Thirteen Reasons Why on Netflix

[JackVk]

Anyone watch this series? I binged on it a couple weekscago. It’s about a teenage girl who commits suicide. Before that, she records tapes and sends them around her school to classmates, saying they were the reasons why she killed herself.

A lot of people are talking about it. Don’t go to the Facebook page; it’s a bunch of cringey posts gushing over how Hannah (the girl who offs herself) is such a martyr and a victim.

My opinion: Hannah comes off as vengeful and projects a decision she herself made on other people. Also, the show portrays the adults as naive, uncaring imbeciles who don’t understand. It sends the message of, “sorry, honey, you’re on your own. Your parents are too old to hear your problems, and your counselors are self-centered dolts.” Not what mentally-unstable teenagers suffering through high school angst need to hear.

 

[TheAmazingGrace]

Anyone watch this series? I binged on it a couple weekscago. It’s about a teenage girl who commits suicide. Before that, she records tapes and sends them around her school to classmates, saying they were the reasons why she killed herself.

A lot of people are talking about it. Don’t go to the Facebook page; it’s a bunch of cringey posts gushing over how Hannah (the girl who offs herself) is such a martyr and a victim.

My opinion: Hannah comes off as vengeful and projects a decision she herself made on other people. Also, the show portrays the adults as naive, uncaring imbeciles who don’t understand. It sends the message of, “sorry, honey, you’re on your own. Your parents are too old to hear your problems, and your counselors are self-centered dolts.” Not what mentally-unstable teenagers suffering through high school angst need to hear.

Personally, I can’t forgive the fact that they decided to show the suicide scene, which was incredibly graphic and went against the counsel of mental health professionals.

 

[Bruised_Reed]

I think it’s irresponsible to portray people who are suicidal using suicide for revenge. They only want their pain to stop.

Haven’t watched it. Not going to.

 

[z_0101]

I think it’s irresponsible to portray people who are suicidal using suicide for revenge. They only want their pain to stop.

Haven’t watched it. Not going to.

@Bruised Reed: Having been involved with a situation where a person committed suicide, to say that they “only want the pain to stop” is, to be very kind, in many cases very understated and very over simplified.

• As to the series, I don’t have access to it; however, based on the reviews, it is IMHO done in very poor taste - so many other topics upon which to have a show based.

 

[xNoOnex]

I don’t have a Netflix subscription right now, and even if I did I likely wouldn’t watch it since I’m not sure that I want to go back to a very dark point in my life but… Not to mention I heard mixed things about it in the first place.

. Also, the show portrays the adults as naive, uncaring imbeciles who don’t understand. It sends the message of, “sorry, honey, you’re on your own. Your parents are too old to hear your problems, and your counselors are self-centered dolts.” Not what mentally-unstable teenagers suffering through high school angst need to hear.

There’s a lot of times, when it comes to suicidal teens, adults sort of are useless. If I got a buck for the times I tried to talk to someone about the crippling depression I had in high school, and got told (especially by school counselors) that all I had to do was hang in there it and it would be alright… Well, I’d have enough for a Netflix subscription at least and that’s enough to make you feel like no one cares.

Likewise, talking to parents isn’t always an option. Especially if have a good relationship with them. At the time, my mother was the only person I could talk to and she had enough to worry about; my father was in a medically induced coma and the doctors didn’t think he’d make it and her brother was dying of cancer.

So I internalized it and after graduation, I almost chose to leave this world. I’m only hear today through the grace of God and a phone call.

Calling it “high school angst” comes off as someone who doesn’t really understand how depression works. It can hit you no matter how old you are and it can eat away at your will. While I’m not in as dark of place I was back then it’s something I still deal fifteen years later.

 

[Lea101]

Anyone watch this series? I binged on it a couple weekscago. It’s about a teenage girl who commits suicide. Before that, she records tapes and sends them around her school to classmates, saying they were the reasons why she killed herself.

A lot of people are talking about it. Don’t go to the Facebook page; it’s a bunch of cringey posts gushing over how Hannah (the girl who offs herself) is such a martyr and a victim.

My opinion: Hannah comes off as vengeful and projects a decision she herself made on other people. Also, the show portrays the adults as naive, uncaring imbeciles who don’t understand. It sends the message of, “sorry, honey, you’re on your own. Your parents are too old to hear your problems, and your counselors are self-centered dolts.” Not what mentally-unstable teenagers suffering through high school angst need to hear.

I watched it and shared my opinions here before.

This show isn’t made for suicidal people. Obviously watching a show about suicide isn’t a good idea in general.

As a…young person, I genuinely liked it. Obviously the main plot about a girl recording tapes is unrealistic, but it’s the means to show a suicidal girl’s POV. Remember, she recorded the tapes right after she was raped. She was in a terrible state of mind and if I’m not wrong, there was a moment where she said she sat there and listed out anyone that came to her mind at that point.

