happyrubberband:
In doing this, I realize that I must attempt to be submissive to my husband, knowing that he will love me completely. This is so difficult! I’ve developed my own way of doing things, I’m controlling, I feel that my way is better in most circumstances…and to just stand by, and bite my lip while I’m trying to trust my husband’s judgement is the hardest think about marriage so far.
Hold on Honey! When we were made to be submissive, it was not to be a doormat. Your husband is to be submissive too! This means you work together, realize each other’s strengths, and find the common ground. Since you admit to be controlling, it is probably difficult to “let go”. However, this is awesome that you are given this challenge with in your marriage. Something so many have trouble with is “letting go and trusting God!” Since you love your husband, your love is the reason you back off and listen to him and you work together. This is like a first step to how to deal with your control issues in other areas.
I actually was going through a really difficult time a few years ago. My marriage and family were all suffering. I was in church praying when I finally said “Ok God you take it (my life and control of it) because I seem to be messing it up!” At that moment I CHOSE to let God lead me to what I need to do. I became mush more open to his love and direction. I must say my life, marriage and family are very strong today. I had a church member ask me how I did it, I told her it is not me, but God! I blindly follow my shepard for he knows the way. I use to be so worried about the details, but now I see the bigger picture. I see that God needs me to help carry out a greater purpose of which I cannot fathom. In just a few short years, I have seen how my life has changed and how my actions have lead to bigger things. I have a peace I have not had since I was a child and did not care about such things. I trust God has the plan, and it will all work out. This letting go is so uplifting. Yes, when I have a deadline I do get a little stressed, but not about the little stuff anymore. It is all about trust and a realization that there is something bigger out there.
I worry a lot about my MIL. I do not think she has had a moment of pease in her life. She is always thinking about what is next and how she can make it all happen her way. She does not trust anyone to do anything or to do it right. She is very uptight. She also has little faith in God because she can not let go and trust him to do or lead her to what is best for her.
I am not saying you are that controlling, but you should be aware of the sin associated to it. Once you can understand the sin, you can proceed to let go. I think the biggest thing is assuming that you can do it better. I heard a country song while on a long drive “If you want to hear God laugh, tell him what your plans are!” How can we be able to comprehend what is best if we can not see the whole picture?
So think of your submission a call from God to do what is best for everyone and not just yourself. You have a wonderful husband, show him how much you love him. Pray and pray often!
My hubby was not Catholic either, but when he discovered the truth, he made the choice. Let the HS work within him, do not pressure him on Catholicism.
I hope this helps!
Seriously though, Della is correct that you need to use “techniques” that work for you, your husband and your situation. I just hate it when my wife wants to tell me that I’m watching too much ESPN that she puts a block on the channel.