This may sound gross, but I was wondering

[Benjamin89]

This may sound gross, but what if someone noticed someone that they don’t want anything to do with in a sexual way. What should they do. Should they ask God to give them chastity and purity and move on. What if this someone was somthing like an adult or a teacher.

 

[Catherine_Grant]

Moved to Moral Theology as it is an ethical dilemma.

 

[Benjamin89]

Let me reword what I typed to avoid confusion:
This may sound gross, but what if someone noticed someone in a sexual way that they don’t want anything to do with. What should they do? Should they ask God to give them chastity and purity and move on? What if this someone was somthing like an adult or a teacher?

 

[the-3rd-parent]

I’m sorry I don’t see how your second wording was any different than what you had typed before.

I will say this much. Chastity is a virtue and its something you need to help to cultivate. Its not enough to only be concerned about situations where you’re lust bursts out toward an individual you don’t want to commit to, shouldn’t or etc.

 

[Princess_Abby]

Are you talking about a young student being sexually attracted to a teacher who is presumably much older then them?

 

[matthias]

Yah, your question is worded in a confusing way. I’m not sure what you are asking…

 

[trumpet152]

I think we should pin down the question before giving an answer. Your question is asking what one should do when he is sexually attracted to someone he shouldn’t be? Like a teacher?

 

[Benjamin89]

Yes. My question is what should one do when he or she is sexually attracted to someone he shouldn’t be.

 

[Benjamin89]

Listen, I don’t want to sound wierd like I am attracted to someone I shouldn’t be, but I do want an answer to this question.

 

[Grace_and_Glory]

Benjamin89:

Should they ask God to give them chastity and purity and move on.

This sounds like a good response to the situation to me. Also, avoid the near occasion of sin. If it is a teacher, for example, don’t stay after class just to talk (although if they genuninely needed help on homework it might be a different matter). If they avoid dwelling on the feelings and do not encourage them, the feelings will eventually go away.

 

[trumpet152]

Benjamin89:

Yes. My question is what should one do when he or she is sexually attracted to someone he shouldn’t be.

One should pray. Let’s be serious. Sexual attraction is many times something you can’t control. And let’s be honest, it’s not a sin. If the person in question is a male, than this will be an issue all through life. Pray for grace.

 

[BlindSheep]

I went through this last semester myself, I was attracted to one of my professors. Even thinking about the person in an inappropriate way is sinful if you do it on purpose - the person who is tempted needs to redirect their thoughts (tell him/herself "don’t even think about it!) any time they wander in a sexual direction. If they find it too hard to control their thoughts, it might be a good idea to avoid the near occasion of sin by transferring to another class if possible (I guess not, if you aren’t in college yet!).
I don’t think it’s particularly weird or unusual, though. I think most people are attracted to someone they shouldn’t be at times. That’s why the widespread idea in our culture today that we should act (at least in fantasy) on all our sexual feelings is so destructive.

 

[wcknight]

Being attracted to a member of the opposite sex is perfectly natural. That is the mechanism that God gave us so we could perpetuate our species.

However, as human beings we can and should control our desires to focus on our own spouses (if we are married) or on legitimate singles of the opposite sex (if we are not). If the object of our desires is inappropriate - married, too old, too young etc then we need to divert our attention elsewhere. Prayer, finding another partner or talking to friends can all help to keep us out of trouble.

It’s a bit tougher when you are young and the hormones are almost uncontrollable, but it is very possible and essential that you do everything possible to control your desires. Part of growing up and maturity is to recognize and give up your more baser instincts. It also helps to stay away from those situations where you may be more tempted.