Unitive, procreative aspects of sex

[justinmatter]

i was wondering
is the unitive aspect of sex present:

  1) only within marriage?
     That is why a man leaves his father and mother and clings to his **wife**, and the two of them become one body. (GEN,2:24)

  2) only between man and woman?
     (Or) do you not know that anyone who joins himself to a prostitute becomes one body with her? For "the two," it says, "will become one flesh."   (1 COR, 6:16)

  3) even in homosexual activity?

i was also wondering
whenever i read a catholic author on sex, they seem to mention only unitive and procreative as the aspects of sex

my question is:
where does pleasure come into all this?
1) is it a part of the unitive aspect?
2) is it a 3rd aspect of sex
3) is itonly a by product that would ideally have been done without?
i won’t give the option-is it sinful
because i think the church rejects that claim (am i right?)

thanks

 

[Dr.Colossus]

Sex is a carnal or physical union. This union occurs whenever two consenting partners engage in the act. This union occurs even outside the marriage bond. In fact, one fo the reasons that sex is sinful outside of marriage is because this union exists regardless. The act becomes a lie, because the union is meant to be permanent.

The pleasure is part of the unitive aspect, with each partner endeavoring to give the gift to one another. It is not simply a by-product that should have been “done without” or else God would not have made it so enjoyable.

 

[Scott_Lafrance]

I see the unitive and procreative aspects of sex to be two side of the same coin. The natural consequence of normal sexual activity (between a man and a woman) is procreation. The unitive aspect of sex is designed to embellish the bond of man and women to create a stable environment to raise the fruits of marriage - children. Sex between a man and a woman outside of the bonds of marriage violate the principle of unity, because if a child is conceived, it will be raised in a disordered environment. Sex between two member of the same sex is a violation of the principle of procreativity. Nothing fruitful can be born out of this union. It is a dead relationship.

 

[JamesD]

Another question:

What about state of grace?
I am thinking that the unitive aspects might be diminished in the individual who is in a state of seperation from God.
If so then the unitive nature might affect one of the partners significantly more.

Also,
The seems to be a reduction in the unitive nature the more different partners somone has had. Ex. The prostitute is not likely to experience any unitive affect.

Anyone?

 

[mercygate]

Perhaps someone here can verify an statement I read in the local newspaper about 3 years ago that scientists had identified a hormone released in women after intercourse that strengthens the sense of attachment to the partner.

 

[Ana]

JamesD:

Another question:

Also,
The seems to be a reduction in the unitive nature the more different partners somone has had. Ex. The prostitute is not likely to experience any unitive affect.

Anyone?

There is a forced denial of unity (at first) that then becomes habit. Unfortunately, it is not something that can be switched back on. Therefore, the prostitute that “cleans” up her act (it does happen), can have problems re-establishing the unitive bond with his/her spouse. There are serious repercussions by stepping out of God’s will for sexual acts … Disorder.

Incidently, according to statistics 98% of prostitutes are victims of sexual abuse. So, more often than not, their sexuality was severely damaged before they made any conscious choice to do so.

In fact, since the potential for extreme and sublime heights is awesome for a couple in union with God, it goes without saying that the potential for terror, torture and other such evils in the soul of one who has been hurt through their sexuality (especially a child whose soul is in it’s infant stages) is staggering. Thus, the usual and horrendous outcome of those who have been abused in this way … insanity, drug addiction, alcoholism, suicide, social deviants, continuing the cycle, prostitution, depression, suicide, phobias, recurring nightmares, flashbacks, body memories … I could go on forever.

There are exceptions to the rule, the grace of God is far reaching.

This is of course my opinion, based only on my experience, a few that are near and dear to me, and extensive research on the subject.

God bless!

 

[Ana]

JamesD:

What about state of grace?
I am thinking that the unitive aspects might be diminished in the individual who is in a state of seperation from God.

My guess, would be no more than the procreative aspect is. Someone outside the state of grace can bear a child. I believe someone else made the point that the fact that the unitive potential is there, is the reason why it makes it wrong … a lie.

One of the reasons why teenage couples (usually the female) have such a hard time with break ups, or staying in a bad relationship. They … ahem … “bonded.”

 

[Ana]

Dr. Colossus:

The pleasure is part of the unitive aspect, with each partner endeavoring to give the gift to one another. It is not simply a by-product that should have been “done without” or else God would not have made it so enjoyable.

Yes, also God, in His Wisdom, attaches pleasure to things we need to do to survive. For instance, sleeping (ahhhhhhh), eating (hmmmmmm). These are things we need to do to stay alive. Granted no one individual would die without sex, but collectively, if no one had sex, the human race would die. If it hurt, or wasn’t worth the effort exerted ( if you’re doing it right ), no one would do it.

God bless!

 

[justinmatter]

Sex is a carnal or physical union. This union occurs whenever two consenting partners engage in the act

does this mean even between between two members of the same sex?
i once thought homosexuality was said to be abhorrent to god in the OT because it separates the unitive and procreative aspects of sex just like contraception. is this right or is homosexuality wrong because it rejects both the unitive and procreative aspects of sex?

another question, is sex between a man and his wife always unitive? even if it is sodomy or oral sex alone?

 

[Dr.Colossus]

justinmatter:

another question, is sex between a man and his wife always unitive? even if it is sodomy or oral sex alone?

That’s the real question, and it would answer the question on homosexuality as well. Is non-coital sex unitive? I would argue that it is not, simply because it is not complementary. Both parties cannot participate equally in the act.

 

[Prometheum_x]

Biologically, sex is all about the union of the male and female gametes.

Perhaps one could include in “sex” actions that are *directly *ordered towards the successful completion of that union. There is the question of just how much can be included in that group of actions – can kissing be considered a part of sex at times, or is it something that can accompany sex and even facilitate it, thereby *indirectly *assisting in the completion of the above union? If we don’t make a distinction between things that are directly involved and those that are indirectly involved, we can include in the range of actions which constitute “sex” almost anything, which accomplishes nothing other than telling us that we need to get a new word.

If only those actions which are directly involved in the process of uniting the gametes can be considered “sex” then it is clear that homosexual practices are not sex at all.

 

[JamesD]

Ana:

In fact, since the potential for extreme and sublime heights is awesome for a couple in union with God, it goes without saying that the potential for terror, torture and other such evils in the soul of one who has been hurt through their sexuality (especially a child whose soul is in it’s infant stages) is staggering.

Actually this did not go without saying for me.
The concept of: things that have the greatest potentials can also inflict the greatest damages when profaned, actually never occurred to me before. I must give that some deep thought.

Thanks,
Jim

 

[JamesD]

justinmatter:

is sex between a man and his wife always unitive? even if it is sodomy or oral sex alone?

Ok, I am just thinking out loud but:
It seems to me that the unitive aspects might differ from the procreative ones.

You cannot have procreation without coitis.

A kiss between singles has some unitive affect.

The simple touch or a simple act of thoughtfulness can have a unitive affect upon a married couple.

Therefore it seems to me that unlike the procreative, there is a relativity to the unitive aspect.

OTOH For a marriage to be completed the act of coitis must occur. This means that coitis is not only unitive but that it is required for the life long joining of two into one flesh. So therefore in one respect it has a uniqueness that cannot be relative.

Hmmmm…