Sinful thoughts not acted upon

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Tommy999

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Hello all,
Sometimes I have sinful thoughts although I wish with all my heart that I didn’t have them.

For example, if I see a sexy woman on TV or in real life I sometimes have inappropriate thoughts about her, but I don’t act on it. If someone cuts me off in traffic or flips me off, I sometimes have unpleasant thoughts pop in my head about them, like temporarily wishing something bad would happen to them – but I don’t act on it. By my outward response, these people wouldn’t even know I am thinking these thoughts.

These sinful thoughts only last a few seconds until I come to my senses and realize that my love for Christ and desire to follow God is greater than doing something I would later regret. I ask God to forgive me and I feel He does.

**Just curious what the Catholic perspective is on this sort of thing. **

Is it a sin to have these thoughts in the first place or is it only a sin if they result in actual outward sinful behavior like propositioning the woman or challenging the guy who cut me off in traffic to a fistfight? I apologize if this is a unique issue that only affects me and nobody else.
 
Tommy999 said:
Hello all,
Sometimes I have sinful thoughts although I wish with all my heart that I didn’t have them…
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You cannot be sure that what you experience as your thought is yours. That could be Satan’s influence! Satan is very strong and know many ways to confuse, tempt, etc. us. Those thoughts could be yours also so you can never be sure what is what! You need to do a lot of practice to understand which thought is yours or not but at the end it is up to Satan to leave you. There is nothing we can do about this!
 
My confessor once told me that we can’t help the crazy thoughts that come into our heads…the thing to do is immediately say a silent prayer and banish them.

Something like, “Lord Jesus Christ, have mercy on me, a sinner”.

Or something similar
God bless you Tommy 🙂
 
pianistclare said:
My confessor once told me that we can’t help the crazy thoughts that come into our heads…the thing to do is immediately say a silent prayer and banish them.

Something like, “Lord Jesus Christ, have mercy on me, a sinner”.

Or something similar
God bless you Tommy 🙂
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Thanks, Clare. Good advice! I like the idea of asking to banish them. I already do most of the rest of the stuff.
 
Can’t speak to the catholic perspective but I can guarantee that you are not unique in the instances you wrote of. Maybe in other ways but not those 🙂 Then again maybe so if you are wishing something bad would happen to someone?
 
puzzledtoo said:
Can’t speak to the catholic perspective but I can guarantee that you are not unique in the instances you wrote of. Maybe in other ways but not those 🙂 Then again maybe so if you are wishing something bad would happen to someone?
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Thanks, puzzledtoo. I don’t always feel that way (hoping something bad would happen to someone) but when I do, it usually only lasts for a few seconds before I realize I was wrong to feel that way and simmer down and ask God for forgiveness for thinking that way in the first place. .

I also generally pray for the person who offended me and I pray for their soul and that they would come to know Christ if they don’t already, as in “*Forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us” * in the Lord’s Prayer.

I just wish the bad thoughts wouldn’t come my way in the first place. I think it may be just my sinful fallen human nature that kicks in from time to time. I used to think those bad thoughts a lot more when I was younger than I do now but unfortunately they have not been totally eliminated.
 
Thoughts just pop up…you can’t control those. However, you can control if you dwell on them or not.

Sin requires an act of the will. So if you have a lustful thought (that just pops up) and choose to continue that train of thought even after your rational brain/conscience kicks in, then it is a sin. If – when you realize the thought in inappropriate – you stop that line of thought, then you are not sinning. That’s my understanding anyways!
 
Garyjohn2 said:
Thoughts just pop up…you can’t control those. However, you can control if you dwell on them or not.

Sin requires an act of the will. So if you have a lustful thought (that just pops up) and choose to continue that train of thought even after your rational brain/conscience kicks in, then it is a sin. If – when you realize the thought in inappropriate – you stop that line of thought, then you are not sinning. That’s my understanding anyways!
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Makes sense, Garyjohn2 (not to be confused with JimmyJohn :)). In the case of the former, I change the TV channel or try to look away. In the latter, I try to pray for the person’s spiritual welfare who offended me in some way.
 
