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Pansy
Guest
Just need opinions on whether to give my 8 yo daughter an allowance or not and should it be tied to chores or not.
Thanks for any opinions,
Pansy
Thanks for any opinions,
Pansy
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SeekerJen
Guest
I think a small allowance (tied to chores) is a good idea. One, it gets them used to the idea that they need to work for things, money won’t just be handed to them. Two, it can be used to teach them simple budgeting- if they want a treat, tell them they’ll need to buy it with their allowance, and then help them figure out how long it will take to save up the money (added bonus- practical math).
Too many kids don’t have the faintest idea of how to handle or budget money. I don’t think 8 years old is too young to start those lessons.
When she’s in high school and old enough to have a job, teach her about bank accounts and how to write a check, and how credit cards aren’t free money (again, things that too many kids don’t hear).
Too many kids don’t have the faintest idea of how to handle or budget money. I don’t think 8 years old is too young to start those lessons.
When she’s in high school and old enough to have a job, teach her about bank accounts and how to write a check, and how credit cards aren’t free money (again, things that too many kids don’t hear).
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Almeria
Guest
I plan on giving my children an allowance. I think it should be tied to chores, at least to a certain extent. I don’t want my kids to think that they are going to be getting money for doing nothing, so I want it to be clear that doing chores are mandatory to getting an allowance. I’ve been wondering about having a “chore price list”, where different chores have different amounts that they can earn. I just need to figure out a way to make it as fair as possible. I also want to have savings accounts for the kids, where they can put their allowance in the bank, and also encourage them to tithe from the first time they start receiving an allowance.
Idealistic goals, probably. I’ll let you know how it turns out once I have kids.
Idealistic goals, probably. I’ll let you know how it turns out once I have kids.
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theMutant
Guest
Yes, and, yes. However, I wouldn’t term the allowance as payment for the chores. When we started giving our daughter an allowance, we explained it was her share of the family funds for participating in the family responsibilities. (The fact that my wife and I each get our own allowance helped to enforce this). As parents, we decided on what chores she had (dishes, vacuuming, cleaning her room) and told her that if she wanted her allowance, she had to take on the responsibility of doing those things which meet the needs of the family.
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Chris_Jacobsen
Guest
An allowance should not be tied to doing chores.
As member of a household, the child already has an obligation to do chores. The child must do chores whether the child gets an allowance or not.
As member of a household, the child already has an obligation to do chores. The child must do chores whether the child gets an allowance or not.
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Bruised_Reed
Guest
Chris Jacobsen:
I like the way Greg and Lisa Popcak approach this in their book Parenting with Grace. Parents giving an allowance is a way of modeling generosity. In turn the child is expected to be generous as well, by giving to the church or buying a small gift with their own money. I also like that it creates more of an opportunity to teach stewardship instead of creating an attitude of “if I do this, what will you give me.”
I second this. An allowance is a share of something. If it is tied to chores then it is a wage or salary.
I like the way Greg and Lisa Popcak approach this in their book Parenting with Grace. Parents giving an allowance is a way of modeling generosity. In turn the child is expected to be generous as well, by giving to the church or buying a small gift with their own money. I also like that it creates more of an opportunity to teach stewardship instead of creating an attitude of “if I do this, what will you give me.”
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puzzleannie
Guest
allowance yes, proportionate to age and what you expect her to pay for herself each week, insist first on a tithe for church and God’s people to go in a jar or envelope, then a set amount for savings for something she wants in a piggy bank. then the rest is hers to spend as she wishes. that is a tool to learn money-management, delayed gratification, stewardship, and the ephemeral nature of momentary pleasures bought with money.
tied to chores -NO - chores are what every family member contributes to the comfort of the home and the people in it, they should never be tied to a financial reward, which then reduces family members to economic units.
if the child wants to earn money above allowance, especially for altruistic purpose like gift-giving or school fundraiser, then you could pay for out-of-the-ordinary jobs, but never for the weekly or daily household and yard chores.
tied to chores -NO - chores are what every family member contributes to the comfort of the home and the people in it, they should never be tied to a financial reward, which then reduces family members to economic units.
if the child wants to earn money above allowance, especially for altruistic purpose like gift-giving or school fundraiser, then you could pay for out-of-the-ordinary jobs, but never for the weekly or daily household and yard chores.
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jess7396
Guest
Allowance- YES!
