Two Questions

[easter88]

I went through RCIA last year and I was received into the Church at the Easter Vigil. However, I made the Profession of Faith (I think it was the Apostles’ Creed during the Easter Vigil Mass) without any faith at all (I had been having doubts for a while) and I received the Sacraments of Confirmation and First Communion in a state of mortal sin. Since then, I gradually lost my faith and I do not participate in the Sacraments.

My first question is: am I a Catholic? A fallen-away Catholic?

My second question is that I would like to hear stories of people who lost the faith and then got it back.

 

[Stevonsky]

Hello there,
My answer (I may be wrong) but before my holy communion we had to go to confession just before to ensure our sins were absolved. Was this not the case for you?

You said you wanted to hear stories of people who lost their faith and regained it. I am proud to say I fall within that category! I lost my faith when I was 11, a lot had happened to me in the 3 years before this that I was simply not mature enough to understand. So instead of looking to my faith for strength I turned away from it in anger and since then openly attacked my religion. I always knew something was missing, I didnt feel quite right since then and it took a while to realise what it was. But to cut a long story short I am now 22 and very much back into my faith. It took a very long time, a lot of work but I can feel my faith strengthen day by day.

On a side note, a random test of this faith is our family suffered a great loss within the last 2 weeks, upon receiving this news I was not angry, I turned to my faith to help me deal with it rather then blame God for it. It takes work but the rewards are infinite!

Sorry for blabbing on but hey, its what the internet is for!

 

[JRKH]

I went through RCIA last year and I was received into the Church at the Easter Vigil. However, I made the Profession of Faith (I think it was the Apostles’ Creed during the Easter Vigil Mass) without any faith at all (I had been having doubts for a while) and I received the Sacraments of Confirmation and First Communion in a state of mortal sin. Since then, I gradually lost my faith and I do not participate in the Sacraments.

My first question is: am I a Catholic? A fallen-away Catholic?

My second question is that I would like to hear stories of people who lost the faith and then got it back.

Well - I would say that you are Catholic since no one forced you to receive the sacraments of initiation in spite of your doubts - and since you have “lost your faith” you are a fallen away Catholic. To what degree I don’t know. Have you lost faith in God?, Christ?, The Church? Would need more info…

As to my own story I drifted away from the Church in my late teens early 20’s. I was not active for over 35 years. In that time I did do some studying of different faiths, looked into protestantism and read the NT, primarily the Gospels…
I never seriously questioned Christ’s existance, death and resurection so the main issue seemed to be one of “which faith tradition”. A careful reading of the Bible brought me home to the Catholic church.

If you’d like to address specific concerns I’ll try to help, but I must confess that the “biblical basis” for my return has to do with the authority granted to The church by Christ himself and is built primarily on Mt 16:17-19, Mt 18:15-18 and Acts 15. This along with the many similarities between the RC and the EO (the ancient churches) killed any thought I had of embracing Sola Scriptura.

Peace
James

 

[easter88]

Well - I would say that you are Catholic since no one forced you to receive the sacraments of initiation in spite of your doubts -

Before the Easter Vigil, I didn’t know if I should wait another year to enter the Church or just go through with it then. The RCIA team encouraged me, but I can’t say that anyone forced me. My whole attitude was so uncertain, and in the end I just went through with it.

• and since you have “lost your faith” you are a fallen away Catholic. To what degree I don’t know. Have you lost faith in God?, Christ?, The Church? Would need more info…

I come from a Protestant family, and I became discouraged with “Sola Scriptura” early on. During my RCIA year I really believed in the Church, but after my “initiation” everything went downhill. Now I am at the point where I do not believe in God with any certainty. I have problems believing in the Church. I used to think that Catholicism was about unity in teaching and practice, etc. but there are so many differences within Catholicism – those groups leaning towards New Age, “pre-Vatican II” Catholics, things in between. I am disappointed, and I wonder if there is really authentic/correct Catholicism.

My answer (I may be wrong) but before my holy communion we had to go to confession just before to ensure our sins were absolved. Was this not the case for you?

I didn’t make a good confession before entering the Church, and haven’t since. I’m sure the people on this forum would say that that’s the problem, but I feel like I have to have faith before going to confession?

I always knew something was missing, I didnt feel quite right since then and it took a while to realise what it was. But to cut a long story short I am now 22 and very much back into my faith. It took a very long time, a lot of work but I can feel my faith strengthen day by day.

I am interested in hearing the long story!

I am at a very painful stage, just barely hanging on (still going to Sunday Mass, praying VERY occasionally) and I don’t even know why anymore.

 

[CalCatholic]

You need to make an appointment and speak to your pastor, not only can he answer some of your questions but he can can counsel you on how to proceed and hopefully get your faith back. I’ll pray for you!

