Spiritually frustrated

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David_Vestal

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All,

You may remember me from 6 months ago, well its been almost a year since I was installed in my new parish as their EOMHC, the lady who was supposed to help me get scheduled to serve never returned my calls, emails, well I was having enough difficulty and that pushed me away even further I have not been to Church for 6 months now, I feel myself wanting to goto confession but the situation I am in and the sin keep me from living the Church life like I so adamantly used to be on fire for as a convert, any advice? Also I don’t have any Catholics friends or people to evangelize or do apologetics which was the other thing I really enjoyed.
 
David, whose name means “Beloved” I ask God to help you to return to Him whose beloved you are! I ask God to help you move past the ‘sin’ that keeps you from Confession that you obviously need for peace of mind and soul, and in order to move forward in the Faith you embraced so joyfully.

David, is there a Catholic library anywhere near you… and are you able to come again to the Forums for inspiration?

I will keep you in prayer, my brother, whom I hope someday to meet in heaven! All the blessings of the Holy Spirit! Trishie 🙂
 
David_Vestal said:
All,

You may remember me from 6 months ago, well its been almost a year since I was installed in my new parish as their EOMHC, the lady who was supposed to help me get scheduled to serve never returned my calls, emails, well I was having enough difficulty and that pushed me away even further I have not been to Church for 6 months now, I feel myself wanting to goto confession but the situation I am in and the sin keep me from living the Church life like I so adamantly used to be on fire for as a convert, any advice? Also I don’t have any Catholics friends or people to evangelize or do apologetics which was the other thing I really enjoyed.
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Why dont’ you do apologetics here? It’s what we’re here for.

And I don’t get why not serving as an EMHC would drive you to not go to Mass - there are plenty of people who aren’t EMsHC who go to Mass, y’know. It’s not an option not to, Jesus commanded it and it hurts Him when you don’t go.

Why not just resolve to go to Confession (today) and go to Mass tonight - most churches will have confession just before their vigil Mass.
 
Do go to confession. This is step # 1 and start going to mass. If you have a perpetual adoration chapel at your church, go and just kneel/sit before the Blessed Sacrament, in the presence of the crucified and resurrected Jesus and just let his presence fill you. Look at him and silently pour out your heart to him. He is loving and he is forgiving and will be there for you. You will remain in my prayers. Keep me in yours.
Prayers & blessings
Deacon Ed B
 
David_Vestal said:
All,

months now, I feel myself wanting to goto confession but the situation I am in and the sin keep me from living the Church life like I so adamantly used to be on fire for as a convert, any advice? Also I don’t have any Catholics friends or people to evangelize or do apologetics which was the other thing I really enjoyed.
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you ask for advice so I am giving it. your situation has absolutely nothing to do with the fact that you have not been called to render the service for which you so generously volunteered. It has to do with the fact that you are using this as an excuse to stay away from Mass and the sacraments. Our union with Christ comes from Christ, not from any individual, whether priest or other parish staff member or lay volunteer.

Only we can break that unity by our own acts and decisions.

your instincts to return to confession are 100% sound, so follow it.

Go to confession today and Mass this evening or tomorrow morning. receive communion, from the priest, deacon or other commissioned layperson, with gratitude and humility.

now after communion, look around you. see 300-100 other Catholics who did not take any active role in service of the liturgy on the altar or at communion time. They are participating just as you are, as the congregation, the Body of Christ, listening, responding, in dialogue with the priest, offering their gifts and themselves and receiving Christ in communion, or in spiritual communion if they cannot receive. They are not somehow “less” involved than those doing a specific service.

Show up in your own life, do not let anyone else put you on the sidelines. \

Oh and welcome home, the person you see grinning from ear to ear when you come to Mass this weekend will be me.

You used to be on fire for Christ because you stayed in contact with the Living Flame. You are not on fire now because you walked away from the source of the fire. Come on, now, we are waiting for you.
 
Find your anchor, spiritually, and accept the fact we all sin. If you can’t find fellowship at your current church, go to another one. Keep trying, have faith, and remember: all believers sin; God loves us anyway. As long as we sincerely fight the temptation to sin, and repent, God will continue to give us His grace. 🙂
 
quote: David Vestal
…the situation I am in and the sin keep me from living the Church life…any advice?
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It’s a gift, I think, that you see matters so clearly.

Many times, I think, a person already knows the outline of the
advice that they would give to another, in a similar situation.

Sometimes, it is most difficult to accept even our own advice.
[Advice = *mihi visum est = “*it seems to me…”]

I liken this to the situation of a toddler, who needs to put down
his teddy bear, to hold the ice cream cone with both hands.
He wants to be able to do both. Which is most human of him.
The trouble is, either the ice cream lands on the rug, or he
does without either his bear or the ice cream. It is, in life, his choice.
Sometimes, in life, it does comes down to either/or.
Part of the delimna of the human condition.

The delimna is seen much more clearly, in the simple choice confronting a toddler.
It’s much much harder, in adulthood, to choose between two valued realities.
I ask God to help you, as you work this through.

Kindest regards,

reen12
 
All,

Thanks for the massive response, I understand what you are saying that the people attending are no less in participation then say the EMHC but it is something that I loved to do and it gave me that extra spiritual boost and flood in my soul, its as close to a priest as I can be and as close to feeding His’ flock as I can come, and to not be able to do that really REALLY bums me out, I am a truck driver I work 14 hr shifts a night I will ask my dispatcher if I can start later this coming Sat so I can goto confession because they only have it on Saturday.

My God My Father Hear my cry
My life is nothing without You
Pour out your sacred blood and mercy over my soul
Infuse me with Your love and call me back to Your Church
And to your sacred body and blood in the Eucharist
My God my Father Hear my cry
My soul shakes and battles
MY own skin wages war against me
Lift me up and set me above others
Slay the demons and put them to rest
Its Your love I need like the air I breathe
My God my Father Hear my cry
Dont let your son fall to the wayside
 
David_Vestal said:
All,

I understand what you are saying that the people attending are no less in participation then say the EMHC but it is something that I loved to do and it gave me that extra spiritual boost and flood in my soul, its as close to a priest as I can be and as close to feeding His’ flock as I can come, and to not be able to do that really REALLY bums me out, I am a truck driver I work 14 hr shifts a night I will ask my dispatcher if I can start later this coming Sat so I can goto confession because they only have it on Saturday.
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If you really want to serve, you have to keep on pushing your intention. I am sorry to say that it is common that somebody drops the ball somewhere. My parish is a very active one. A member of my SCC group signed up for being the lector. Nobody ever called her until she said something to the priest. Then she was scheduled twice for reading the Scripture on Sunday. Later on her name got dropped again. I brought this issue up for her during the Pastoral Council meeting, some other Council member promised to talk to the person in charge, but still she has not been scheduled… Especially for a large parish, there are many people volunteering, things like this happen.

So, if you really want to serve in certain area, keep on knocking, and seeking until you get it.

But first thing first, like others recommended, get yourself right with God first. And please keep in mind, your relationship is simply between you and God, there should be no excuse to drift away, no matter who or what disappointed you.

By the way, since you drive on the road a lot, you have all the time to pray and listen to worship songs, to sing and to talk to Him. What a privilege you have!

God bless!
 
Don’t just wait for confession at the scheduled times. Seek out a priest and ask him to hear your confession. I know of none that would refuse you.
Prayers & blessings
Deacon Ed B
 
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