Topic of Divorce - what does this scripture mean?

[Serap]

Matthew 19:3-9 Some Pharisees came to him to test him. They asked, “Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any and every reason?”
“Haven’t you read,” he replied, “that at the beginning the Creator ‘made them male and female, and said, ‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh’? So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.”

“Why then,” they asked, “did Moses command that a man give his wife a certificate of divorce and send her away?”

Jesus replied, “Moses permitted you to divorce your wives because your hearts were hard. But it was not this way from the beginning. I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another woman commits adultery.”

What did Jesus mean by “except for sexual immorality”? Did he mean that it’s ok to divorce and re-marry if you were cheated on? I don’t get it 100%.

 

[JRPO]

Matthew 19:3-9 Some Pharisees came to him to test him. They asked, “Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any and every reason?”
“Haven’t you read,” he replied, “that at the beginning the Creator ‘made them male and female, and said, ‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh’? So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.”

“Why then,” they asked, “did Moses command that a man give his wife a certificate of divorce and send her away?”

Jesus replied, “Moses permitted you to divorce your wives because your hearts were hard. But it was not this way from the beginning. I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another woman commits adultery.”

What did Jesus mean by “except for sexual immorality”? Did he mean that it’s ok to divorce and re-marry if you were cheated on? I don’t get it 100%.

I went to Catholic Bible Online and Matthew chapter 19 verse 9 reads like this -
Now I say this to you: anyone who divorces his wife – I am not speaking of an illicit marriage – and marries another, is guilty of adultery.

I wonder what the original direct translation is of this bible passage?

 

[Mary_Gail_36]

usccb.org/nab/bible/matthew/matthew19.htm

defendingthebride.com/sc/marriage.html

I’m not an exepert but here are 2 things I found… I remember reading Christopher West explain it…it might be in the book “Good News about Sex and Marriage” I don’t remember.

 

[Dave_B]

What did Jesus mean by “except for sexual immorality”? Did he mean that it’s ok to divorce and re-marry if you were cheated on? I don’t get it 100%.

Yes, I’d interpret this verse this way. I dont think any reasonable person would expect someone to remain in an unhappy marriage where the other person was cheating. But then I guess you’d need to define what was meant by cheating. God bless

 

[thevoiceofone]

Yes, I’d interpret this verse this way. I dont think any reasonable person would expect someone to remain in an unhappy marriage where the other person was cheating. But then I guess you’d need to define what was meant by cheating. God bless

On a human level, I can agree with your point, mostly. But, happiness is a feeling, and feelings change… peaks and valleys and all that sort of thing. But, marriage is a covenant. God made a covenant with us, His children, and we cheat on Him every day in some way or another (some worse than others, surely), but He has not left us. Of course, He is infinitely better than we are, but we are to strive to follow Him as best we can. Ideally, the right course of action for the spouse who has been cheated is forgiveness. That is very hard, of course. We are weak and full of pride, and the way we love is never as unconditional as we like to think it is.

All that said, my personal interpretation leads me to believe that Jesus *is *offering an exception that would allow for a lawful divorce between a man and a woman under such a condition defined as unchastity (the RSV reads, “…except for unchastity…” in that part of verse 9). I don’t know what the official teaching of the Church is about this, but I will accept whatever that is if anyone here is able to lay that law down for us.

But, even if it is allowed, I think it’s important to remember the point Jesus makes in verse 8: “For your hardness of heart Moses allowed you to divorce your wives, but from the beginning it was not so.” Apparently, the Lord does not *approve *of divorce, even if it may be *allowed *under a certain condition.

 

[Lancer]

On a human level, I can agree with your point, mostly. But, happiness is a feeling, and feelings change… peaks and valleys and all that sort of thing. But, marriage is a covenant. God made a covenant with us, His children, and we cheat on Him every day in some way or another (some worse than others, surely), but He has not left us. Of course, He is infinitely better than we are, but we are to strive to follow Him as best we can. Ideally, the right course of action for the spouse who has been cheated is forgiveness. That is very hard, of course. We are weak and full of pride, and the way we love is never as unconditional as we like to think it is.

All that said,** my personal interpretation** **leads me to believe that Jesus *is ***offering an exception that would allow for a lawful divorce between a man and a woman under such a condition defined as unchastity (the RSV reads, “…except for unchastity…” in that part of verse 9). I don’t know what the official teaching of the Church is about this, but I will accept whatever that is if anyone here is able to lay that law down for us.

But, even if it is allowed, I think it’s important to remember the point Jesus makes in verse 8: “For your hardness of heart Moses allowed you to divorce your wives, but from the beginning it was not so.” Apparently, the Lord does not *approve *of divorce, even if it may be *allowed *under a certain condition.

