Uncertain about becomming a nun

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Hello. my name is Heather. I have ever since I have known thought about becomming a nun/sister. In years past I always decided that my desire to be a mother was to strong that I wanted it so badly.

But years have now past and every thing I have ever tried has been nothing but failures. Or 101 ways my life doesn’t work. But my mind always flashed back to the possiblity of becomming a nun.

And finally the other day sitting in church I made the commitment to persue this calling. And I believe its a calling because its on going since I can remember. I love the Lord and everything about Heaven and Heavenly beings and the Word and Jesus.

However I am alittle dishearted. I understood there would be some work to become a nun/sister like anything else. I mean you need to know some things I figured I would learn more regiligious things and study the bible more… and learn prayers and such.

But the more I search in to how to become a nun. The more dishearten I get. I am a Assistant Nurse. But it talks about having a Degree in something. and I really am not a school person. I mean I can learn well things I want to learn… like the bible study… I would love to do that. But going back to school is not something I wanted. I mean I don’t know if being a nurse is good enough?.. maybe it is… I am also certifide in Childcare.

I want to know why you need to be a schollar or a person who does well inschool to Love and Serve the Lord? Why do you need a 4 year degree to help someone in need? or to Praise and Pray to God. And Commit to the Lord and no one else. I mean doesn’t the Lord call to us all? Jesus himself appart from his Godlyness… was a carpenter by trade. He didn’t have to have to take algebra or biology to make tables and chairs.

And yes that was along time ago. But how much education do you need to be allowed to servise the Lord? I want to help people to… yes. and thats where my CNA and Childcare comes in. But why do you need a degree to worship God as a sister?

Isn’t it more whats in your heart and beliefs? then what you learn in school?

I also read that many places don’t allow pets and that saddens me too. Because God put animals on this earth to be our companions and if it wasn’t for my two cats. my depression/ loneliness would be far worse.

I want to give my all to the Lord… but it seems the “man” laws to do this… to become a nun/sister… is over the top… I know its not suppose to be an easy life. But why make it such a struggle?

I mean don’t we want more people comming to serve the lord? Men and Women? Don’t we want people to say I want to serve the Lord and nothng but? Then why do we as people make it so hard for new commers to join?

I mean think about it… how did the Aposels (spelling?) get chosen? Most of them where just simple fishermen. Heck one of the most famous Deciples was Mary Magdolin, which makes me assured that anyone that gives real remores and promise to change has and can follow in the service of Christ.

why should becomming a nun/sister or a brother… be almost like… until you get there… people want to push you to change your mind… its almost like saying that simple good God loving people… aren’t good enough.

I don’t understand? Isn’t everyone welcome to Gods Table? I want so much to persue this… but I need so know I am not waisting my time to just not be allowed…

I am tired of being left out and not fitting in. I never thought that the servise of God just in the few days of researching… could make me feel like I would not be good enough to serve the Lord.

Something has to be wrong with that? if anyone can help me understand or even tell me who to talk to. I’d be most grateful.

Thank you for your time and Reading my concerns.

Thank you.

Heather Harvey.
 
I believe that many orders don’t require one to have a “degree” to enter. In fact, I was looking for Dominican community and btowsed through dozens of websites, and never saw a requirement of having a “degree” 🙂 There was only one annoying thing - age limits! In the community I wanted to join most, age limit is 28… it was really crushing, because I’m already 33. And don’t feel myself to be too old to become a sister!
What about pets… it’s another question. I never imagined any monastery that would allow you to take your pets with you! Pets are probably something you need to leave behind. Fortunately I have friends who will care about my cat. After all, they have 20 cats (I’m not joking! 🙂 and these cats are living in my house now (together with their owners…) When I’d be in the monastery, these girls will most likely stay here to care about my apartment. And about cats! 🙂
When I had a dog, it was a bond that was hardest to break. I lived alone (my parents died when I was still in university, they both were very young…), and I didn’t imagine how I would leave my dog to someone else. I just knew that there is no way to take him with me, if I join the monastery. Three years ago he has died… I miss him a lot, he was true friend and great pet, but in fact, via his death, God made me free from all bonds to this secular world.
For long time, even wishing to join the monastery in the depths of my heart, I thought that I’m not worthy of such life. Not worthy to become the bride of Christ. I tried to make myself believe that my destiny is mere marriage. But something in me always resisted. And one day I just allowed myself to believe. That I have a chance. That I will be able to join a monastery. That I have a vocation. And this really renewed my life and added new sence to everything.
Just try to believe. And browse through different orders webpages, especially their vocations sections. You will see the requirements. And really not all of them require the degree, I assure you! 🙂
 
