Here is the way to change that, when you have a decision to make, which one will demand the most struggle, dedication, sacrifice, commitment. etc etc.? That one is the right one. This is the method that My wife and I have followed over the past 30 years. Now in the twilight of my life I can rest knowing that I have accomplish every necessary important milestone in a life. I have not one single regret. Have I had failure, yep, If it was a moral failing I went to god and asked for forgiveness. If it was a financial failure I picked myself up dusted off and kept going in a better direction. The only failing the church should worry about is you moral failings. The rest is dealing with your maturity.