Stay at home moms with kids age 17+

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Lucy_1

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If you have always been a stay-at-home mom and you have kids 17-22, how do you order your day? How do you spend your time? What do you now consider your duties of state? What’s your daily routine like? What are your priorities?
 
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It takes some getting used to, not having kids “need” you the way they used to.

For myself, I realized that I finally had a schedule that allowed me to attend daily mass! ( I know that is not probably an option right now, but just throwing it out there. 😉)

Perhaps if you think about it, there has been something you used to do before you had kids that you gave up or didn’t have much time for. Now you might have time to return to an old hobby or interest.

I still do the same things I used to do at home. The house just stays a bit neater, and I am not cooking for as many people. ( That freed me up to try new recipes! 😊)

It’s a bit of a learning curve. Be kind to yourself about any feelings you might be having.
 
If you need to return to work, now is the time to get organized so you will have recent entries on your resume by doing volunteer work or something in line with where you would like to end up.
 
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I don’t have any direct experience with this, but I imagine you have to find something to do outside the home. You can only clean the house so much.

Part time job? Volunteering?
 
I would consider offering tutoring and/or childcare services this fall!
 
It’s not just that I’m looking to fill my time. I’m interested in the principles, priorities, and practicalities of a well-ordered life which is pleasing to God.
 
Lucy_1 said:
It’s not just that I’m looking to fill my time. I’m interested in the principles, priorities, and practicalities of a well-ordered life which is pleasing to God.
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If you don’t need the extra income of a paid job, why not volunteer at a charity/non-profit? Maybe something like St Vincent de Paul?

Maybe your parish knows of people who could some help. My parish had organized volunteers willing to go to the store for elderly/high-risk people during COVID.
 
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Yes, I actually work with them already. There’s are lots of good things to do. What I’m mainly interested in is what should my day look like as far as work, leisure and prayer? What are my duties of state now that my kids are grown? How do I decide what my priorities should be? How do I discern what direction the last third of my life should take?
 
I don’t know what “duties of state” refers to, but I think the key in all things is balance. You don’t want to fill your day so completely that you have no time to relax, but you also don’t want to spend hours and hours just watching tv.

If I were in your shoes and money wasn’t an issue, I’d make sure you fit in time each day for prayer, exercise, and the daily chores. Once you’ve done that, you can consider volunteering a few hours a few times a week.
 
Well, you could help a lot of people out right now by offering tutoring services. I would think that would please God a lot. Granted, it probably isn’t a long-term lifestyle, but its a thing that is desperately needed right now.
 
Lucy_1 said:
It’s not just that I’m looking to fill my time. I’m interested in the principles, priorities, and practicalities of a well-ordered life which is pleasing to God.
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How can we possibly advise you about a well-ordered life? This is up to God, not us. It’s possible that God wants you to spend hours each day reading your Bible and other helpful writings and praying! Or He may want you to spend hours each day in volunteer activities. Or maybe He wants you to learn how to play the organ so you can play at Mass! Or maybe He wants you to begin training for a marathon, or take up ice skating, or re-paint your home, or be diagnosed with a debilitating disease (I hope not!)…

Spend time with God and ask HIM, not us! 🤔 That’s how to have a well-ordered life–stay close to God and walk and talk with Him throughout the day.

Then just live your life and trust that HE will guide you into activities that He wants you to do, and guide you AWAY from activities that He doesn’t want you to do (at this time, anyway).

Ask Him specifically to send people into your life who will ask you to do what God wants you to do; e.g., your priest asks if you would be willing to chair the parish Christmas Angel Tree outreach. And ask Him to give you peace about how you are spending your time.

Good for you for wanting to please God! I know you will accomplish much for His Kingdom in the coming months and years.
 
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Yes, I realize no one can tell me. That is not what I was asking. I was asking for other women to share what their lives and priorities are like so that I might have a broader vision.
 
I did as others have suggested, and volunteered with two service groups at my parish. There never was time before, and I was enjoying it…until Covid came along. 🙁

I know that your children are all still home, but you will find that you will have more free time and less of a structured schedule I think.
 
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