Uncomfortable Situation-advise needed

[Allegra]

I’ve just become a member of a new parish. I have years of experience directing children’s choirs and it has been unofficially suggested by the music director of the parish that I might take over the responsibilities of directing a Christmas children’s choir that would be open to all the children of the parish. I’m perfectly open to the suggestion, however, there is a slight difficulty. The former “Christmas children’s choir” was directed by a teacher from the day school and from what I understand, she has no interest in relinqishing the role as director.

The reason the music director would like me to take over the choir is that the day school teacher only wants to direct a choir of “her kids”. (meaning the children that attend the day school.) The parish music minister, and as I understand it the pastor as well, want the choir to be open to all the children of the parish. In the past, there was no one who was willing to do this, so the day school teacher got the gig. Now that it is out that I can direct a choir, he’s been hinting at me taking on that responsibility. I would be perfectlly happy to direct the choir or even to share responsibility, but I’m afraid it would cause contention and I’m trying to fit in to my new parish and I don’t want to be “that mean lady who took away Ms. So-and-so’s job.” What do you think I should do if I am offered the position?

 

[Joannm]

If you are offered the position by the pastor then you can assume that he would prefer you have the job than the music teacher at the school. It sound like he really wants to expand the choir and make it inclusive and that is a very good thing. If the current children’s choir director does not want to follow the pastor’s directives then it is within his rights to choose someone else who will do it. I think it is wonderful to include all the children in the parish and not just one exclusive group. If you have the talent and the desire to do this then I would accept without even thinking of what people will think of you. Once they hear what you do with the new and expanded children’s choir I think they will be overjoyed.

 

[puzzleannie]

I would simply tell the pastor and music director, that when the current children’s choir director steps down, or is fired, you would by happy to take over, but you have no wish to supplant anyone else. If the pastor does not want it done her way, it is up to him to fire her as a volunteer, not you.

 

[AntalKalnoky]

It’s Very simple. If you are offered the position, Accept it. The Pastor and Music Director will obviously tell the day scool choir director that you have been selected as the Christmas Choir Director. You need not worry about the temporary director; her policy is not liked, by Them. You have zero reason to worry. They, not you, have decided to replace. God Bless.

 

[lizziej]

I agree with the previous poster, but I certainly can understand how you feel. Obviously, the music director wants all parish kids involved, and since that choir director is not willing to include all the kids, he wants someone who is willing and able to direct all the kids, and that would be you. You can’t help it that you are what the director feels is in the best interest of your parish’s Children’s Christmas music program. That being said, though, a compromise might be that she would get to direct just her kids on one song, and you would do the rest.

 

[AntalKalnoky]

I agree with the previous poster, but I certainly can understand how you feel. Obviously, the music director wants all parish kids involved, and since that choir director is not willing to include all the kids, he wants someone who is willing and able to direct all the kids, and that would be you. You can’t help it that you are what the director feels is in the best interest of your parish’s Children’s Christmas music program. That being said, though, a compromise might be that she would get to direct just her kids on one song, and you would do the rest.

The Pastor and Music Director decide What’s Best. She is Blessed to be so Talented and already recognized. Thanks for her Concern for Our ideas.