angelofwoe said:
Hello. my name is Heather. I have ever since I have known thought about becomming a nun/sister. In years past I always decided that my desire to be a mother was to strong that I wanted it so badly.

But years have now past and every thing I have ever tried has been nothing but failures. Or 101 ways my life doesn’t work. But my mind always flashed back to the possiblity of becomming a nun.

And finally the other day sitting in church I made the commitment to persue this calling. And I believe its a calling because its on going since I can remember. I love the Lord and everything about Heaven and Heavenly beings and the Word and Jesus.

However I am alittle dishearted. I understood there would be some work to become a nun/sister like anything else. I mean you need to know some things I figured I would learn more regiligious things and study the bible more… and learn prayers and such.

But the more I search in to how to become a nun. The more dishearten I get. I am a Assistant Nurse. But it talks about having a Degree in something. and I really am not a school person. I mean I can learn well things I want to learn… like the bible study… I would love to do that. But going back to school is not something I wanted. I mean I don’t know if being a nurse is good enough?.. maybe it is… I am also certifide in Childcare.

I want to know why you need to be a schollar or a person who does well inschool to Love and Serve the Lord? Why do you need a 4 year degree to help someone in need? or to Praise and Pray to God. And Commit to the Lord and no one else. I mean doesn’t the Lord call to us all? Jesus himself appart from his Godlyness… was a carpenter by trade. He didn’t have to have to take algebra or biology to make tables and chairs.

And yes that was along time ago. But how much education do you need to be allowed to servise the Lord? I want to help people to… yes. and thats where my CNA and Childcare comes in. But why do you need a degree to worship God as a sister?

Isn’t it more whats in your heart and beliefs? then what you learn in school?

I also read that many places don’t allow pets and that saddens me too. Because God put animals on this earth to be our companions and if it wasn’t for my two cats. my depression/ loneliness would be far worse.

I want to give my all to the Lord… but it seems the “man” laws to do this… to become a nun/sister… is over the top… I know its not suppose to be an easy life. But why make it such a struggle?

I mean don’t we want more people comming to serve the lord? Men and Women? Don’t we want people to say I want to serve the Lord and nothng but? Then why do we as people make it so hard for new commers to join?

I mean think about it… how did the Aposels (spelling?) get chosen? Most of them where just simple fishermen. Heck one of the most famous Deciples was Mary Magdolin, which makes me assured that anyone that gives real remores and promise to change has and can follow in the service of Christ.

why should becomming a nun/sister or a brother… be almost like… until you get there… people want to push you to change your mind… its almost like saying that simple good God loving people… aren’t good enough.

I don’t understand? Isn’t everyone welcome to Gods Table? I want so much to persue this… but I need so know I am not waisting my time to just not be allowed…

I am tired of being left out and not fitting in. I never thought that the servise of God just in the few days of researching… could make me feel like I would not be good enough to serve the Lord.

Something has to be wrong with that? if anyone can help me understand or even tell me who to talk to. I’d be most grateful.

Thank you for your time and Reading my concerns.

Thank you.

Heather Harvey.
Click to expand...
benedictinesisters.org/vocation/questions.php

My aunt is a nun here, and has been for a couple decades, and loves it. It seems like a great place. They make their own soap, Eucharist, and pottery.
 