Actually the Church has ruled with Magisterial authority doctrine on the issue/interpretation of…Jesus’ teaching on marriage and divorce.

Catechism:
Divorce
2382 The Lord Jesus insisted on the original intention of the Creator who willed that marriage be indissoluble.174 [Cf****. Mt** 5:31-32; 19:3-9; Mk 10:9; Lk 16:18; 1 Cor 7:10-ll.]
He abrogates the accommodations that had slipped into the old Law**.175 ***[Cf. Mt 19:7-9.]

Between the baptized, "a ratified and consummated marriage cannot be dissolved by any human power or for any reason other than death."176

2383 The** separation of spouses while maintaining the marriage bond can be legitimate in certain cases provided for by canon law.177 If civil divorce remains the only possible way of ensuring certain legal rights, the care of the children, or the protection of inheritance, it can be tolerated and does not constitute a moral offense

**2384 Divorce is a grave offense against the natural law. It claims to break the contract, to which the spouses freely consented, to live with each other till death. Divorce does injury to the covenant of salvation, of which sacramental marriage is the sign. Contracting a new union, even if it is recognized by civil law, **adds to the gravity of the rupture: the remarried spouse is then in a situation of public and permanent adultery: **

If a husband, separated from his wife, approaches another woman, he is an adulterer because he makes that woman commit adultery, and the woman who lives with him is an adulteress, because she has drawn another’s husband to herself.

So divorce is not an option under any circumstances…and several of the Church Fathers view the “…except for unchastity…” clause…as Jesus allowing for “civil” divorce for serious sexual sin plus in today’s language…for the protection – corporal & temporal – of the spouse/children ]…but not a breaking of the sacramental marriage bond…in other words…no other marriage may be entered into…the original sacramental marriage bond is still valid.

The other intrepretation…for the “…except for unchastity…” clause…is that there was an impediment to the sacramental marriag…so no marriage actually took place…in other words…a decree of nullity has been declared. Based on the Greek word used for “unchastity”…porneia has a broad range of meaning…unchastity…adultery…harlotry.

These last two thoughts/ideas/proposals are my partial para-phrasings from:
Ignatius Catholic Study Bible New Testament RSV 2nd Edition (PG. 41).

Lastly, I believe that is always important for me to remind myself that it is Jesus teaching us through his visible Vicar Peter/Pope & Bishops/Magisterium…this interpretation by the Church is from Jesus himself:

Matthew 16: 17-19 (NAB)
17 Jesus said to him in reply, “Blessed are you, Simon son of Jonah. For flesh and blood has not revealed this to you, but my heavenly Father. 18 And so I say to you, you are Peter, and upon this rock I will build my church, and the gates of the netherworld shall not prevail against it. 19 I will give you the keys to the kingdom of heaven. **Whatever you bind on earth shall be bound in heaven; and whatever you loose on earth shall be loosed in heaven.” **

Matthew 28:18-20 (NAB)
18 Then Jesus approached and said to them, “All power in heaven and on earth has been given to me. 19 Go, therefore, and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the holy Spirit, 20 teaching them to observe all that I have commanded you. And behold, I am with you always, until the end of the age.”

Pax Christi

 

[vwtaylorii]

It would seems Jesus would allow divorce and re-marriage. However, Jesus never said anything about re-marrying. 1 Cor 7: 10-11 makes a clearer explanation, which says

To the married, however, I give this instruction (not I, but the Lord): a wife should not separate from her husband –and if she does separate she must either remain single or become reconciled to her husband–and a husband should not divorce his wife.

If a marriage is valid, than there should be no remarriage.

 

[Todd_Easton]

Serap,

In the beginning of Matthew’s gospel, it says that St. Joseph, a just man, contemplated divorcing his wife, the Virgin Mary, because she had been found to be pregnant before they had consumated their marriage. (Matthew 1:18-19)

I think the divorce exception clause, found only in Matthew, was included simply to vindicate St. Joseph, to show that the action he had contemplated was just. (Matthew 5:32 and 19:9; Mark 10:11 and Luke 16:18)

 

[Dave_B]

Some of the posts above seem very unforgiving regarding divorce. So what’s going to happen to divorced people, are they beyound redemption?

I was married at a registry office and divorced, before I became a Christian. I am marrying my fiancee at an anglican church. I am not a catholic.

Am I committing a sin by getting remarried? Bearing in mind I am currently living in sin.

 

[vwtaylorii]

Some of the posts above seem very unforgiving regarding divorce. So what’s going to happen to divorced people, are they beyound redemption?

