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marieconfirm
Guest
Is it a sin to pray to not be pregnant?
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free_thinker
Guest
Not at all! If you are not ready for a child, then it’s good not to have one. If you are not ready to have children, I seriously hope you are on some type of birth control so that it doesn’t happen.
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whm
Guest
We should always strive to align our will with God’s Will for us. But if you are not sure if you are pregnant, I do not think is a problem to pray that you are not, taking into account my former statement.
Note that this advice from free_thinker goes against Church doctrine.
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free_thinker
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So what if she gets pregnant and isn’t ready? Isn’t having an abortion against church doctrine too? I think it’s much easier and less emotionally damaging to prevent the pregnancy in the first place than to have an abortion. And I am sorry, but NFP is a bunch of bunk. It’s the LEAST effective form of so-called birth control out there.
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EasterJoy
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Our Lord, faced with his Passion, prayed in this way:
He advanced a little and fell to the ground and prayed that if it were possible the hour might pass by him; he said, “Abba, Father, all things are possible to you. Take this cup away from me, but not what I will but what you will.” Mark 14:35-36
If you pray in that spirit, then yes, you may pray that God spare you from the blessing of children. If you have a serious reason, you may also abstain from sexual relations with your spouse by mutual decision in order to avoid pregnancy. You don’t have to have any serious reason to have a conversation with God about what the desires of your heart are. God knows your heart, but it will do you good to share it with him at length. Pour yourself out in prayer, and dare to do it honestly. That is a good thing.
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pensmama87
Guest
If you’re talking about those handy little charts of birth control effectiveness in the gynecologist’s office, they combine NFP with methods like withdrawal and rhythm method/standard days method, which are notoriously unreliable, and call it all “NFP.”
Look up NFP under its secular name - fertility awareness method - and you’ll find out that it’s much more reliable than you think.
To answer the OP’s question, of course it is not sinful. I love what EasterJoy said, and that was the exact verse my mind went to. I will be praying for you too. Be open to whatever blessing God has given you, and keep Him close to you. :hug1:
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EasterJoy
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Have you ever had catechesis concerning the Church’s view of marriage and sexuality that went beyond a list of what is forbidden? You do not write as if you do. Free thinking is a good thing, but it goes better if the thinker goes to the trouble of getting educated correctly, and uses his freedom so that he might know how to act according to the best nature of humankind instead of using it as if freedom and license were the same thing. (You know that they are not, right?)
One of the purposes of marriage is procreation, and the gift of children are among the goods around which marriage is ordered. There is a reason that sexual intercourse is called “the marital act.” Parenthood requires sacrifice, but it is also a blessing that follows from the marital act. Additionally, we do not avoid abortion because it is “hard” or “emotionally damaging” to go through with one, even though it most certainly is. We avoid abortion because it is the taking of an innocent life. The OP did not indicate that she would do any such thing in a million years.
Of course, if she is unmarried and unready to have children, it might be best if she were to remain chaste and single, and devote herself to the Lord’s work until she is ready to be both a wife and mother. That is also totally OK. Certainly if she has had sex outside of marriage, it is OK to hope that pregnancy doesn’t follow as a consequence, for the child’s sake as well as for the difficulty it would place on her. She needs to repent and amend herself, but she does nothing wrong by hoping to avoid the cross of going through pregnancy as a woman without a husband.
As for “effectiveness,” it is an elementary moral axiom that only moral means may be employed even to reach a moral end. If we could “effectively” reduce crime by draconian means, after all, that wouldn’t make those means “the best method,” would it?
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PennyinCanada
Guest
Why is the argument always ‘easier to prevent pregnancy than to have an abortion’? It’s never the other argument, ‘better to be chaste if not ready for pregnancy’ or ‘if pregnant, please consider adoption’? Not such a free thinker after all.
Have you ever been on NFP? I had no trouble telling when I was ovulating and I had very variable cycles. I knew when I ovulated, and my period came 12 to 13 days later to prove that I understood what was happening. I wish every young lady could take NFP as soon as her period starts so that she could have the benefit of understanding her body better and not having to have a ‘surprise’ every month or longer when things weren’t quite straightened out. I wish I did. Not to mention every young lady, engaged to be married, is already on the pill and can’t even comprehend that she could understand her cycle better. We have done a poor job at promoting NFP with our daughters, that much I’ll say.
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shelby_sun
Guest
Everyone has a different lives to live and all women have different bodies to deal with. My mother got pregnant with me while using NFP eight years after her fourth child was born. She was in no shape in any way to have another child and soon after I was born feel into a terrible alcohol addiction. She drank pretty much 24/7 for 7 years, causing a great of emotional and mental pain on my family. I cannot begin to tell you the negative effects it has had on my whole family. My mom knew she did not want or should not have another baby but as a catholic used NFP; of course she didn’t use it after that.Everyone has different situations and God understands that, even if some on this site don’t.
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PartoftheBody
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Your statement is simply factually incorrect. I invite you to review the peer-reviewed research on the subject, as I have. Try, for instance, ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/
Shelby, I’m sorry you grew up in the situation that you did. Please keep in mind, though, since nearly all methods of preventing pregnancy are not 100% effective (even things like tubal ligations and vasectomies are not 100%), you could have just as easily been conceived if your mom had tied her tubes, been on the pill, or been using some other artificial birth control. (I work in healthcare and you name it, I have seen a woman who got pregnant using that method. One woman had 3 pregnancies after her tubes were tied!)
Please remember you were planned by God, even if you weren’t planned by your parents.
As to the OP’s original question, I’m not sure praying for a child not to be conceived is a sin. I would take pause at praying for a miscarriage, though, if one was conceived. Perhaps a prayer such as this might be good:
"Lord, You know my situation and You know how difficult a pregnancy would be right now. If it is Your will that I should become pregnant, though, I ask You to give me the [strength, courage, peace, financial resources, etc…whatever is needed for the situation] to lovingly accept the pregnancy.
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marieconfirm
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I am a mother of 3 and just recently had my third my doctor urged me for an hour before my last c-section delivery to have my tubes tied (a lot of problems) I did not and decided to do NFP I then stopped having a period so I used it as a “free pass” and it was not so free I can not handle another child at this time, I do feel guilty praying that i am not pregnant but I do feel guilty about it… I don’t personally believe in birth control or sterilization (if I did things would be much much easier) I do believe in Gods will but sometimes to pray for what I want even when it doesn’t sound “good” I just feel guilty thank you so much for the comments I struggle to be a good follower but it can be hard sometimes when Gods plan isn’t exactly what we want
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marieconfirm
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Oh and yes I am married happily and I don’t think that abstaining from sex is an option I enjoy my personal life with my husband I just wish it wasn’t so stressful sometimes
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