Struggling to admit and let go

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Struggling93

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Non-practicing catholic daughter partially left the church because of boyfriend, devastating to me but i swallowed it ☹️ though I’m still reminding her of the authority of the church and the teachings but being carefully mindful not to be nagging about it; now - she wants to visit boyfriend (2 hrs. away) and possibly spending the night with a girlfriend from the evangelical church she’s now attending nearby her boyfriends. I’m saying no - am i harsh? too old fashioned? or just unreasonable? I trust my daughter but… I guess no buts, huh? Any advice? Please… Thank you.
 
A helpful point of reference would be your daughters age. There’s a big difference between a twelve year old and an eighteen year old.

If she’s an adult, there’s not much you can do to stop her. If she’s still a child, then she should honor your wishes. Last I checked, the Evangelicals still believed in the Ten Commandments.

I know that I wouldn’t want my son going far away to stay with a girlfriend, probably even less so a daughter going to stay near a boyfriend.

There’s nothing wrong with old-fashioned. Modern-fashioned thinking leads many to damnation.
 
Is she an atheist, or a Christian of another church now?
How old is she?
Do you trust she’s telling the truth about staying with a female evangelical friend? Like have you caught her in a lie before? Evangelicals are pretty strict about no sex before marriage, so chastity-wise, prolly not a problem.
But it still hurts to have your child reject the way you brought her up.
 
Pray for her. Make sure you don’t push her away.
Did she leave the church because of a guy?

Then maybe her conversion into evangelical (if that is the case) is not based on intellect but possibly pressure from the guy and possibly others.

Are you good with apologetics?
You can ask her when you feel the time is right questions such as -

1.How did we get the bible canon? Where in the bible does it say which books belong in the bible?
2.In John chapter 6 was Jesus being literal or not concerning eating his flesh.
3. When did the evangelical church start? Was it recent? If so why did God wait so long to start it? Was there a correct church to join on earth before the evangelical Church started?

You can recommend her watching the Journey home and ask her opinion on it.
 
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So sorry to hear this,I know how it hurts .
As she is that age just keep loving her through it all, and as another poster said make sure nothing pushes her away.You keep the communication lines just as open ,affection gentleness as I’m sure ,by the sound of your care you do.
God bless :pray:t2:
 
Thank you for your response… letting go of her or any of our children will always be hard…
 
She’s 23 years old and you forbid her to go visit her boyfriend and another friend? Yes, you are too harsh and yes, this is completely unreasonable.

I understand that it must be upsetting that she has left the church. But she is an adult and should be treated like one. Especially if you want a good relationship with her.
 
All the kids in my family have left the catholic church in one way or another, even though my mom and dad are old school orthodox catholics. The kids (myself included) have gone back, left again, gone back, etc.

It must be super hard for the parents and I feel for you though sometimes you just need to put religion on the shelf and pray for your kids. Talking about it a lot and pressuring them almost always doesn’t work.
 
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