Wether to tie it to chores or not- I waver on this. I can see both sides so clearly- on the one hand- you don’t want your kids to think they’ll get money for just being around, OTOH- you don’t want your kids to think their household chores are negotiable.
I am planning to start an allowance with my 4.5 yo and 3 yo. when my dh gets his next paycheck (just started a new job). I intend to give one dollar per year of age, and I will have 4 piggy banks to split it into- one for charity, one for long term savings (to a kid long term saving would be saving for a $10 toy, or to buy a gift), one for spending (candy or small toy, or again for gifts) and one for college savings.
At this point I am not going to tie it to chores, mainly b/c my kids now happily do chores for nothing, and I would hate to see it change from that to, “what do I get for doing it?”, yk?
I think an allowance is soooo important, I want to teach my kids good money management, and know that I have done all I can to keep them from getting into debt as adults.
Wether to tie it to chores or not- I waver on this. I can see both sides so clearly- on the one hand- you don’t want your kids to think they’ll get money for just being around, OTOH- you don’t want your kids to think their household chores are negotiable.
I am planning to start an allowance with my 4.5 yo and 3 yo. when my dh gets his next paycheck (just started a new job). I intend to give one dollar per year of age, and I will have 4 piggy banks to split it into- one for charity, one for long term savings (to a kid long term saving would be saving for a $10 toy, or to buy a gift), one for spending (candy or small toy, or again for gifts) and one for college savings.
At this point I am not going to tie it to chores, mainly b/c my kids now happily do chores for nothing, and I would hate to see it change from that to, “what do I get for doing it?”, yk?
I think an allowance is soooo important, I want to teach my kids good money management, and know that I have done all I can to keep them from getting into debt as adults.
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dhgray
Guest
Chris Jacobsen:
Work = money
NO WORK = NO MONEY!
I disagree. Allowance should be tied to chores. DO you get paid for doing nothing? Teach the children a work ethic early.
Work = money
NO WORK = NO MONEY!
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puzzleannie
Guest
that thinking is exactly why I would not want to equate allowance with chores. do I get paid for doing nothing? how about, do I do a lot around here without getting paid? does mom get paid for cooking, cleaning, laundry etc.? does dad get paid when he cuts the grass and washes the car? then why should kids get paid for taking part in normal family life and caring for home and family?
work=money means a j.o.b. and there are not a lot of people hiring 8-yr-olds where I live. Family life and responsibilities are not a j.o.b.
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Sweetcakes
Guest
It it’s tied to doing chores, it’s a wage. If you give it to her for pocket money, it’s an allowance.
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Galieo
Guest
I agree 100%–by definition an allowance is not contingent upon the performance of various duties. For those of you who advocate paying family members for performing family duties, what about withholding Federal, state income taxes and FICA?
yes, I know I have taken this to a ridiculous conclusion, but work for compensation is technically wages and potentially subject to withholding. What lesson do we teach children when we flout the law?
Okay, back to reality, chores are non-negotiable tasks we all do to contribute to the well-being of the household. Allowances serve a different purpose, that is, to educate children on the use of money, how to budget, fiscal responsibility, etc.
One thought might be providing children a baseline allowance, but providing additional “Special” tasks outside the realm of chores for which the child(ren) could earn extra money? My father often had us bid on jobs, a very educational process.
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mommi2four
Guest
i have an 8 year old. I don’t give him allowance or money for that matter. he does chores because he is part of the family and we are a family of 6.
i just don’t think my son is ready to handle money. I can’t even trust him with token when we go to Chuck E. Cheeses because he tends to be “con” by other kids. and those are just tokens.
i just don’t think my son is ready to handle money. I can’t even trust him with token when we go to Chuck E. Cheeses because he tends to be “con” by other kids. and those are just tokens.
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Fitz
Guest
I don’t give an allowance, and I do expect certain chores done. However I pay for the extra chores like: washing my car, raking leaves, mowing the lawn. I don’t think there is one right way to do it as long as you are consistant. However, keep in mind that some chores are the normal expectation for a person living in a group. When my kids went off to college they were so upset when some of their friends did not feel like they needed to contribute to the shared living experience.
One thing I have learned raising my children. When they did have a way to earn some money and I then held them responsible for buying certain items, it was a real good learning situation. They are mostly grown and are very responsible for money.