I can understand how you feel because, I too, had considerable doubt when I was first starting out in my discernment. I am still discerning, and I still have days where I think, “I don’t want to do this. It’s too much.” It’s normal to feel this way. What is most important is that we don’t let this get in the way of achieving God’s will for us. All these doubts and fears can be a real barrier to doing anything!

I am going to give you a really good example. I don’t mean to make you sound selfish at all because you are not. I just want to help you think in a different way that will hopefully help you to understand why you are chosen, and why you CAN do this:

Take Jesus for a good example. Look at His life. For the first 30 years of His life He did nothing extraordinary except work in the carpentry trade. He lived a good life with His mother and father and was obedient to her in all ways. He loved His mother and father dearly. But, He knew He had a higher purpose, just like you. Sure, He had considerable fears, but He knew that God’s will was what was right and He did not let them hold Him back from doing what God was asking of Him. He risked everything–His family, His life, His carpentry trade, EVERYTHING, to do this one thing that God was asking of Him. He did not let His fears of losing everything get in the way of serving God, who He loved above all else.

His mother, is also a good example. She loved Jesus, her Son, with all her heart, like any mother would. She did not want to see Him suffer or die in a horrible way, but she knew in her heart that it was Jesus’ purpose. She made a great offering to God of her heart. She was not God. She was not extraordinary in any other way except she submitted to God’s will and gave everything she had in order to do what He asked of her. That is extraordinary!

It is proof that we can do this if we trust in God alone. He is not forcing you to do it. He’s not saying it will be easy, but He did say these words: “Come to me and find rest. Take my yoke upon you for my yoke is easy and my burden is light.” With Jesus, all things are possible! Of course this world will have it’s temptations and our humanly desires, in many ways, will present a challenge against our leaving the secular life. But when it all comes down to it, when we sacrifice everything for Jesus’ love and to do His will, we also gain everything and more! We gain eternal life with Him! What could be more of a reason to do it than that? 🙂

Now, about the degree requirement, not all convents/monasteries require that. In fact, in all the searching I’ve done, I’ve only seen a few that require that, and they are mostly within apostolates that require knowledge, like healthcare or teaching. What is wonderful is that you are already certified in both areas, just not with a degree.

What kind of life are you most attracted to? Cloistered or active? There’s a difference between their apostolates, and I could give you some information too. Also, do you know about the various charisms, like Carmelite, Benedictine, Dominican, Salesian, etc? Are you looking to be a teacher or a nurse, or something else? What would you like to find in an order? Are you most drawn to praying in front of the Blessed Sacrament? How many times a day do you desire to pray with the community?

You don’t have to answer the above questions now, but they are the main points in discernment. When you can answer these questions, it gives you a better idea of what God is asking of you and where you are called to. The Vision Network is a great website to begin with (vocation-network.org/)). You can take their match quiz and it will match you up with communities you might be interested in. Request their magazine too. It’s free and it has some great articles in it for people that are discerning.

Also, get a spiritual director. All this confusion you are experiencing would likely be sorted out together with you and the SD, and you can focus on the most important things. If you get a priest to help you, then it is recommended that they be your regular Confessor. Go to Mass daily if you can, walk the Stations of the Cross, do adoration, etc. These are all ways that will help you grow in your relationship with Jesus. Open your heart to Him. He knows the desires of your heart, and will not let you down.

If you need anymore information, let me know. God be with you, Heather! You are not alone! :blessyou:
 
As a serious discerner I want to say that this feeling of uncertainty is normal. The most important thing is to get a spiritual director, a wise priest who can journey with you in your discernment. Secondly, be very faithful to the sacraments, going to Mass, Confession and adoration. Thirdly, PRAY. Pray often, and regularly. YOu can’t hear what God’s trying to tell you if you don’t speak with him…
And remember, if you are called, Jesus will not fail to show you his will. So have confidence, but realize that our time is not God’s time.
Peace!:nun2:
 
My best friend is in a monastery in PA poorclarepa.org/

She was in her early 30’s when she entered and they have some dogs (though I think they were strays that showed up and not someone’s “personal” pets)

