sin or scruples

  • Thread starter Thread starter backtocatholic
  • Start date Start date
Status
Not open for further replies.
B

backtocatholic

Guest
Hi there.

I have a problem with scruples where I get a thought that something is a mortal sin (normally something I get out of context) and I have to prove to myself that it isn’t. However once I’ve solved the problem in my head I start to worry that it is a mortal sin and have to go through the whole process again. My common sense and my conscience tells me that the decision I’m making is fine but my scruples are looking for certainty in everything.

In one case my scruples began to doubt that something might be a mortal sin but I thought to myself that I’d follow my conscience in this situation as I knew in my heart it would be the right thing to do. I’ve since realized that it was not a mortal sin.

I started worrying about occasions of sin in relation to my teenagers and was literally at the point of wondering if I could let them out at all. I have spoken to a priest and he has given me good advice which fits in with good practical parenting. He really confirmed what I intended to do anyhow. Before I met the priest I had a thought that it wouldn’t be practical to restrict my kids to that level so I’d made my decision before the priest had confirmed that it wasn’t a mortal sin.

Did I commit a mortal sin by making a decision to follow my conscience even though I couldn’t prove to myself that it wasn’t a mortal sin.
 
General brief info about mortal sin:

From the Compendium issued by Pope Benedict XVI
  1. When does one commit a mortal sin?
One commits a mortal sin when there are simultaneously present: grave matter, full knowledge, and deliberate consent.
  1. When does one commit a venial sin?
One commits a venial sin, which is essentially different from a mortal sin, when the matter involved is less serious or, even if it is grave, when full knowledge or complete consent are absent.

vatican.va/archive/compendium_ccc/documents/archive_2005_compendium-ccc_en.html
 
I will re -post a past post of mine

A person struggles with scruples - what ought they do?

A person with scrupulosity --ought to have a* “regular confessor” who can direct them --and even give them some general principles* to follow -to apply (principles for them due to their particular scruples -they are usually not for those with a normal conscience).

Thus with their direction they can “dismiss scruples” (in the older language despise them) - “act against them”.

Scruples are to be dismissed ~ not argued with.

To borrow and image from a Carthusian from centuries ago: Scruples *are like a barking dog or a hissing goose -one does not stop to argue with a barking dog or a hissing goose does one? * No one keeps walking.

Such ‘obedience’ to a regular confessor who knows of ones scruples (except in what is manifest sin - such as if he told them it was ok to murder someone or something certain like that) is key. Such is the age old practice.

Also counseling - could be helpful depending on the case -but one would want to look for a counselor who can assist one in following the Churches Teachings - not go contrary to them (I have heard CA staff mention catholictherapists.com/)

Here was a recent post from Jimmy Akin of CA that I saw in the Register and saved for those who struggle with such.

ncregister.com/blog/jimmy-akin/6-tools-for-the-scrupulous
So bottom line: seek out a “regular confessor” and perhaps print this up and discuss with him.
 
bottom line: seek out a “regular confessor” and perhaps print up that last post I posted and discuss with him.
 
I will re -post a past post of mine

A person struggles with scruples - what ought they do?

A person with scrupulosity --ought to have a* “regular confessor” who can direct them --and even give them some general principles* to follow -to apply (principles for them due to their particular scruples -they are usually not for those with a normal conscience).

Thus with their direction they can “dismiss scruples” (in the older language despise them) - “act against them”.

Scruples are to be dismissed ~ not argued with.

To borrow and image from a Carthusian from centuries ago: Scruples *are like a barking dog or a hissing goose -one does not stop to argue with a barking dog or a hissing goose does one? * No one keeps walking.

Such ‘obedience’ to a regular confessor who knows of ones scruples (except in what is manifest sin - such as if he told them it was ok to murder someone or something certain like that) is key. Such is the age old practice.

Also counseling - could be helpful depending on the case -but one would want to look for a counselor who can assist one in following the Churches Teachings - not go contrary to them (I have heard CA staff mention catholictherapists.com/)

Here was a recent post from Jimmy Akin of CA that I saw in the Register and saved for those who struggle with such.

ncregister.com/blog/jimmy-akin/6-tools-for-the-scrupulous
So bottom line: seek out a “regular confessor” and perhaps print this post up and discuss with him.
 
I suggest you ask for the intersession of St. Alphonsus and read what he has to say about scrupulosity and how to act when we have doubts of conscience.
 
backtocatholic said:
Hi there.