You’re certainly not alone in having those thoughts and feelings!

Feelings just are… they aren’t something we have a lot of control over. We don’t usually get to choose how we initially feel about something, especially if it’s somewhat unexpected (being cut off in traffic, for instance). But, especially when bad thoughts start springing from those feelings, we need to decide what to do with them–we need to make a choice.

As long as you’re not entertaining the negative thoughts, encouraging them, or lingering on them, you’re not sinning. It sounds like as soon as you realize what you’re thinking, you’re trying to get rid of those thoughts, and replacing them with prayer and forgiveness, and that’s exactly what we should do. Keep in mind, too, that it’s not a bad thing to desire justice for wrongdoing, especially if it means the offender may learn from the experience for their own benefit (and for others around them). But we should not wish evil or vengeance on the person–and that’s where the temptation often lies.

If it bothers you a lot, you may want to ask your priest or spiritual director for more specific advice in how to handle it when those thoughts arise. Although, IMHO, it sounds like you’re handling it very well! 👍
 
Temptations that pop into our head are just that…temptations. If however, you allow them to entertain you and further them with your imagination, then that is sin, even before you decide to act on them.
(In other words, one can already sin in their imagination, when they consent to the thoughts).
 
Sounds pretty much like the rest of us. When it happens to me (which is frequently) then I just try to straighten up, snap myself out of it, and say a little prayer for God’s mercy.
 
CatholicRaven said:
You’re certainly not alone in having those thoughts and feelings!

Feelings just are… they aren’t something we have a lot of control over. We don’t usually get to choose how we initially feel about something, especially if it’s somewhat unexpected (being cut off in traffic, for instance). But, especially when bad thoughts start springing from those feelings, we need to decide what to do with them–we need to make a choice.

As long as you’re not entertaining the negative thoughts, encouraging them, or lingering on them, you’re not sinning. It sounds like as soon as you realize what you’re thinking, you’re trying to get rid of those thoughts, and replacing them with prayer and forgiveness, and that’s exactly what we should do. Keep in mind, too, that it’s not a bad thing to desire justice for wrongdoing, especially if it means the offender may learn from the experience for their own benefit (and for others around them). But we should not wish evil or vengeance on the person–and that’s where the temptation often lies.

If it bothers you a lot, you may want to ask your priest or spiritual director for more specific advice in how to handle it when those thoughts arise. Although, IMHO, it sounds like you’re handling it very well! 👍
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Thanks, CatholicRaven. I agree 100%. I do my best to not entertain or encourage these thoughts. In fact, I am mostly embarrassed by them and was reluctant to even bring this subject up. Just curious how common this was and how other folks handle it.
 
Dorothy said:
Temptations that pop into our head are just that…temptations. If however, you allow them to entertain you and further them with your imagination, then that is sin, even before you decide to act on them.
(In other words, one can already sin in their imagination, when they consent to the thoughts).
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Makes sense, Dorothy. Thank you. Sometimes my imagination gets going before I can say, “Whoa”.

My goal (I’m not there yet but working on it with God’s help) is to realize Philippians 4:8:

"Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable–if anything is excellent or praiseworthy–think about such things".

Please pray for me.
 
I see a lot of responses about how much time you spend thinking of the bad thought or action. As if that made a difference? If you have the thought, sure, don’t dwell on it, but that doesn’t mean it was ok in the first place as long as you quickly think something else.

Matthew 5:28

*But I say to you, everyone who looks at a woman with lust has already committed adultery with her in his heart. *

Those are the words of Jesus. I don’t see a ‘quickly think another way and it’s alright’ answer here. It is a sin and one we a lot of times just can’t seem to control.
 
I also struggle with impure thoughts. Jesus is very clear on this matter.

