone to cheating and don’t honestly love her, do yourselves both a favor and break it off.
 
agreed, was it an honest mistake? or is there some unaddressed issue in your relationship? you don’t have totell us, but at least give it some thought, the answer to that will most likely determine if this needs to be brought up to your girlfriend at all
 
Because he didn’t do anything except talk to someone. She has a say all the time. She is free to break up with him at any time.

I did tell him to examine the reasons why he is talking/flirting with someone else…
 
Do not tell your girlfriend.

Confess it and don’t do it again.
 
Irishmom2 said:
Because he didn’t do anything except talk to someone. She has a say all the time. She is free to break up with him at any time.
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If him flirting with somebody else would cause her to break up with him she has a right to know.

You explicitly advised him not to say anything unless he wants her to break up with him. That should be her call, especially when she has the freedom to find somebody else.
 
I did say that. And I think most people knew that I said that sarcastically.
 
Irishmom2 said:
I did say that. And I think most people knew that I said that sarcastically.
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I certainly didn’t take it as sarcastic. I believe it’s the real reason behind the advice not to tell.
 
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Irishmom2 said:
What would he confess? That he flirted with someone?
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Matthew 5:27-28… even if you think.

That’s what he would be confessing to his confessor.

I agree with you, he also need to seriously examine why he was flirty in the first place. That’s why we have an examination of conscious… right?

Then he needs to know his girlfriend well enough to know if she deserves to know. I always tell my boyfriend give me the choice. Talk to me. I know we are all human with human nature desires. Dont make me feel stupid, when I find out you did things behind my back. That would hurt more.

In other words dont be a coward if what you did wasnt a big deal then you shouldn’t be afraid to talk to me about it
 
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I think it’s awful advice that he should tell his girlfriend about it.

One may as well prepare a list of ones secret sins to hand out to all potential partners.
 
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JohnWithFries said:
One may as well prepare a list of ones secret sins to hand out to all potential partners.
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I would consider this a sin against her and therefore think she has a right to know. Especially when finding someone else is a moral option for her if leaving is what she chooses to do.
 
He doesn’t have an obligation to tell her, it doesn’t concern her and it would harm his relationship. He made a mistake, and cares enough about it to post here and go to confession.
 
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