Sins of the Tongue

[Carlton1993]

I understand that it is a sin, (detraction) to speak badly of people behind their backs, and also calumny to spead lies about people, and it is also a sin to reveal the hidden faults and sins of others,but are there exceptions to this? For example, if a child is telling his parents the wrong his sibling has committed, is this classed as revaling their hidden faults and sins? And if one is asked one’s opinion of another person, do we lie about it or tell the truth? And aslo, if we are asked to confirm the sin of another, and say that it took place, is this sinful, etc? I am having trouble controlling my words, and would gladly appreciate your comments and prayers. Thank You

 

[JimR-OCDS]

I understand that it is a sin, (detraction) to speak badly of people behind their backs, and also calumny to spead lies about people, and it is also a sin to reveal the hidden faults and sins of others,but are there exceptions to this? For example, if a child is telling his parents the wrong his sibling has committed, is this classed as revaling their hidden faults and sins? And if one is asked one’s opinion of another person, do we lie about it or tell the truth? And aslo, if we are asked to confirm the sin of another, and say that it took place, is this sinful, etc? I am having trouble controlling my words, and would gladly appreciate your comments and prayers. Thank You

It depends on the motive. A child telling his parents that his brother is playing with fire in his bedroom, is for the good of the brother, as well as the good of the entire family i.g.,… the kid could burn the house down. However, telling the parents about a petty offense just to make points for himself, of course the parent should correct the squealer.

Most gossip about other people, is done for to promote self-importance, at the expense of the person being talked about.
It is a sin to do so.

Jim

 

[LISA_Annette]

I understand that it is a sin, (detraction) to speak badly of people behind their backs, and also calumny to spead lies about people, and it is also a sin to reveal the hidden faults and sins of others,but are there exceptions to this? For example, if a child is telling his parents the wrong his sibling has committed, is this classed as revaling their hidden faults and sins?

Was it serious? If it was about how the other took an “extra cookie” after I specified not to, then I would consider that is not warranted, and is a small sin. But if my 13 yr old tells me that her older sister is smoking marijuana, this is for ultimate good–I want to know what is going on so that I can help.

And if one is asked one’s opinion of another person, do we lie about it or tell the truth?

You can always find something nice to say about someone. Everybody has faults and good points.
On the other hand, if my freind asked me,“so, what do you think of (name)?—should i date them??” If I knew they were an abusive person, I would say the truth.

And aslo, if we are asked to confirm the sin of another, and say that it took place, is this sinful, etc? I am having trouble controlling my words, and would gladly appreciate your comments and prayers. Thank You

Again, if the person who wants to know of the sin of another and telling them would ACTUALLY HELP them ( save them from some harm) then I would say something.

I am so happy that you care to ask these questions:thumbsup:

I don’t know how many times I have heard TRUE stuff aboutsomebody else that I wish I did not know—it did not help me one bit to know it. It makes me so unhappy to have someone spoil my perception of someone else when it wasn’t even neccessary It’s like a real downer whenever I see that person.

Just remember: Everybody is entitiled to a good image, even if they have made mistakes—maybe they are trying to change and it offers them some joy for others to think well of them. If you have to say something due to helping others from harm, then do it matter-of-factly.

I read the Kindness series by Lawrence G. Lovasik/ S.V.D. I needed help this way too You can do it ! I will definietly

 

[CarrieH]

For example, if a child is telling his parents the wrong his sibling has committed, is this classed as revaling their hidden faults and sins?

It depends upon their motivation for telling, and upon the seriousness of what the sibling was doing. If the child is simply tattling trivial things for the purpose of getting their sibling in trouble, that would be one thing, but if the child is reporting a serious matter (drug use, sexual activity, stealing, etc.), this is information that the parents need to know.

And if one is asked one’s opinion of another person, do we lie about it or tell the truth? And aslo, if we are asked to confirm the sin of another, and say that it took place, is this sinful, etc?

Once again, it depends on the circumstances. It is one thing to tell someone who has a right to know, and another to just gossip. If my boss comes to me and tells me that someone I know has applied for a position and asks for a reference, or if my friend comes to me and* really* wants to know what I think of her boyfriend because they are getting serious, then I feel that I owe them the truth. OTOH, if my coworkers are sitting in the break room and gossiping, and it’s none of their business, then it would be wrong to confirm what they are saying even if I do know the truth…unless the truth is to that person’s credit and I can come to their defense. Otherwise, a vague, “I have heard rumors to that effect, but it’s not my place to say anything either way. I guess you’ll have to ask them yourself” usually nips this in the bud.

I was the subject of some ugly rumors in the distant past, so I know how it feels. I have found that it’s best to live in such a manner that nobody would even believe such trash if it were told to them.

 

[FrankLawrence]

And if one is asked one’s opinion of another person, do we lie about it or tell the truth?

A way around that issue is by saying, “I believe that about 2,000 years ago, when Jesus died on the cross, He died for (insert person’s name here)'s sins, just as He died for my sins and for your sins.”

However, as another person mentioned, if there is an issue of urgency(ie daughter talking to a sleazy guy), then, if done for the benefit of the person receiving the information, we should tell the honest truth, yet do so in a charitable manner.

 

[LISA_Annette]

I read the Kindness series by Lawrence G. Lovasik/ S.V.D. I needed help this way too You can do it ! I will definietly

Gosh i forgot half of my sentence :whacky: I meant to say: I will definitely PRAY FOR YOU!!