Usually I can at least figure out when I've committed a mortal sin

[Tannhauser]

Why are we telling people that they are in sin? Does not only the Christ have such a power? Does not only God know the hearts of men and those that are in sin?

Paul advises us to judge ourselves, lest we be judged by God in 1 Cor 11:31. So why are we judging others in determining that they must be in sin?

Yes we should offer advice… but that advice should surely always, always fall short of implying that a person is in sin.

Edit: I entirely agree with what Thoughtful One has written in the previous post!

 

[William2415]

Now imagine if your friend had thought that the two of you were to meet for lunch at 11 and you thought you were to meet at 12 (which was your usual time, I might add). You arrive just as your friend is leaving. Your friend says, “Can you meet later today?” and you say, “I am so sorry, but I already have other plans this evening that would be difficult to get out of. How about next week?”

Don’t you think it would be a tad unreasonable for the friend to say “No! It has to be tonight! You must cancel your plans with your other friends to make up for getting confused about the time today or I will never speak to you again!”

Is this how you see God? No wonder you people are scared to death…

Also, note that the first source I cited had this to say:

“One may miss Mass for the sake of a pleasure trip once or twice if he has no other opportunity during the year…”

I think it’s safe to say that the Superbowl falls under this category.

Also, I don’t know what your definition of “grave” is, but mine has always been “serious”, and I think that the Catholic Church backs me up here by using the terms “grave sin” and “serious sin” interchangeably. So yes, I think postponing a Superbowl party until well AFTER the start of the game or not being there to greet your guests (one of whom doesn’t even know your roommate or anyone else at the party) is a serious inconvenience, not just to the OP, but to everyone else in attendance as well, especially since this person ALREADY tried to attend mass earlier in the day. As per canon law (above), serious inconvenience is enough to take away the obligation of attending Mass, so we have two legitimate sources stating that what the OP did was NOT sinful.

Your changing of my hypothetical only backs me up. In your new hypothetical you have the person say “I am so sorry…”. Therefore you seem to recognize the need for an apology. And what is confession but saying that we are sorry.
You also put words in my mouth. I don’t see God as getting angry and demanding that “No, it has to be tonight!”. So, no I’m not scared to death. But, when you love someone and they love you, you say things like “I’m sorry”.
Rather, I consider the gift that God gives us in the Mass - the opportunity to unite ourselves with His infinite goodness, to receive His Son in the Eucharist as being somewhat of a higher good than watching the superbowl.

 

[Thoughtfulone]

Your changing of my hypothetical only backs me up. In your new hypothetical you have the person say “I am so sorry…”. Therefore you seem to recognize the need for an apology. And what is confession but saying that we are sorry.
You also put words in my mouth. I don’t see God as getting angry and demanding that “No, it has to be tonight!”. So, no I’m not scared to death. But, when you love someone and they love you, you say things like “I’m sorry”.
Rather, I consider the gift that God gives us in the Mass - the opportunity to unite ourselves with His infinite goodness, to receive His Son in the Eucharist as being somewhat of a higher good than watching the superbowl.

I think it is clear that the OP is sorry that he was unable to attend Mass, and I also think it is clear that God knows this, that it was NOT a grave sin (or even a sin at all) and that there is NO NEED for sacramental confession here. Simply being sorry that things worked out the way they did is not indicative of sin or culpability here.

Mass is a gift, intended as you said to unite us with God. It is NOT something we have to kill ourselves to attend. God knows that OCCASIONALLY we will be unable to go to Mass, which is why there are exceptions (as noted above in both canon law and the other work by a prominent theologian that I provided). These exceptions can include serious inconvenience, special engagements (pleasure trips, vacations, etc.) and many other things that don’t require one to be on death’s door or completely incapacitated.

God is reasonable and rational and also understands our human need to be social and relax with friends and family. He created this need in us and it is a need He Himself obviously shares, which is why He created us to be with Him. The OP took reasonable measures to attend Mass. It didn’t work out.

Maybe YOU think that in this case, you would have told everyone “Too bad, party starts at half-time” and maybe you will get a shiny gold star when you get to Heaven, but the point of this thread and the answer to the OP’s question is that there was NO SIN here as elucidated by two separate, credible sources.

 

[Thoughtfulone]

Why are we telling people that they are in sin? Does not only the Christ have such a power? Does not only God know the hearts of men and those that are in sin?

Paul advises us to judge ourselves, lest we be judged by God in 1 Cor 11:31. So why are we judging others in determining that they must be in sin?

Yes we should offer advice… but that advice should surely always, always fall short of implying that a person is in sin.

Edit: I entirely agree with what Thoughtful One has written in the previous post!

 

[William2415]

I think it is clear that the OP is sorry that he was unable to attend Mass, and I also think it is clear that God knows this, that it was NOT a grave sin (or even a sin at all) and that there is NO NEED for sacramental confession here. Simply being sorry that things worked out the way they did is not indicative of sin or culpability here.

Mass is a gift, intended as you said to unite us with God. It is NOT something we have to kill ourselves to attend. God knows that OCCASIONALLY we will be unable to go to Mass, which is why there are exceptions (as noted above in both canon law and the other work by a prominent theologian that I provided). These exceptions can include serious inconvenience, special engagements (pleasure trips, vacations, etc.) and many other things that don’t require one to be on death’s door or completely incapacitated.

God is reasonable and rational and also understands our human need to be social and relax with friends and family. He created this need in us and it is a need He Himself obviously shares, which is why He created us to be with Him. The OP took reasonable measures to attend Mass. It didn’t work out.