One thing I have learned raising my children. When they did have a way to earn some money and I then held them responsible for buying certain items, it was a real good learning situation. They are mostly grown and are very responsible for money.
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Seatuck
Guest
We give our children allowance. It is not directly tied to chores.My children are members of a family which does many things for them. Chores are the main way for them to honor my husband and I as well as the family. We give allowance it to model generosity and to teach the proper use of money. Our gift of allowance comes with rules. The children must tithe as we do, they must show long term savings and short term savings . When they want to spend money we have a little chat about why they want to spend that money and what the they want to spend the money on.We talk afterward to see if they think the money was well spent. This way they learn to make better choices or to reinforce the spending habits they have learned.
Our rule for how much allowance is half the age of the child until teens then they get their age. We distribute allowance every two weeks on payday.
Decide in advance what things your child may now be monetarily responsible for so that the rules are clear. For instance Birthday party gifts or later on school dances. That way the child learns to save up for things they want to be able to do. We have spending limits on some things such as clothes. So we have had agreements with our children if they want sneakers or something that cost more than what I could spend then they have to come up with the difference.
I have a 19 yr old in college.I really see the fruits of this way of doing things in him. He worked last summer. He put aside money for the school year, he put aside money for a car and he put aside his tithe money for the church. Pretty much without assistance from me except help with how to set up his bank accounts to accomplish this. He recently suggested that we give him money instead of purchasing the college food plan because he kept a log of how many meals he ate at campus and multiplied that by the typical cost of a meal and saw that we were actually losing money.
I see the allowance as an opportunity to teach life long monetary christian stewardship habits.
Hope that helps.
Our rule for how much allowance is half the age of the child until teens then they get their age. We distribute allowance every two weeks on payday.
Decide in advance what things your child may now be monetarily responsible for so that the rules are clear. For instance Birthday party gifts or later on school dances. That way the child learns to save up for things they want to be able to do. We have spending limits on some things such as clothes. So we have had agreements with our children if they want sneakers or something that cost more than what I could spend then they have to come up with the difference.
I have a 19 yr old in college.I really see the fruits of this way of doing things in him. He worked last summer. He put aside money for the school year, he put aside money for a car and he put aside his tithe money for the church. Pretty much without assistance from me except help with how to set up his bank accounts to accomplish this. He recently suggested that we give him money instead of purchasing the college food plan because he kept a log of how many meals he ate at campus and multiplied that by the typical cost of a meal and saw that we were actually losing money.
I see the allowance as an opportunity to teach life long monetary christian stewardship habits.
Hope that helps.
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Seatuck
Guest
I forgot to add that I reserve the right to stop allowance if child is not living up to rules regarding allowance or family participation. In that way allowance is connected to chores only if chores are consistently not done out of disobedience or struggle with my or my husbands authority in the house.Also I would withould allowance if other house rules are disobeyed.
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kage_ar
Guest
Teaching financial responsibility is something I do for my child, both for his benefit and for the benefit of his future employer (I have managed people for a few years now, and it is appalling how many young people think that businesses exist for the sole purpose of providing them a wage, that those wages should never be tied to performance –– but, that is another soap box).
We tie extra money to extra chores as well as to grades. Right now, school is my son’s primary job. Excelling at that job has benefits, if grades drop below a B anywhere on the report card, football is over. Bring home an A, and you get an extra amount of money. Bring home all A’s and there is a payoff. Bring home a low grade, and I take money out of the pot. Performance is tied to reward in our house.
While with only one child the concept of family taxes does not balance as well, I know people who require the children to pay taxes back to the government – to the family, this money goes in a fund and the family votes on the way it is spent. This is in addition to the charity – long term – short-term savings plan for kids.
I also think that it is important to teach teens how to manage a checking account – when I married my husband, he had never written a check in his life!
We tie extra money to extra chores as well as to grades. Right now, school is my son’s primary job. Excelling at that job has benefits, if grades drop below a B anywhere on the report card, football is over. Bring home an A, and you get an extra amount of money. Bring home all A’s and there is a payoff. Bring home a low grade, and I take money out of the pot. Performance is tied to reward in our house.
While with only one child the concept of family taxes does not balance as well, I know people who require the children to pay taxes back to the government – to the family, this money goes in a fund and the family votes on the way it is spent. This is in addition to the charity – long term – short-term savings plan for kids.
I also think that it is important to teach teens how to manage a checking account – when I married my husband, he had never written a check in his life!
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