New American Standard Bible Luke 7:28
but I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lust for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart.

When I find myself entertaining impure thoughts or having feelings of impatience or anger towards others I pray the Jesus Prayer. "Lord Jesus, Son on the Living God, have mercy on me a sinner. I find it very helpful.
 
It’s not about the length of time of the thoughts or that the thoughts are “okay” if we think something else. It’s about how the person handles them, what the intent is–and what lust is.

Now, I don’t think anyone here is saying unwanted sexual or angry thoughts are good or that we shouldn’t try to guard against them and have fewer of them (by avoiding temptation and practicing chastity, for instance).

I am simply saying, as Garyjohn2 said, that a person’s sin is an act of the will. So though the thoughts may be grave matter, that doesn’t necessarily mean the person has sinned by having them. Does that make more sense?

Lust is a choice. It’s not just attraction or noticing beauty or even being aroused or having a sexual thought pop into your head unbidden. Those things are not necessarily sins, while lust is.

CCC 2351 Lust is disordered desire for or inordinate enjoyment of sexual pleasure. Sexual pleasure is morally disordered when sought for itself, isolated from its procreative and unitive purposes.​

I’m willing to concede that it’s possible for many people that some of those unwanted thoughts may be venial sins, but I’m not entirely convinced on that point, because it sounds as though we still must make the choice to disobey the moral law. :confused:

CCC 1862 One commits venial sin when, in a less serious matter, he does not observe the standard prescribed by the moral law, or when he disobeys the moral law in a grave matter, but without full knowledge or without complete consent.​

Entertaining those thoughts is a choice, and a sin. It seems to me we all agree with that. 🙂
 
pianistclare said:
My confessor once told me that we can’t help the crazy thoughts that come into our heads…the thing to do is immediately say a silent prayer and banish them.

Something like, “Lord Jesus Christ, have mercy on me, a sinner”.

Or something similar
God bless you Tommy 🙂
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I have also heard that simply saying “May these thoughts leave my mind in the name of Jesus Christ” works as well.

Although its said when we even think of lust, we are already guilty of the sin, before we choose to act on it or not, so Im not sure if this applies to all sins or just lust/ sexual sins.

That doesnt seem correct to me though, if that were true, if someone was already guilty of lust, why refrain from doing the actual physical part? Seems like we should ‘get some credit’ for restraint, even though the thoughts are constantly there in your head.
 
Tommy999 said:
Hello all,
Sometimes I have sinful thoughts although I wish with all my heart that I didn’t have them.

For example, if I see a sexy woman on TV or in real life I sometimes have inappropriate thoughts about her, but I don’t act on it. If someone cuts me off in traffic or flips me off, I sometimes have unpleasant thoughts pop in my head about them, like temporarily wishing something bad would happen to them – but I don’t act on it. By my outward response, these people wouldn’t even know I am thinking these thoughts.

These sinful thoughts only last a few seconds until I come to my senses and realize that my love for Christ and desire to follow God is greater than doing something I would later regret. I ask God to forgive me and I feel He does.

**Just curious what the Catholic perspective is on this sort of thing. **

Is it a sin to have these thoughts in the first place or is it only a sin if they result in actual outward sinful behavior like propositioning the woman or challenging the guy who cut me off in traffic to a fistfight? I apologize if this is a unique issue that only affects me and nobody else.
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Lol. My personal opinion is that your reactions are simply evidence of human behavior. I do not like calling it sinful. I am sure there are some people who resist these evil thoughts. Thoughts are the most difficult things to police or discern to be honest. Obviously it is good you did not act on any of these thoughts.
 
Tommy999 said:
Makes sense, Dorothy. Thank you. Sometimes my imagination gets going before I can say, “Whoa”.

My goal (I’m not there yet but working on it with God’s help) is to realize Philippians 4:8:

"Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable–if anything is excellent or praiseworthy–think about such things".

Please pray for me.
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I will put your name on my prayer list.

God bless you!
 
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