Maybe YOU think that in this case, you would have told everyone “Too bad, party starts at half-time” and maybe you will get a shiny gold star when you get to Heaven, but the point of this thread and the answer to the OP’s question is that there was NO SIN here as elucidated by two separate, credible sources.

If you read my posts closely you will see that nowhere do I say this was a “grave” sin, nor did I determine that it was a sin at all. You seem to insist that there was no sin and assert “NO NEED” for confession. But consider what Tannhauser said,“Does not only God know the hearts of men and those that are in sin?” Why don’t you let Binary go to confession with this and let God decide if there was a sin or not? When in doubt why not let the person who may or may not have been offended be the one to decide if there was any offense.
Over the weekend someone returned to me something that I had lent them. It had extremely minor damage which was not the result of any carelessness on her part, but rather was due to poor design. I think she knew this, but nevertheless she apologized and I of course told her that is was nothing and not to worry about it. However, it was a humble and beautiful thing that she was considerate enough to let me decide if there was any offense. Might it not also be a beautiful thing to apologize to God even if there might not have been any offense and let Him decide?
Also, you say “Maybe YOU think that in this case, you would have told everyone “Too bad, party starts at half-time” and maybe you will get a shiny gold star when you get to Heaven”, let’s not be snide.

 

[Thoughtfulone]

If you read my posts closely you will see that nowhere do I say this was a “grave” sin, nor did I determine that it was a sin at all. You seem to insist that there was no sin and assert “NO NEED” for confession. But consider what Tannhauser said,“Does not only God know the hearts of men and those that are in sin?” Why don’t you let Binary go to confession with this and let God decide if there was a sin or not? When in doubt why not let the person who may or may not have been offended be the one to decide if there was any offense.
Over the weekend someone returned to me something that I had lent them. It had extremely minor damage which was not the result of any carelessness on her part, but rather was due to poor design. I think she knew this, but nevertheless she apologized and I of course told her that is was nothing and not to worry about it. However, it was a humble and beautiful thing that she was considerate enough to let me decide if there was any offense. Might it not also be a beautiful thing to apologize to God even if there might not have been any offense and let Him decide?
Also, you say “Maybe YOU think that in this case, you would have told everyone “Too bad, party starts at half-time” and maybe you will get a shiny gold star when you get to Heaven”, let’s not be snide.

Taking every little thing into confession fosters scrupulosity, which in itself can lead to the sin of despair. The general rule is that when one is in doubt, there was no mortal sin and hence, no need for confession.

The OP stated that he showed up at Mass at what he THOUGHT was the correct time, but it was already over and because of a pre-planned party, he didn’t go to a later Mass. The facts are pretty clear on this one.

Of course he is free to confess this, but that was not his question. I am so tired of so many people on this site jumping to telling everyone to run out to confession or not to take Communion where no sin exists. Some people are just scrupulous or unaware of the exact rules of the Church and just want a straight answer without having to run to a priest every 5 seconds. I gave the poster a straight and accurate answer.

 

[smichhertz]

Clearly, the OP should have made the NFL delay the Superbowl.

On a more serious note, since the party was planned around an event that the OP could not have delayed (like the Superbowl) and made an attempt to attend mass, I’m inclined to say no sin.

However, there is a big difference between “not a sin” and “virtuous”. Just because something is morally PERMISSIBLE, doesn’t mean it’s the BEST thing someone can do in a given situation.

Here are a few alternatives in the OP’s situation:

1. Check masstimes.org or ask a priest if there is a more convenient mass scheduled at a church nearby
2. Explain the situation to the pastor at the church and ask for a dispensation
3. Ask a friend to come early and act as the “stand-in” host and then go to the 530 mass, and join the party later.

Bottomline: God wills that you attend mass. If you trust in Him, He will find a way to get you to mass. Sometimes He puts us in situations like this to test to see if we will go that extra mile.

But, like I said before, I do NOT think the OP sinned in that situation. I just think it’s silly to leave it at “sin vs. not sin”.

 

[Cristiano]

Taking every little thing into confession fosters scrupulosity…

I would say that it could foster scrupulosity but it could also help in forming our conscience properly. JPII went to frequent confession and I personally doubt that he did that because of mortal sin or scrupulosity.

…The general rule is that when one is in doubt, there was no mortal sin and hence, no need for confession…

I would say that you are quite correct on this. However, the rule is general but not absolute. That means that doubts due to rationalization are probably excluded. I can always force myself in a doubt about something I did wrong by rationalizing an excuse but that does not diminish my culpability, on the contrary it increases it. Please make sure that I am not saying that in this specific case the OP is rationalizing, I truly believe that he sincerely trying to work on forming his conscience.

…Of course he is free to confess this, but that was not his question. I am so tired of so many people on this site jumping to telling everyone to run out to confession or not to take Communion where no sin exists. Some people are just scrupulous or unaware of the exact rules of the Church and just want a straight answer without having to run to a priest every 5 seconds. I gave the poster a straight and accurate answer.

There can be more graces that come from confession than the simple and wonderful gift of forgiveness. I think that you gave the poster a straight answer but not an accurate one. None of us can give an accurate one when it comes to this kind of questions. We do not really know what was in his heart at that time and how much of a true effort he made to plan for Mass that weekend. Probably he is still not fully aware of it either. However, from the OP I see a contrite person that strives for righteousness and I would not dismiss the concern of his conscience by saying that he did not do wrong.