 

[puzzleannie]

I went through RCIA last year and I was received into the Church at the Easter Vigil. However, I made the Profession of Faith (I think it was the Apostles’ Creed during the Easter Vigil Mass) without any faith at all (I had been having doubts for a while) and I received the Sacraments of Confirmation and First Communion in a state of mortal sin. Since then, I gradually lost my faith and I do not participate in the Sacraments.

My first question is: am I a Catholic? A fallen-away Catholic?

My second question is that I would like to hear stories of people who lost the faith and then got it back.

yes you are Catholic
the grace of these sacraments will become effective and available to you when you confess and return to the sacraments, which you are being called by the Holy Spirit to do. That is why you are here asking the question.
Welcome home.
You did not lose your faith, it is right where you left it. You merely have to pick it up again, use it and cherish it.

 

[JRKH]

Before the Easter Vigil, I didn’t know if I should wait another year to enter the Church or just go through with it then. The RCIA team encouraged me, but I can’t say that anyone forced me. My whole attitude was so uncertain, and in the end I just went through with it.

I come from a Protestant family, and I became discouraged with “Sola Scriptura” early on. During my RCIA year I really believed in the Church, but after my “initiation” everything went downhill. Now I am at the point where I do not believe in God with any certainty. I have problems believing in the Church. I used to think that Catholicism was about unity in teaching and practice, etc. but there are so many differences within Catholicism – those groups leaning towards New Age, “pre-Vatican II” Catholics, things in between. I am disappointed, and I wonder if there is really authentic/correct Catholicism.

Dear one,
I think I begin to see the problem. There does seem that some people (particulalry protestants) have this view of Catholicism as being some sort of “lockstep” monolith. Then they get confused when they discover what a messy and sometimes disfunctional family we can be. It can be a shock. But to answer your last concern above - Yes there is a really authentic/correct Catholicism. Absolutely!!
You will find it properly expressed in the NT and carefully explained in the Catechism.
Outside of this you will find many - many different forms of expression of this authentic and correct Catholicism. It ranges from the Charismatic to the deeply Mystical - from modern to very traditional. The Catholic Church even contains other “rites” primarily of the Eastern Church in communion with Rome and the new “ordinariate” for our Anglican brothers and sisters. It all makes up a rich tapestry of faith expression founded on Christ, and in communion with the Holy Father and the magisterium.
The thing to remember though in all of this is that we all remain Catholic. Where there are issues we fight it out among ourselves. This is where the big difference is between the Catholic Perspective and the Protestant one. Protestants have no mechanism for working out differences in their understanding of the bible. Each group goes their own way rather than coming together and seeking the common truth. Yet Each one is firmly convinced that their view is correct and is “bible based”…

Sorry if I got to rambling a bit there…

I didn’t make a good confession before entering the Church, and haven’t since. I’m sure the people on this forum would say that that’s the problem, but I feel like I have to have faith before going to confession?

Faith yes - perfect faith - no…As others have said, see if you can talk to your pastor and maybe get some spiritual counciling. God is definitely calling you into His Church. You just need some more time to digest all that you have been exposed to.

I am at a very painful stage, just barely hanging on (still going to Sunday Mass, praying VERY occasionally) and I don’t even know why anymore.

but yo are still knocking - still seeking -
It will be opened to you and you will be filled.

Praise God

Peace
James

 

[fhansen]

I went through RCIA last year and I was received into the Church at the Easter Vigil. However, I made the Profession of Faith (I think it was the Apostles’ Creed during the Easter Vigil Mass) without any faith at all (I had been having doubts for a while) and I received the Sacraments of Confirmation and First Communion in a state of mortal sin. Since then, I gradually lost my faith and I do not participate in the Sacraments.

My first question is: am I a Catholic? A fallen-away Catholic?

My second question is that I would like to hear stories of people who lost the faith and then got it back.

My story was somewhat different. I was raised Catholic, found I didn’t believe in the teachings-or simply didn’t know if I did- and so became agnostic. Fortunately I didn’t stop there-I really needed to know for myself if there was any purpose/hope/reason for this incredible universe with the oft-times incredibly painful existence it provides us. I looked in a variety of places for years, eastern religions mainly as well as Christian and found, much to my surprise, that the bible was the only thing that could hold my attention- a common voice seemed to speak throughout it that I sensed almost matter-of -factly knew the truth concerning questions we can’t find answers to on our own. Later I became Protestant but never quit searching/seeking/studying and was later even more surprised, after a variety of circumstances, to find myself back in the Catholic Church. If we sincerely ask, seek, and knock, we will find.

