Suicide and teenagers

[Jennifer_J]

Could someone explain to me how an 18 year old with everything going for them, could take their own life? I’m beside myself as a friend of our family’s daughter was found dead today…she was popular, involved in sports, had a nice family, good grades…I just don’t get it. I know the situation is still being investigated so foul play hasn’t been ruled out, but I’m just so sad for this family. Please pray for them.

Jennifer

 

[MonicaPA]

That is a tragedy for sure. Many times this age group is most vulnerable due to alcohol, drugs, &/or clinical depression.

They do not see any other option as an escape from their misery & do not comprehend that their problems are only temporary. It is always VERY important to be a rock of stability & support for teens/pre-teens. Especially doing everything possible to have them know & love God is key. The teen years are a tough time in life & many have a hard time seeing past the here & now. I had a stable childhood & adolescence but there were MANY opportunities for me to get involved in some things that could have ruined my life. Thank God for stable, loving parents.

I don’t know your friend’s situation & I am not saying that they were at fault by any means. She could have been clinically depressed & doing drugs…teens are amazing at hiding things! That’s why parents have to always have their eyes & ears wide open & keep getting IN their business whether they like it or not.

God Bless her soul.

Monica

 

[puzzleannie]

In my daughter’s HS class there were 5 suicides, and two-murder suicides, and 4 killed in fatal car crashes after end-of-school functions–and this was a small school. One murder-suicide was a love affair gone wrong, the young man reacted when the lady broke up with him. The other was drug-related. of the 5 other suicides, one was “accidental” and occurred while the young man was engaged in a risky solitary sex act. One was a young man who had been hospitalized for depression after years of mental problems, and shot himself the day after his release. One was a youth who had no apparent personal problems, but did have a very troubled home life. But the other two were both young ladies who were extremely popular socially and successful academically. Both left evidence that they felt great pressure and stress to achieve in all areas of their life and were reacting to a fear of failure.

 

[betra2000]

Oh the tragedy. I will keep you and your friend in my prayers.

I remember when I was a teenager, how I thought that my problems were so tragic. I just felt that everything bad that happened was the end of my world. I did not see a future, this is why I took a bottle of pills. I have never spoken of this to anyone. I was always ashamed. But I do know that when I did it, I did not see the bigger picture. I did not see tomorrow. I just knew that my problems were so big to me that I did not want to live anymore.

Of course this was 20 years ago. I am a different person now and am glad that I lived to tell my story. I know that I do have a child who is so depressed and I remind her everyday what life could be, and how that her problems will get better. It is hard, but I do not want them to try that.

Again, I am praying for you and her family.

 

[mjdonnelly]

Being depressed is all relative. You can’t reason it out with logic. The brain can do some really strange things. I’ve seen a couple suicide attempts and have known several people who have tried it.

Talking with kids early on is about the best way to avoid it along with lots of support. Make sure priorities are straight, not getting an A in a class or even failing one is not the end of the world.

 

[Shlemele]

This is a tough one, brings up a lot of bad memories. Sometimes it doesn’t take anything at all to trigger thoughts that can lead to a suicide attempt. Some teens are prone to profound feelings of solitude and depression while others who might be going through a lot more emotionally are more resilient. I personally looking back recognize that I had a lot going for me my senior year of high school but none the less i felt like a failure and tried once to end my life (though not too successfully due to a friend walking in on me, I can thank God for that I know). Depression is a tough thing to battle and not everyone wears their scars on the outside. I know I didn’t have a lot of the typical symptoms and didn’t give off the signs of giving thing away and making plans ect. Heck I didn’t really even plan all that well, had I known my surroundings a bit better I probably wouldn’t be typing now. The thing is though I was headed off to college, dating a pretty girl, and pretty popular. Things were going well for me but I couldn’t shake feelings of self destruction. I had migraines at the time and some of the medication I was on did a real number on me (I have since stopped taking it) so that didn’t help.

I don’t know what the situation is but every one of us has our breaking point. The teen years seem to set this bar lower while our hormones and bodies are in limbo between childhood and adulthood. During this time PLEASE don’t take any talk about suicide or ending things lightly. Looking back I did give off some signals that would have been considered joking by some ( I have a rather dark sense of humor sometimes). The reality is that sometimes we will never know. As a side note women rarely use anything but pills for suicide, while men most often use guns. Keep this in mind if you have a teen who might be going through a dark time. Lock up all medications and guns, or better yet get rid of them altogether.

I will pray for the family

 

[Melanie01]

What a tragedy, I will pray for them and the family.

Such things have touched my family and I have known a number of youngsters also who have ended their lives. It is too painful to talk about the other posts have said it all anyway.

God Bless You and Yours

 

[theresa]

People deal with things and keep them hidden really well. Young people are so good at hiding things. They don’t know who to turn to for help, even with loving family and friends all around them. My daughter lost a friend last spring to suicide. It is so difficult to express how sad this is. It leaves a sick feeling in the pit of my stomach to think about it even now. I just pray and pray for everyone affected by this young lady’s death and for the peaceful rest of her soul.

 

[vluvski]

I lost a friend several months ago to suicide. This guy was a genius- graduated with high honors from my university on a scholarship that paid tuition as well as room and board and additional perks. He was Catholic, and we used to go to Mass together on campus. He was also a very generous person, always taking interest in everyone else’s joys and sorrows, and really finding opportunities to serve other people. He and some friends started an after school program on their own. He was the one everyone loved and looked up to… and then he took his own life. It rattled even the heartiest of people, including our scholarship director and many of the other students and administrators of the program.
I don’t understand what drives a person to do such a thing, but it can happen to anyone, regardless of how much they have going for them and how many friends they have. I took a lot of comfort writing a letter to his parents about all the wonderful memories he left, and basically didn’t acknowledge the circumstances surrounding his death. I think it is nice to remember him for who he was, and not how he ended his life.
I have lost three acquaintances/friends to suicide. I still hold onto hope that there is mercy and forgiveness after death for people who become so desperate.