Update and thanks

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Jay417

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Hello,

I was hoping to give everyone an update and to say thank you for the support and advice.

Update: Communication is much better between us after I brought up the possibility that she was scared of me no longer being the solid, emotionless rock during bad times. She said yes, that she was hurt and afraid when I showed my emotions so plainly about her phobia. She took responsibility for not making her fears known throughout our engagement and marriage. As for me, I apologized for my emotional outburst and promised to try and be more in control in the future. I also agreed to put off actively trying for a baby until after the adoption is settled, and that if adoption works out to not try for a baby again. To my surprise she told me she wants to try again if adoption doesn’t work out, and wants to see a therapist regardless to help with her phobia.

We both took a couple of days off from work to spend time together and to help each other heal. I even surprised her at work the day before with lunch, she told me that helped her to feel valued again in light of the situation. I think we are on the path toward a stronger marriage.

Thanks again.
 
That is wonderful news! I always love hearing a happy ending, or maybe it’s a new beginning.

I hope the therapist is helpful and I honestly believe that your wife’s willingness to participate in therapy will really make a difference in the outcome.

Nice touch bringing your wife lunch, too. 👍
 
I also want to add that as posters on CAF we only get a small snapshot of your life from what you post. As with most complicated stories, more information comes out with subsequent posts.

It sounds like both you and your wife have been through a lot and I hope you don’t forget to give yourselves a chance to heal.
 
So nice to hear a good update for a change! It sounds like you are both willing to bend a little. May God bless you both and bring you success in your quest for children.
 
With positive attitudes like that and lots of hard work you guys are on your way to a happy future together! 👍
 
Good to hear Jay. I wish and pray for all the best for you and your wife.
 
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