Her parents were portayed wonderfully, though. They were really sweet, it’s just that she was too scared to open up. There was also no way that they would notice anything that could be bothering her. In fact, there were also other adults that would actually love to help (her poetry class, her communications teacher) if she actually said something. Maybe it’s just what I picked up.

I watched the Beyond the Reasons special, though. If you haven’t, you should. Generally adults might not “get” teenagers. Some of her reasons…besides the sexual assault, rape and harassment seem quite “normal” for most adults. But teenagers will take it seriously. There are literally students who killed themselves because they get a B instead of an A. Their brains aren’t fully developed which makes them more impulsive and emotional. Add depression and bam. Disaster.

To say that she was being selfish and dramatic or that it’s just high school angst shows that you (not just you, but people in general) are part of the problem. It’s bigger than that for them. Why would anyone reach out if their struggles are going to be invalidated? I remember reading a post from a mom. She said that most teenagers she talked to related to the character, and most adults hated it. It’s kind of scary, coming from someone who relates to her as well.

What I got from her death was that it was a painful irony. So many people cared, even those in the tapes.

I’ve battled with suicidal thoughts and near suicide attempts, so honestly, I think the show was realistic in terms of how they show her thought process, especially as a teenager. Little things really get to you.

I would say that I wished there were more specific warnings about the graphic content besides a vague one at the beginning. Also wish they would have used Skye as a way to bring up the topic of mental health/suicide prevention more clearly. Maybe season 2?

 

[Lea101]

Personally, I can’t forgive the fact that they decided to show the suicide scene, which was incredibly graphic and went against the counsel of mental health professionals.

Surprisingly enough, the person/writer who pushed for that scene was someone who attempted suicide in his bathroom (the same way Hannah killed herself in the original story) . He remembered a really graphic description of a woman he knew who attempted suicide. He said he remembered it vividly and he immediately purged and got help. He said that people need to be very open about suicide.

I don’t agree with showing suicidal people graphic scenes though. He may be lucky that it helped, but it could simply trigger others. I didn’t mind the scene because I feel like it showed suicide is horrifying, not a decision a drama queen made because of some angst/for attention or whatever. However, this is an unpopular opinion and that’s fine.

 

[tee_eff_em]

DISCLAIMER: I’ve not seen it, but have been hearing a lot about it.

DISCLAIMER #2: Bullying, slut-shaming, sexual assault, and similar behaviors are deplorable, indefensible, and not to be tolerated.

BUT:

I am curious, what is the intersection of people-concerned-and-“woke”-about-teen-suicide and people-who-support-physician-assisted-suicide? To re-iterate: The circumstances which (I am told) drove the character’s choices are terrible. But once the girl has been broken by them, would assisted suicide advocates say we have any right to encourage her to go on living?

The cognitive dissonance of the western world continues apace. :sad_yes:

tee

 

[Indigo_Cardinal]

I binge-watched this, and my take on it…

I didn’t feel this glorified suicide, or necessarily made Hannah a martyr. I think all it did (and to echo a previous poster in regards to the tapes) was show what Hannah’s POV was that led her to make the decision she did.

And I think the show did a decent job in showing that some of the situations were…‘fluid’, for lack of a better word. The sexual assaults were definite, but there were a few things–such as the note she wrote to the one basketball star that she thought she saw him throw away, and it turned out he hadn’t (he showed it to Clay after Hannah had died). And while the school counselor should have handled her telling him of the rape a bit differently (encouraging her to see a doctor and a rape crisis counselor and offering to bring in her parents), he did have a point when he told her that if she wasn’t willing to name her assailant, then he was in a bit of a bind on that.

But the overall point was from Hannah’s POV, once things started to go downhill, she was filtering everything through a depressive viewpoint. No matter what the situation was, she felt it was one more thing piling up on her (even if the truth was it was neutral, or she wasn’t seeing everything accurately.) I thought the show did a good job of showing how isolated/lonely in a crowd she was feeling.

I didn’t feel the suicide scene was glorified either–they showed Hannah suffering and in (physical) pain before she lost consciousness. (I flinched hard when she used the razor.)

And I felt the reaction of the other students was pretty accurate. Some were sorry (whether genuinely sorry for Hannah or more sorry for how it might come back on them is a sliding scale from character to character–Clay, 100% sorry for Hannah; Tony, probably high up there in feeling sorry for her, but with some guilt mixed in that he’d avoided her because he was tired of ‘her drama’; the aforementioned basketball player, probably a mix of genuinely sorry for Hannah and somewhat sorry for himself for his part in the bullying; Courtney and Marcus, completely sorry for themselves in regards to how it was going to come back to bite them for their part in the bullying), some felt she’d done it for attention, and some plain old didn’t care one way or the other.