 

[easter88]

Just when I felt like giving the whole search up, I read this

the grace of these sacraments will become effective and available to you when you confess and return to the sacraments, which you are being called by the Holy Spirit to do. That is why you are here asking the question.
Welcome home.
You did not lose your faith, it is right where you left it. You merely have to pick it up again, use it and cherish it.

and this

God is definitely calling you into His Church. You just need some more time to digest all that you have been exposed to… but yo are still knocking - still seeking -
It will be opened to you and you will be filled.

It’s just taking too long. Has anyone else felt like this?

I have fallen in and out of belief in God before. My last phase of belief was in RCIA. Now I wonder: was I wrong then, or am I wrong now?

And I will just put this out there: if God is there, on this end it seems like He’s ignoring me or hiding himself. Now I know someone might say that “it’s because of the Holy Spirit that any of this is happening in the first place”, but again, it is miserable to go through this. :bighanky:

 

[JRKH]

Just when I felt like giving the whole search up, I read this

and this

It’s just taking too long. Has anyone else felt like this?

Sure - I think everyone feels like that at some time or another. It’s not unlike when you are 15 and can’t wait until your 16 so you can get a drivers license…Or when you are younger and December felt like it was about four months long…

I have fallen in and out of belief in God before. My last phase of belief was in RCIA. Now I wonder: was I wrong then, or am I wrong now?

This just shows how the Holy Spirit won’t let you alone… He keeps tapping you on the shoulder and whispering in your ear

And I will just put this out there: if God is there, on this end it seems like He’s ignoring me or hiding himself. Now I know someone might say that “it’s because of the Holy Spirit that any of this is happening in the first place”, but again, it is miserable to go through this. :bighanky:

God is not ignoring, but not pressing either. Nudging but not pushing. Be patient with yourself. Did you ever think about how parents of small children are present even when they seem far away?
Like when we use to go on a picnic. The parents would all be sitting at the picnic table yakking while we were all running around. Sure they weren’t watching us every second, but were they totally ignoring us? Nope, somebody would keep loking up, seeing where we were and what we were doing. Sometimes Dad, or Mom or Uncle somebody would come over and play with us for awhile. Other times we were on our own, but wif we wandered too far, they’d call us back.
This is what is happening to you. It’s just that you are so busy with “your stuff” that you aren’t realizing that our Heavenly Father and Mother, our Lord Jesus, and all the saints are just over at the picnic table keeping an eye on us. If they really need to intervene they will. Likewise if there is really something we need to talk over, all we need to to is go up to them and start talking. (Think of the picnic table as church maybe) So come to the table, talk things over with Dad or Mom or with Jesus. Or with that good uncle (your local pastor)

Most imprtatnly - don’t give up on those things that will build your faith and fortify wyou with God’s grace. Good confession and regular mass and communion. I’d even suggest talking to your confessor about your doubts. you can bet your boots he’s heard it all before and can offer some sound advice, maybe something to read etc…

Also, don’t hesitate to ask specific questions here (though I know sometimes these things are hard to explain). We’ll do what we can to help.

Peace
James

 

[puzzleannie]

I have fallen in and out of belief in God before.

God never falls out of love for you. This is a matter of love before, during, and after it is a matter of belief.

mature love, whether for God, or that relationship which mirrors God’s love for his people–marriage–does not “fall in and out”. That is infatuation, and infatuation with God that waxes and wanes is a characteristic of a growing but yet immature spiritual life, just as it is characteristic if immature, but growing, human love relationships.

The profession of faith is supposed to be the mature acceptance and commitment to love and fidelity, sealed by the anointing of the Holy Spirit in Confirmation, as an analogy to the marriage vows.

Just as it would be wrong to blame yourself for immaturity in other areas of life that still call for growth it would be wrong to condemn spiritual immaturity in yourself. It simply tells you in unmistakable terms, if you are honest with yourself–as you are being here–where you need to grow.

Your next best step is sacramental confession because it heals–sin, the effects of sin, doubt, self-blame, and all the barriers between you and God. It also requires humility which is the prerequisite for union with God and for growth in faith and love. At some point we must reach the humility that admits our human intellects are incapable of grasping more than crumbs of knowledge of who God is and what he does. As long as we insist that we are capable of knowing all, on his level, and will not be convinced of truth until we are equal in knowledge to him, we have not the humility that faith requires.

Pray for the virtue of humility. For lessons in love and humility turn to Our Blessed Mother.

 

[easter88]

I thank everyone who has posted on this thread.

It also requires humility which is the prerequisite for union with God and for growth in faith and love.

Puzzleannie, I have practically no humility. That might be the cause of the mess I’m in. And as for “spiritual immaturity”, I know there has been a lot of that in my journey of faith.