Temporary Marriage Separation...please pray!!!

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Convert_in_99

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My husband and I are having lots of problems. We argue and fight instead of talk. He is very verbally aggressive and angry type person. Thankfully no physical abuse, sometimes verbal though. I am not perfect though either, as I have serious mental health issues myself, OCD, anxiety and depression.

Long story short, after taking advice from my own private counselor, I am going to go home (we live out of state) to stay with family a few weeks and see if things calm down some. My husband said no to counseling, but after I said I was leaving for a while he said he’d consider it now. So please pray for us…we NEED counseling for this to ever work out. Bless you all. Marriage is SO VERY hard!
 
In the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit

Eternal Father, we thank you for the crosses that we bear because we know that each one is an opportunity to grow closer to you. Lord we ask for your help and healing and that you bless our brother and sister with the gifts and fruits of your Holy Spirit and that you shine upon them with your love and peace, endurance and patience, wisdom and discernment, faith and hope and that you grant all the graces necessary to carry their crosses and bring glory to your name.

In the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit

Amen

Dearest sister,

May God shine upon you, our Lord Jesus Christ forgive all your sins, the Holy Spirit guide you, all the Saints pray for you and all the Angels protect you.
 
Marriage is SO VERY hard!
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You sure got that right…we can often wonder about what God was thinking…knowing how broken we are and can be in this “valley of tears”…but he is the Divine Physician and can fix anything wrong in us/with us.

Over the years…I have simply prayed and asked God to make our marriage what he wants it to be…from …“A-to Z” …in all aspects…the spiritual, the corporal, and the temporal dimensions…especially what He wants from me in our marriage. My wife taught me that God wants as an unconditional cornerstone of the day-to-day life in marriage…the bedrock must always and in every circumstance be… “let Peace reign”! She taught me by example…even when I was a “knuckle headed” pride filled "horse’s “fanny”.

She stuck to her “guns”…Peace will reign…then we can fix/take care of anything else…but first there has to be peace reigning in our relationship. Know what…most of that other stuff disappeared…90+% of it was inconsequential…we learned to take care of the real issues/problems…the other 10%…while joking and kidding and teasing each other. Dumping that 90+%…was beyond words…Freedom to live and cherish each other…with all our admirable and even less than admirable qualities (most all of these rest on my side of the equation).

So…take to heart in the Divine Physician…pray that you and your husband submit wholly to His Divine diagnoses and prescription…and do exactly as He prescribes.

Pax Christi

Here is a great resource…for your consideration:
**Gregory and Lisa Popcak
**
For Better…Forever!: A Catholic Guide to Lifelong Marriage
Gregory Popcak, Author
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amazon.com/Better-Forever-Catholic-Lifelong-Marriage/dp/0879736887
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Here is the link to his website/business information…lots of free resources…they are on many Radio programs and offer many MP-3/Podcast resources. Also look for them in the EWTN archive resources.
**The Pastoral Solutions Institute **
exceptionalmarriages.com/index.htm
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Eternal God , in whom mercy is endless,
and the treasury of compassion inexhastible ,
look kindly upon us and increase Your mercy in us ,
that in difficult moments we might not despair
nor become despondent , but with great confidence ,
submit ourselves to Your Holy Will ,
which is love and mercy itself . Amen

Memorare (Prayer to Our Lady)
Remember, O most gracious Virgin Mary, that never was it known that anyone who fled to your protection, implored your help, or sought your intercession, was left unaided.
Inspired by this confidence, I fly unto you, O Virgin of virgins, my Mother. To you do I come, before you I stand, sinful and sorrowful. O Mother of the Word Incarnate, despise not my petitions, but in your mercy, hear and answer me. Amen
 
Lord, please grant this married couple the graces for docility, humility, and charity and temperance. Lead them to the virtues of joy also. Send angels to keep cool heads and assure that each member of this sacrament be concerned primarily with the well-being of the other. Lead them through this trial close to your Sacred Heart, on the way to the eternal banquet, now and forever. Our Lady, pray with us. Amen.
 
God did not intend marriage to be a vehicle for abuse: emotional, psychological or physical. I’m glad your husband is now willing to seek counseling. I suggest that your counselor be a Roman Catholic, if possible.

Removing yourself from an abusive situation is, in my opinion (having done it myself, and then having obtained an annulment from the Church), protecting yourself and is not contrary to the word of God. I pray that your marriage can come back together but I think this will take intensive therapy, both for his anger issues (which must be resolved) and your particular vulnerability due to anxiety and depression. Don’t give up, sister! Do your best and God will do the rest. It doesn’t always end up the way we want it to be but, if we follow God’s word and conduct ourselves with charity (especially with the guidance of a spiritual director), we do the best we can in a very difficult situation.
 
ellzeena said:
God did not intend marriage to be a vehicle for abuse: emotional, psychological or physical. I’m glad your husband is now willing to seek counseling. I suggest that your counselor be a Roman Catholic, if possible.

Removing yourself from an abusive situation is, in my opinion (having done it myself, and then having obtained an annulment from the Church), protecting yourself and is not contrary to the word of God. I pray that your marriage can come back together but I think this will take intensive therapy, both for his anger issues (which must be resolved) and your particular vulnerability due to anxiety and depression. Don’t give up, sister! Do your best and God will do the rest. It doesn’t always end up the way we want it to be but, if we follow God’s word and conduct ourselves with charity (especially with the guidance of a spiritual director), we do the best we can in a very difficult situation.
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My husband isn’t catholic. We were married in the church however. I know I am watching out for myself. I have a counselor and a spiritual director and they are helping me too. Thank you for your concern! : )
 
I just said a prayer for you and your husband. May charity and harmony prevail in your marriage. God bless you and keep you.
 
Hail Mary,
Full of Grace,
The Lord is with thee.
Blessed art thou among women,
and blessed is the fruit
of thy womb, Jesus.
Holy Mary,
Mother of God,
pray for us sinners now,
and at the hour of death.
Amen
 
Eternal God , in whom mercy is endless,
and the treasury of compassion inexhastible ,
look kindly upon us and increase Your mercy in us ,
that in difficult moments we might not despair
nor become despondent , but with great confidence ,
submit ourselves to Your Holy Will ,
which is love and mercy itself . Amen

Memorare (Prayer to Our Lady)
Remember, O most gracious Virgin Mary, that never was it known that anyone who fled to your protection, implored your help, or sought your intercession, was left unaided.
Inspired by this confidence, I fly unto you, O Virgin of virgins, my Mother. To you do I come, before you I stand, sinful and sorrowful. O Mother of the Word Incarnate, despise not my petitions, but in your mercy, hear and answer me. Amen
 
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