Nobody is beyond redemption because God is merciful and He desires everybody to come to Heaven. What happens to divorce people is up to God because He knows people hearts. A lot of people don’t understand what marriage really means, and God would not fault them for their ignorance.

Divorce is a sin because you are breaking a contract with God. What makes it worst when a person is divorce and remarry if the other marriage is valid. People can’t bring two people together. God is the only person that can do that and does it through His ministers. Therefore, people can’t separate two people.

Marriage is a covenant relationship with God. As a result, a valid marriage cannot be broken because God does not break covenants. If the marriage was not valid, then there was no marriage in the first place.

I was married at a registry office and divorced, before I became a Christian. I am marrying my fiancee at an anglican church. I am not a catholic.

Am I committing a sin by getting remarried? Bearing in mind I am currently living in sin.

Only if the last marriage is valid. The Catholic Church believe getting married at a register office (it will be Justice of the Peace in the U.S.) will not be considered as a valid marriage (you may need to check me on that).

 

[Serap]

Some of the posts above seem very unforgiving regarding divorce. So what’s going to happen to divorced people, are they beyound redemption?

I was married at a registry office and divorced, before I became a Christian. I am marrying my fiancee at an anglican church. I am not a catholic.

Am I committing a sin by getting remarried? Bearing in mind I am currently living in sin.

you sinner!!!

Your last marriage would not have been recognized by the church b/c it was civil.

So…you were never married according to the church…

Good luck with your new marriage! I hope it’s a blissful occassion!

 

[TimothyH]

There is the literal interpretation of those passages which have been interpreted by the Church in the context of marriage and divorce, adultery and hardness of heart. But there is a deeper meaning which John Paul II taught about in his catechesis commonly referred to as the “Theology of the Body”

Some Pharisees approached him, and tested him, saying, “Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any cause whatever?” He said in reply, "Have you not read that from the beginning the Creator ‘made them male and female’ and said, ‘For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’? So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore, what God has joined together, no human being must separate." They said to him, “Then why did Moses command that the man give the woman a bill of divorce and dismiss (her)?” He said to them, "Because of the hardness of your hearts Moses allowed you to divorce your wives, but from the beginning it was not so. (Matthew 19:4-8)

Jesus is asked point-blank about divorce and the mosaic law by the pharisees. In answering their question Jesus does correctly interpret the mosaic law and teaches them a thing or two. But his answer also tells the Pharisees that he will not play their petty mosaic law test games and that he has come to give us something better than the old rules of divorce under the mosaic law.

Notice that Jesus references “In the beginning” twice. “In the beginning” are the first three words in the Bible and the Pharisees with whom Jesus was conversing would have immediately recognized the reference. Jesus is saying that he has come to take us back to a time before the mosaic law was required, to a time before sin entered the world, to a time when Adam and Eve walked naked before each other and before God without shame - to the way it was “In the beginning” when man lived a life of pure sanctifying grace without sin.

*For sin is not to have any power over you, since you are not under the law but under grace. (Romans 6:14)*Paul understood that this is what Jesus came to do. To focus on the Jesus teaching in Matthew 19 in terms of divorce and what the Church permits and does not permit today is to focus on the mosaic law of the Old Testament just like the Pharisees did. Jesus promises something better - a return to the way it was “In the beginning” and then he gives us a way to get there.

Mary Gail 36 touched on the book “Good News About Sex and Marriage” by Christopher West. Christopher West is the foremost scholar on John Paul II’s Theology of the Body catechesis and it is well worth reading his other books on the subject. I recommend “Theology of the Body for Beginners” for anyone who is interested in the topic. Theology of the Body is part of the legacy left to us by JPII and contributes greatly to why the Church is about to recognize him as a saint.

-Tim-

 

[vsedriver]

Some of the posts above seem very unforgiving regarding divorce. So what’s going to happen to divorced people, are they beyound redemption?

I was married at a registry office and divorced, before I became a Christian. I am marrying my fiancee at an anglican church. I am not a catholic.

Am I committing a sin by getting remarried? Bearing in mind I am currently living in sin.

The Catholic Church would say that your first marriage was not sacramental so therefore you can still have a sacramental marriage. But since you are not Catholic it doesn’t really matter.

If you are currently living in sin why does it matter if you add another sin?

 

[Serap]

The Catholic Church would say that your first marriage was not sacramental so therefore you can still have a sacramental marriage. But since you are not Catholic it doesn’t really matter.

If you are currently living in sin why does it matter if you add another sin?

Hey that’s not nice!

An Anglican marriage is recognized by the Catholic church as is an Anglican baptism.