Spiritual direction with no director

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LISA_Annette

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I used to have a spiritual director some twenty years ago when I was first committing myself to God and the Catholic church. I have not had spiritual direction in 15 yrs. I make my monthly confessions and try to be as involved in my church as time permits with a family and a new baby.

In short, I pray daily—and am interested in Carmelite spirituality. I feel like a rat on a milk carton in the middle of the ocean though. I have tried several times to find a suitable director, but they either have no time to give at least once every three months (I understand some priests are a bit wary because some folks are very needy, and end up taking too much of their time), or they just don’t think it is important to offer advice to me, like:“who do you think you are wanting this direction??”

I just need some reassurance. Is there any way to get through the “beginning” without spiritual direction??? I have been beginning for twenty plus years, and am basically going to resign myself to think I am spiritual retarded. I hate to see what I am writing — it sounds whiney.😦
 
I don’t have one yet, and I should pray hard to have one. In the mean time, I read posts on CAF, attend Bible class. More importantly, I read books about canonized saints, especially St. Faustina and St. Francis. St. Faustina’s diary has a great impact on my spiritual journey - it seems that every subject I brought up in my mind, within the same week, her diary mentions about it.

“My daughter, be diligent in writing down every sentence I tell you concerning My mercy, because this is meant for a great number of souls who will profit from it” (Diary 1142)
 
water said:
I don’t have one yet, and I should pray hard to have one. In the mean time, I read posts on CAF, attend Bible class. More importantly, I read books about canonized saints, especially St. Faustina and St. Francis. St. Faustina’s diary has a great impact on my spiritual journey - it seems that every subject I brought up in my mind, within the same week, her diary mentions about it.

“My daughter, be diligent in writing down every sentence I tell you concerning My mercy, because this is meant for a great number of souls who will profit from it” (Diary 1142)
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I will pray specifically too to find one, then. Hope you find one. I think I will read St Faustina’s Diary too…that is a powerful passage that you quoted. Thanks:) 🙂
 
LISA_Annette said:
I used to have a spiritual director some twenty years ago when I was first committing myself to God and the Catholic church. I have not had spiritual direction in 15 yrs. I make my monthly confessions and try to be as involved in my church as time permits with a family and a new baby.

In short, I pray daily—and am interested in Carmelite spirituality. I feel like a rat on a milk carton in the middle of the ocean though. I have tried several times to find a suitable director, but they either have no time to give at least once every three months (I understand some priests are a bit wary because some folks are very needy, and end up taking too much of their time), or they just don’t think it is important to offer advice to me, like:“who do you think you are wanting this direction??”

I just need some reassurance. Is there any way to get through the “beginning” without spiritual direction??? I have been beginning for twenty plus years, and am basically going to resign myself to think I am spiritual retarded. I hate to see what I am writing — it sounds whiney.😦
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There is nothing whiney about your post.

Lisa, why do you think you are a spiritual retard? What makes you think you are at the beginning for twenty years? I hope you don’t mind me asking you this but it seems very important to me to ask you those questions. If you want to answer those questions you can pm me if that would be better.

You have clearly discerned many things and it always strikes me in your posts that you have a strong spiritual leaning to the Carmelite spirituality. Have you ever felt called to seek spiritual direction from a Carmelite brother or sister?

In the Living Prayer of my life
 
If you like Carmelite spirituality, have you checked the monastaries? I know that there is a “house” of Carmelites in Dallas and one of them mentioned his former monastary in San Antonio. I’m not sure where you are exactly, but maybe you are close enough to one to make the drive every 2-3 months or so? I know some people whose spiritual directors initially met with them in person and then they have kept it up by phone.
 
jc-servant said:
If you like Carmelite spirituality, have you checked the monastaries? I know that there is a “house” of Carmelites in Dallas and one of them mentioned his former monastary in San Antonio. I’m not sure where you are exactly, but maybe you are close enough to one to make the drive every 2-3 months or so? I know some people whose spiritual directors initially met with them in person and then they have kept it up by phone.
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We visit San Antonio often.
We always make Sunday mass at the The Little Flower Basilica every time we go to S.A., nomatter what part of town we are staying at. The Carmelite Monastery is right behind the Basilica. I am waiting for the phone call of a Lay Carmelite lady by May or June, because I had just missed the August interviews, as I called them too late.

I had a spiritual director who was a brother there for about 3 months 10 yrs ago (I saw him maybe twice)—but it did not work out. He got too ill to keep it up, and that is fine.
maybe if I hold out until August, and stop whining like a ninny:p, everything will work out. “Methinks”😃 the post-partum hormones are still getting into balance here, so it makes me feel more anxiety at times than I should :hypno: 😃

Thanks for your suggestion about long-distance spiritual direction, and thanks to the other people who responded to this thread.🙂
 
LISA_Annette said:
We visit San Antonio often.
We always make Sunday mass at the The Little Flower Basilica every time we go to S.A., nomatter what part of town we are staying at. The Carmelite Monastery is right behind the Basilica. I am waiting for the phone call of a Lay Carmelite lady by May or June, because I had just missed the August interviews, as I called them too late.

Thanks for your suggestion about long-distance spiritual direction, and thanks to the other people who responded to this thread.🙂
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You go for it Lisa and don’t let anything deter you! You have my prayers.

I have spiritual direction over the telephone or by letter long distance and only manage once a year to see my spiritual director. It works for me.