I have a problem with scruples where I get a thought that something is a mortal sin (normally something I get out of context) and I have to prove to myself that it isn’t. However once I’ve solved the problem in my head I start to worry that it is a mortal sin and have to go through the whole process again. My common sense and my conscience tells me that the decision I’m making is fine but my scruples are looking for certainty in everything.

In one case my scruples began to doubt that something might be a mortal sin but I thought to myself that I’d follow my conscience in this situation as I knew in my heart it would be the right thing to do. I’ve since realized that it was not a mortal sin.

I started worrying about occasions of sin in relation to my teenagers and was literally at the point of wondering if I could let them out at all. I have spoken to a priest and he has given me good advice which fits in with good practical parenting. He really confirmed what I intended to do anyhow. Before I met the priest I had a thought that it wouldn’t be practical to restrict my kids to that level so I’d made my decision before the priest had confirmed that it wasn’t a mortal sin.

Did I commit a mortal sin by making a decision to follow my conscience even though I couldn’t prove to myself that it wasn’t a mortal sin.
Click to expand...
Please get professional help from this trusted priest for scrupulosity and anxiety, perhaps a mental health professional too.

This is a serious level of second guessing, overthinking, compulsive thinking, and scruples. You really need help outside coming here to (again) second guess the second guess. This is not helpful. It feeds the compulsion.
 
Usually if you have to ask the question in the title of the thread the answer is almost always, “Scruples”
 
mission.liguori.org/newsletters/pdf_archive/Ten_Commandments_for_the_Scrupulous_2013.pdf

Note number 9:
“When you are doubtful, you shall
assume that the act of commission or
omission you’re in doubt about is not
sinful, and you shall proceed without
dread of sin.”

And he explains the Commandment: (you can just click on the link and not strain your eyes reading this… if you want to) 😉

“The purpose of this commandment is to free us from the
paralyzing fear and anxiety that are oft en part of scrupulosity.
St. Alphonsus says, “Scrupulous persons tend
to fear that everything they do is sinful. Th e confessor
should command them to act without restraint and to
overcome their anxiety.”
In other words, people in the grip of fear and anxiety
caused by scrupulosity should deliberately act against the
impulse that paralyzes them and instead choose a path
that could lead to health and freedom.
Alphonsus continues, “Th e confessor may command
the scrupulous to conquer their anxiety and disregard it
by freely doing whatever it tells them not to do. Th e confessor
may assure the penitent that he or she need never
confess such a thing.”
Alphonsus says the paralyzing experience of rigidity
and anxiety is based on “groundless fear.” The fear and
anxiety are not guilt or remorse felt as a result of an action
or inaction on the part of the penitent. Th e fear and the
anxiety are merely symptoms of scrupulosity.
The inability to judge the difference between the reality
of sin and the fear of sin is a symptom of scrupulosity. St.
Alphonsus says that when this happens, both the confessor
and the penitent should presume that the power of
grace is at work in the life of God’s people and not assume
there is sin where no sin has occurred.
To sum it up: When making assumptions, assume
grace, not sin.”

And please talk to a good confessor about this. I got one, and I’ve made HUGE strides in overcoming this disease.
 
backtocatholic said:
Hi there.

I have a problem with scruples where I get a thought that something is a mortal sin (normally something I get out of context) and I have to prove to myself that it isn’t. However once I’ve solved the problem in my head I start to worry that it is a mortal sin and have to go through the whole process again. My common sense and my conscience tells me that the decision I’m making is fine but my scruples are looking for certainty in everything.

In one case my scruples began to doubt that something might be a mortal sin but I thought to myself that I’d follow my conscience in this situation as I knew in my heart it would be the right thing to do. I’ve since realized that it was not a mortal sin.

I started worrying about occasions of sin in relation to my teenagers and was literally at the point of wondering if I could let them out at all. I have spoken to a priest and he has given me good advice which fits in with good practical parenting. He really confirmed what I intended to do anyhow. Before I met the priest I had a thought that it wouldn’t be practical to restrict my kids to that level so I’d made my decision before the priest had confirmed that it wasn’t a mortal sin.
Click to expand...
You should check out Scrupulous Anonymous. Go to:
mission.liguori.org/newsletters/index.html

Then scroll down and select the PDF file “Ten Commandments for the Scrupulous (2013)”

You can just read the various other publications from this site or sign up for the monthly newsletter, but scrupulosity can really interfere with your relationship with God because you are not viewing Him as a loving God, but instead a punishing God. This site is very insightful for those who are just wondering if they are scrupulous and just new to the Catholic Faith and the Confessional. Also, if you find yourself deliberately and often seeking out different Confessors and Spiritual Directors without the others knowledge then that is a symptom of being too scrupulous.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Back
Top