So alone, please pray for me

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mouse333

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I just posted a “thank you” about my “God” voice and that it’s resolved and cleared up and persists sweetly.

However I am very alone.

I have worried at times that this voice was some sort of “imaginary friend” but it helps me so concretely, as I said in my “thank you”, that I have to believe that it somehow relates to the Divine.

However (is this a private revelation?) this morning He (?) was telling me that this was my purpose in the Kingdom of God, [an apostate Catholic psychotherapist asked me if I thought I even had any purpose in life] [and I didn’t even understand the question]:

well I guess I can’t say it here because maybe it is a private revelation. My God voice tells me lots of things but this was very profound.

A lot of it just entertains me and keeps my thoughts occupied and reassures me because I am so very alone. The condition I described in my “thank you” post, the painful glitches in my brain, which I have had for 25 years have made my life a hell to live, somehow I raised my son and stayed in a marriage but now that’s over, although my son is still nearby he is 21 and wants his freedom. My brain is destroyed by this condition and I have multiple physical issues as well, all of which make it impossible to form new relationships in my new area. I talk to people at the corner store (I perseverate over cigarettes when I have nothing to do, which is a lot of the time); otherwise I only have my mother and father. I feel that the Lord put my husband and I asunder because our marriage was somewhat illegitimate in the first place. But I miss him now more than anything and he won’t talk to me and I’m not interested, really, in forming new relationships. He was my whole world. I am so alone it is painful for others to see. They are kind to me at the pharmacy where I get my meds, including psych meds; but I just don’t seem to be able to form personal relationships any more, which makes me to scared to try to join a church. So I can’t even get my faith questions cleared up. I am frequently suicidal and continuously pray the Lord will take me.

I just feel all out. I have been alone a lot of my life but was always part of an institution. Now I am out in society alone and feel I have no place. My ex won’t talk to me, it was a thrill the one time he called me since last Christmas to say he would be coming here, but he didn’t, and although he has recently restored my on his phone (he had cut me off) he only takes messages and doesn’t respond except, sometimes, in my soul as he has a way of doing, but it is so uncertain.

Feel like I’m about to drop off the edge of the earth, wish I could.
 
Saint Michael, the archangel, defend us in battle, be our defense against the wickedness and snares of the devil, may God rebuke him, we humbly pray. And do you, O’ Prince of the Heavenly host, by the power of God thrust into Hell Satan and all the other evil spirits who prowl about the world for the ruin of souls.

Amen.

†

Our Father who art in Heaven, hallowed be thy name.

Thy kingdom come, thy will be done on Earth as it is in Heaven.

Give us this day our daily bread.

And forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us.

And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil.

Amen.

†

Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with thee.

Blessed are you among women, and blessed is the fruit of your womb Jesus.

Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners, now and at the hour of our death.

Amen.

†

Prayer to Our Lady of Mental Peace

O Lady of Mental Peace,
Mother of Tranquility
and Mother of Hope,
look upon mouse333 in this time
of weakness and unrest.

Teach her searching heart
to know that God’s Love
for her is unchanging and
unchangeable, and, that
true human love can only
begin and grow by touching
His Love.

Let your gentle Peace -
which this world cannot give
  • be always with her.
    And, help her to bring this
    same Peace into the lives
    of others.
Our Lady of Mental Peace,
  • Pray for us!
    Amen.
 
mouse333 said:
I just posted a “thank you” about my “God” voice and that it’s resolved and cleared up and persists sweetly.

However I am very alone.

I have worried at times that this voice was some sort of “imaginary friend” but it helps me so concretely, as I said in my “thank you”, that I have to believe that it somehow relates to the Divine.

However (is this a private revelation?) this morning He (?) was telling me that this was my purpose in the Kingdom of God, [an apostate Catholic psychotherapist asked me if I thought I even had any purpose in life] [and I didn’t even understand the question]:

well I guess I can’t say it here because maybe it is a private revelation. My God voice tells me lots of things but this was very profound.

A lot of it just entertains me and keeps my thoughts occupied and reassures me because I am so very alone. The condition I described in my “thank you” post, the painful glitches in my brain, which I have had for 25 years have made my life a hell to live, somehow I raised my son and stayed in a marriage but now that’s over, although my son is still nearby he is 21 and wants his freedom. My brain is destroyed by this condition and I have multiple physical issues as well, all of which make it impossible to form new relationships in my new area. I talk to people at the corner store (I perseverate over cigarettes when I have nothing to do, which is a lot of the time); otherwise I only have my mother and father. I feel that the Lord put my husband and I asunder because our marriage was somewhat illegitimate in the first place. But I miss him now more than anything and he won’t talk to me and I’m not interested, really, in forming new relationships. He was my whole world. I am so alone it is painful for others to see. They are kind to me at the pharmacy where I get my meds, including psych meds; but I just don’t seem to be able to form personal relationships any more, which makes me to scared to try to join a church. So I can’t even get my faith questions cleared up. I am frequently suicidal and continuously pray the Lord will take me.

I just feel all out. I have been alone a lot of my life but was always part of an institution. Now I am out in society alone and feel I have no place. My ex won’t talk to me, it was a thrill the one time he called me since last Christmas to say he would be coming here, but he didn’t, and although he has recently restored my on his phone (he had cut me off) he only takes messages and doesn’t respond except, sometimes, in my soul as he has a way of doing, but it is so uncertain.

Feel like I’m about to drop off the edge of the earth, wish I could.
Click to expand...
I’ve had times where I’d feel like I couldn´t live without a certain relationship, and I found out later that seemed to be because I was so codependent.