In the Living Prayer of my life
 
LISA_Annette said:
“Methinks”😃 the post-partum hormones are still getting into balance here,
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Congratulations on your baby and God greatly bless the little one and all little ones.

For your little one:

(Please Note: This uploaded content is no longer available.)

Hail Holy Queen,
Mother of mercy,
Hail our life, our sweetness and our hope,
to you do we cry poor banished children of Eve,
to you do we send up our sighs,
mourning and weeping in this valley of tears.
Turn then most gracious advocate
thine eyes of mercy towards us
and after this our exile
show unto us the blessed fruit of thy womb Jesus.
O Clement, O Loving, O Sweet Virgin Mary,
Pray for us O Holy Mother of God,
that we may be made worthy of the promises of Christ.
Amen.
 
May God’s peace, love and mercy be with you all!

Continue to pray. Ask Our Blessed Mother to give you one and surely you won’t be disappointed! That’s what happened to me. She gave me one and the rest is an awesome journey together of drawing closer to Our Beloved Lord Jesus Christ. I couldn’t have asked for a better one. Hand picked and formed by Our Blessed Mother herself.

It is so humbling to be given such a great grace by Our Good Lord Jesus. I guess the greatest sinner needed to be paired with/ spiritually directed by a holy priest, to keep following the way of Christ no matter what so that I won’t go back to my evil and wicked ways. God surely has been merciful to me and to all and I am eternally grateful for that.

Blessed be Jesus and Mary!
 
That is such an AWESOME picture of Jesus with the child!! I am going to want to buy one----who painted it?? Good and Gentle Jesus!
 
4loveofJesus said:
May God’s peace, love and mercy be with you all!

Continue to pray. Ask Our Blessed Mother to give you one and surely you won’t be disappointed! That’s what happened to me. She gave me one and the rest is an awesome journey together of drawing closer to Our Beloved Lord Jesus Christ. I couldn’t have asked for a better one. Hand picked and formed by Our Blessed Mother herself.

It is so humbling to be given such a great grace by Our Good Lord Jesus. I guess the greatest sinner needed to be paired with/ spiritually directed by a holy priest, to keep following the way of Christ no matter what so that I won’t go back to my evil and wicked ways. God surely has been merciful to me and to all and I am eternally grateful for that.

Blessed be Jesus and Mary!
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I will pray for that specific intention in the next rosary I pray. And that is just wonderful that you have the spiritual direction you need—I am sure you will be with Our Lord forever, and that you will not digress from His ways!
AMEN!!😃
 
As you’re leaning to Carmelites this advice might be not of great help, but maybe to somebody else 😉

I was in the same situation, I didn’t really know where to look for a director although I had several possibilities (Jesuits at my university, list of directors kept by the diocesis), but somehow… no director for me. I read here on the forums that somebody just mailed Opus Dei via their website, so I tried the same, had the first meeting last thursday and I am very hopeful that this will turn out great 👍 (But as I am looking for guidance along a traditional “life plan”, a director from Opus Dei is in some ways made for me).
 
Cran said:
As you’re leaning to Carmelites this advice might be not of great help, but maybe to somebody else 😉

I was in the same situation, I didn’t really know where to look for a director although I had several possibilities (Jesuits at my university, list of directors kept by the diocesis), but somehow… no director for me. I read here on the forums that somebody just mailed Opus Dei via their website, so I tried the same, had the first meeting last thursday and I am very hopeful that this will turn out great 👍 (But as I am looking for guidance along a traditional “life plan”, a director from Opus Dei is in some ways made for me).
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Well this sounds good! I hope someone else whom this might help is reading this:) ----If not for the Carmelite leaning in my life, this might be good for me too—I will likely wait for the Carmelites to call me in May, and see what happens from there. But the Opus Dei suggestion is good too. Thank you:)
 
quiet52 said:
How did you find your spiritual director?
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My first spiritual director was a Priest, due to circumstances in that Priests life that spiritual direction came to an end which saddened me no end as he was good and kind to me. I prayed no end for another Spiritual Director and I was very sad and my heart was very heavy. Prior to this I had been aspiring to Carmel. Another Priest who I love, told me to ask the Sister in charge of my formation to be my spiritual director. In all obedience I asked her to be my spiritual director and she has been an excellent and faithful spiritual director to me ever since. She does not spare me and harshly corrects me, she guides me and keeps me safe and has led me down deep and challenging paths only to my benefit.

So I thank God for that great blessing He has given to me.🙂

If you feel drawn to be guided by a spiritual director then pray for one and ask learned people for help to find one for you.

In the Living Prayer of my life
 
My first spiritual director was the group counselor of Christian Life Community in college, a holy priest with the gift of healing. Fr. Richard helped me tremendously in my spiritual growth. His direction laid very solid foundation to my faith from my young age.

I love Father Richard dearly. He passed away in 1999, I flew back to Taiwan to attend his funeral. There were 40 priests assisted his funeral Mass, several thousands people at the bury ground.

I did not have any spiritual director ever since I graduated from college and came to States. For many years, I rely on my own spiritual readings and the guidance of the Holy Spirit.

In spring of 2006, I strongly felt the need of a spiritual director. I had no idea how to find one. I prayed and prayed. The Holy Spirit led me to my current one who is the pastor of my parish of two thousand families. Knowing his busy schedule, his promise of directing me is a total unexpected grace. I clearly know it is God who guided me to my current spiritual director. And I pay attention to what he said to me with total humility and obedience.

Pray for a spiritual director and God will direct your step.
 
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