I don’t imagine that they would require a college degree.
 
acadian said:
My best friend is in a monastery in PA poorclarepa.org/

She was in her early 30’s when she entered and they have some dogs (though I think they were strays that showed up and not someone’s “personal” pets)

I don’t imagine that they would require a college degree.
Click to expand...
I was actually wondering about that one when I was curious about them. It’s a Franciscan order (so, not surprising the strays showed up! :D) and wear traditional habits.
5:30 A.M. Morning Prayer in chapel
Personal prayer time follows (with Exposition in chapel)
7:15 A.M. Daily Mass
8:00 A.M. Midmorning Prayer (and Office of Readings during the week)
8:40 A.M. Work bell rings for the morning work
11:50 A.M. Midday Prayer in chapel
Dinner and Recreation follow
Midafternoon Prayer follows dinner
2:00 - 3:25 P.M. Various work is completed
3:30 P.M. Rosary - said in chapel
4:00 - 5:00 P.M. Personal Prayer time - (with Exposition in chapel)
5:00 P.M. Evening Prayer in chapel
5:40 P.M. Collation (light supper)
Night Prayer follows collation
After Night Prayer, time for reading, praying or quiet work
12:15 A.M. (Sundays and Solemnities) Office of Readings
Click to expand...
I’m guessing they only eat 1 “major” meal around lunchtime (dinner), and a little afternoon snack (collation) - plus the 4 hours of sleep on early Monday morning. :eek: I’m guessing the collation would look something like this -

http://la_cause_des_causeuses.typepad.com/photos/herbimagier/collation.jpg?

I saw pictures of the dogs they have, and I noticed there’s a hospital nearby. Do they train them as therapy dogs/take them to the hospital?
 
angelofwoe said:
Hello. my name is Heather. I have ever since I have known thought about becomming a nun/sister. In years past I always decided that my desire to be a mother was to strong that I wanted it so badly.

But years have now past and every thing I have ever tried has been nothing but failures. Or 101 ways my life doesn’t work. But my mind always flashed back to the possiblity of becomming a nun.

And finally the other day sitting in church I made the commitment to persue this calling. And I believe its a calling because its on going since I can remember. I love the Lord and everything about Heaven and Heavenly beings and the Word and Jesus.