With codependent-type relationships, we may feel like we, literally, can´t survive without them, that without them, we’d want to even commit suicide.

If that´s part of what you are working with, there are also support groups, such as Codependent’s Anonymous (CA).

Some people become dependent on …substances…alcohol, cigarettes, drugs…or even food. This is one kind of codependent relationship. People can also become overly dependent on a person, where it can be a life-or-death type of relationship.

Now, this all sounds very romantic, but in real life, it can be HIGHLY problematic, especially when this love isn’t corresponded.

If there is any codependent component, boundaries is a key issue, not overstepping our boundaries with others, and defending our boundaries from others.

Codependency was a phenomenon originally discovered with children of alcoholics. They coined the term, originally, “co-alcoholic”. Then, they realized that this same type of phenomenon extended to people with disabilities, children from large families, and more.

These folks, for whatever reason(s) can develop…addictions to substances…and also people.

Now, if that is the case, the counselor would need to first realize you have codependency in order to focus on, and treat that. I went to counseling, and only it was this last time that a very astute counselor realized I was codependent, and I FINALLY was starting to get somewhere in treatment!

Though it may seem to you like it’s the end of the world that your ex isn´t talking to you, it´s actually not. If one has codependency, we can also tend to overreact to stimuli of almost any kind.

We believe, mistakenly, that this person is the one, and only, one who can help us. That´s also generally not true, either.

However, if it is codependency, this pattern of relating, being unable to form a relationship, is one symptom. If you find NONE of your relationships work, that could possibly be due to codependency, where, one never learned healthy boundaries or relationships. Every relationship from there on, is typically, a disaster.

HOWEVER, there’s always hope. They say what is learned can also be UNLEARNED, but it takes work.

One would also tend to feel REALLY lonely, as a result. I hope you will realize whether your ex talks to you, or not, you´re a valuable person.

I hope you will keep trying but with treatment for this. Good luck with whatever you decide.

God bless you!
 
Gracious and merciful Father, please come to their assistance.

Our Father, who art in Heaven, hallowed be thy name.
Thy kingdom come, thy will be done, on Earth as it is in Heaven.
Give us this day our daily bread,
and forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us.
And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil.
Amen.

Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with thee.
Blessed are thou among women, and blessed is the fruit of thy womb Jesus.
Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners, now and at the hour of our death.
Amen.

Glory Be to the Father, and to the Son, and to the Holy Spirit.
As it was in the beginning, is now, and ever shall be, world without end.
Amen.
 
St. Dymphna pray for us

St. Michael the archangel, defend us in battle,
be our protection against the snares and
wickedness of the devil. May God rebuke him,
we humbly pray, o prince of heavenly host, by
the power of God, cast into hell Satan and all
the evil spirits who prowl about the world
seeking the ruin of souls. Amen.
†
 
I’m praying! I have a friend who broke off a “living without benefit of the clergy” type marriage. And it took her two years AFTER the moving out to really come to terms with it. I said we have to form a 'Single Ladies Club" because as we are getting older, most of us will become “unmarried” as the lawyers in New Mexico call it.

And we have to troop along. It used to be the unmarried had their jobs to do: that was where we got all the church ladies to help. And they could help people like you and me. I know you got some really wild problems…😦

Plus, you have a son and he 's champing at the bit for his freedom, and that is a hard time for ANY parent. I don’t have that experience, but two of the other ladies in “The Club” do. Oh, just gotta keep praying.

I’m sorry you feel so lonely. Still hang onto the Lord, oh just hang on to Him, because he is magnificent !:gopray2: :go pray: :angel1: :heaven: :hug3:

I hope you have a peaceful night, and I’ll be praying for you.

:byzsoc:
 
Hail Mary, full of Grace, the Lord is with thee.
Blessed are thou among women and blessed is the fruit of thy womb, Jesus.
Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners now and at the hour of our death.
Amen.

Praying for you. :gopray:
 
Saint Michael, the archangel, defend us in battle, be our defense against the wickedness and snares of the devil, may God rebuke him, we humbly pray. And do you, O’ Prince of the Heavenly host, by the power of God thrust into Hell Satan and all the other evil spirits who prowl about the world for the ruin of souls.

Amen.

†

Our Father who art in Heaven, hallowed be thy name.

Thy kingdom come, thy will be done on Earth as it is in Heaven.

Give us this day our daily bread.

And forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us.

And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil.

Amen.

†

Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with thee.

Blessed are you among women, and blessed is the fruit of your womb Jesus.

Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners, now and at the hour of our death.

Amen.

†

Prayer to Our Lady of Mental Peace

O Lady of Mental Peace,
Mother of Tranquility
and Mother of Hope,
look upon mouse333 in this time
of weakness and unrest.

Teach her searching heart
to know that God’s Love
for her is unchanging and
unchangeable, and, that
true human love can only
begin and grow by touching
His Love.

Let your gentle Peace -
which this world cannot give
  • be always with her.
    And, help her to bring this
    same Peace into the lives
    of others.
Our Lady of Mental Peace,
  • Pray for us!
    Amen.
 
Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with thee.
Blessed art thou among women and blessed is the fruit of thy womb, Jesus.
Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners, now, and at the hour of our death.
Amen.

St. Dymphna, we ask you to intercede for mouse333 that she may recover her peace of mind and joy of living.
 
Glory be to the Father and to the Son and to the Holy Spirit, as it was in the beginning, is now and ever shall be, world without end. Amen.​
​

:highprayer:
 
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