I honestly thought it was an intriguing story. I agree the tapes probably wouldn’t have been done, but it was a way to present Hannah’s POV, even though she was already dead.

 

[exnihilo]

I haven’t watched it and I doubt I will. I’m trying not to watch things that have a dark subject matter. I’m also trying to avoid things which insist on ‘realism’. I think there has been too much presentation of ‘gritty reality’. I’m not sure it is good for us and don’t think it is even all that real.

 

[TheAmazingGrace]

Surprisingly enough, the person/writer who pushed for that scene was someone who attempted suicide in his bathroom (the same way Hannah killed herself in the original story) . He remembered a really graphic description of a woman he knew who attempted suicide. He said he remembered it vividly and he immediately purged and got help. He said that people need to be very open about suicide.

I don’t agree with showing suicidal people graphic scenes though. He may be lucky that it helped, but it could simply trigger others. I didn’t mind the scene because I feel like it showed suicide is horrifying, not a decision a drama queen made because of some angst/for attention or whatever. However, this is an unpopular opinion and that’s fine.

I know someone who used to struggle with suicidal ideations and cutting, and she said that if she had watched that scene as a teenager, she would probably have attempted something similar to what Hannah did.

Someone once said that there are no true anti-war movies, because they all paint war as an exciting event that you become a hero for participating in. In a similar vein, I would say that there are no true anti-suicide films, because in the end, they all still portray suicide as a way out (Virgin Suicides is the closest thing to an exception I can think of).

 

[Midwest88]

I’m currently in the process of becoming a school social worker, focusing on high school, and I think this would be a good series for me to watch given what is being said about it. It seems like it has good intentions but the execution (no pun) was well off - says mental health specialists and those who are familiar with depression.

 

[Lea101]

I know someone who used to struggle with suicidal ideations and cutting, and she said that if she had watched that scene as a teenager, she would probably have attempted something similar to what Hannah did.

Someone once said that there are no true anti-war movies, because they all paint war as an exciting event that you become a hero for participating in. In a similar vein, I would say that there are no true anti-suicide films, because in the end, they all still portray suicide as a way out (Virgin Suicides is the closest thing to an exception I can think of).

True. If I watched it a few years ago, I would probably be having intensive therapy sessions right now!

Reminds me of anorexics who find recovery stories triggering because they use that as inspiration to strive towards being as sick as the other person. Anything that is about food will mess them up.

However I don’t think media should be censored (if anyone is confused, the show had a graphic scene of Hannah slitting her wrists) to pander to people’s needs. The trigger warnings at the start of the episode should be enough imo. If the person chooses to ignore that and then gets, well, triggered, it’s their mistake for overestimating themselves. Sounds harsh but it’s important to have self responsibility in recovery. I could be defending this way too much, lol. I just liked how someone called her a drama queen that did it for attention, and then we see her last moments and we know that she was clearly in great pain for her to do that to herself. Am I weird?

That being said, I’m assuming this show was marketed towards the general public (where the majority are stable enough and is rather ignorant about rape and suicide) not as some “savior” for those with illnesses (because the whole message was to be nice/don’t bully, not to go see a therapist). If it’s the latter the show is trash!

 

[KevinAK]

Surprisingly enough, the person/writer who pushed for that scene was someone who attempted suicide in his bathroom (the same way Hannah killed herself in the original story) . He remembered a really graphic description of a woman he knew who attempted suicide. He said he remembered it vividly and he immediately purged and got help. He said that people need to be very open about suicide.

I don’t agree with showing suicidal people graphic scenes though. He may be lucky that it helped, but it could simply trigger others. I didn’t mind the scene because I feel like it showed suicide is horrifying, not a decision a drama queen made because of some angst/for attention or whatever. However, this is an unpopular opinion and that’s fine.

I finished the book recently and the suicide is nowhere near as graphic as it in the series. Hannah OD’s on pills in the novel.

 

[Viki63]

That being said, I’m assuming this show was marketed towards the general public (where the majority are stable enough and is rather ignorant about rape and suicide) not as some “savior” for those with illnesses (because the whole message was to be nice/don’t bully, not to go see a therapist). If it’s the latter the show is trash!

I don’t plan to watch it, and think it’s irresponsible of Netflix to produce this, considering the high percentage of teen suicides in this country, and that it’s being marketed to teens.

I do think media should be censored to “pander” to people’s needs. You can find snuff films I’m sure, too, but they should not be made.

.

 

[KevinAK]

I don’t plan to watch it, and think it’s irresponsible of Netflix to produce this, considering the high percentage of teen suicides in this country, and that it’s being marketed to teens.

I do think media should be censored to “pander” to people’s needs. You can find snuff films I’m sure, too, but they should not be made.

.

I think this was produced by Paramount and Netflix just broadcast it – maybe no one else wanted it.