However I am alittle dishearted. I understood there would be some work to become a nun/sister like anything else. I mean you need to know some things I figured I would learn more regiligious things and study the bible more… and learn prayers and such.
Click to expand...
From what I’ve read, some religous orders do have religion study for their postulants/aspirants.
But the more I search in to how to become a nun. The more dishearten I get. I am a Assistant Nurse. But it talks about having a Degree in something. and I really am not a school person. I mean I can learn well things I want to learn… like the bible study… I would love to do that. But going back to school is not something I wanted. I mean I don’t know if being a nurse is good enough?.. maybe it is… I am also certifide in Childcare.
Click to expand...
I haven’t seen many orders (there’s sites where you can search for religous orders) that require a great deal of education. Since you’re a nurse, maybe you can find an order that ministers to hospitals, or the elderly. For example, there’s an order of sisters here that minister to retirement home communities.
I want to know why you need to be a schollar or a person who does well inschool to Love and Serve the Lord? Why do you need a 4 year degree to help someone in need? or to Praise and Pray to God. And Commit to the Lord and no one else. I mean doesn’t the Lord call to us all? Jesus himself appart from his Godlyness… was a carpenter by trade. He didn’t have to have to take algebra or biology to make tables and chairs.
Click to expand...
And yes that was along time ago. But how much education do you need to be allowed to servise the Lord? I want to help people to… yes. and thats where my CNA and Childcare comes in. But why do you need a degree to worship God as a sister?
Click to expand...
Isn’t it more whats in your heart and beliefs? then what you learn in school?
Click to expand...
That reminds me of a joke one of our priests made about himself when talking about two other priests in our parish. This priest only went to a seminary (didn’t have a whole lot of formal education), and the others were a lawyer and a civil engineer. One order I looked at (Poor Clares) doesn’t have that many criteria other than attraction to that way of life, being young (18-40), and in good health.
I also read that many places don’t allow pets and that saddens me too. Because God put animals on this earth to be our companions and if it wasn’t for my two cats. my depression/ loneliness would be far worse.
Click to expand...
There’s always an order like the Poor Clares, or any Franciscan type order. Now, a word of advice - I’m not sure how severe your depression is, but some convents might not accept you if your illness is too great (not sure about all convents, but I’ve seen a few like that), unless you can show that it won’t affect you in the convent.
I want to give my all to the Lord… but it seems the “man” laws to do this… to become a nun/sister… is over the top… I know its not suppose to be an easy life. But why make it such a struggle?
Click to expand...
I mean don’t we want more people comming to serve the lord? Men and Women? Don’t we want people to say I want to serve the Lord and nothng but? Then why do we as people make it so hard for new commers to join?
Click to expand...
I mean think about it… how did the Aposels (spelling?) get chosen? Most of them where just simple fishermen. Heck one of the most famous Deciples was Mary Magdolin, which makes me assured that anyone that gives real remores and promise to change has and can follow in the service of Christ.
Click to expand...
why should becomming a nun/sister or a brother… be almost like… until you get there… people want to push you to change your mind… its almost like saying that simple good God loving people… aren’t good enough.
Click to expand...
I don’t understand? Isn’t everyone welcome to Gods Table? I want so much to persue this… but I need so know I am not waisting my time to just not be allowed…
Click to expand...
I am tired of being left out and not fitting in. I never thought that the servise of God just in the few days of researching… could make me feel like I would not be good enough to serve the Lord.
Click to expand...
Something has to be wrong with that? if anyone can help me understand or even tell me who to talk to. I’d be most grateful.
Click to expand...
Thank you for your time and Reading my concerns.
Click to expand...
Thank you.
Click to expand...
Heather Harvey.
Click to expand...
One thing about discernment, being a sister or nun is a lifelong commitment. So, maybe some people might seem to be “pushing away” because it really is a huge commitment. They don’t want someone becoming a nun “on a whim”, but only when they’ve put a lot of thought into it. Don’t rush into it, but talk to your priest about it. Most convents have 1-2 or more years (sometimes as little as a few months) of “seeing how it is to live like a nun” before you make your final vows.
 
Others have already posted some good ideas… shown below.] Not all orders require 4 year degrees.
I would investigate the websites shown below, and for sure contact your vocations office for your Diocese. Also a good spiritual director will help. Above all don’t be discouraged… follow the lead of your spiritual director. If he or she tells you that you truely have a vocation to the religious life… there will be a community for you. If you truely have a calling… the websites listed below should help you to find the type of community and work you might be called to within the congregration. Good Luck… the prayers of many here will be with you!!!
Blessings Of Peace and All Good!
also: You don’t have to answer the above questions now, but they are the main points in discernment. When you can answer these questions, it gives you a better idea of what God is asking of you and where you are called to. The Vision Network is a great website to begin with (vocation-network.org/)). You can take their match quiz and it will match you up with communities you might be interested in. Request their magazine too. It’s free and it has some great articles in it for people that are discerning.
Click to expand...
kage_ar said:
Have you talked to the person in charge of Vocations in your Diocese? That might be a good start.
Some web sites…

vocation.com/
Click to expand...
Click to expand...
 
** I just wanted to say. Thank you. Thank you all for your information and words. You give great advice and I will look at the sits and do more searching.

It is also good to know that this uncerntian feeling is not odd. Its always helpful to know you are not alone.

Thank you again.**

:blessyou: :byzsoc: :harp:
 
You also might want to consider Our Lady of the Desert in northern New Mexico. They do not require a debgree as it is strictliy contemplative with no outside apostolates beyond the guesthouse. They are benedictine and wear a habit. Their Novice is in her 40s and one of the nuns has two grown kids 🙂
 
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