Valid Confession

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Joe1467

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Thank you for providing a great forum!
I went to confession and had a particular sin that was really bothering me. I explained to the priest that I was “too affectionate” with my sister-in-law. I didn’t go into the graphic details and fully explain the details of how I had too much to drink and made inappropriate advances with her, touched her on her back (and other places that I would rather not go into here). He asked if I had had intercourse with her. Since I hadn’t, I told him no. Long story…short, I was absolved and given a penance.
After my confession, I still felt very guilty. It also worries me that I may not have given him enough details regarding the sin to support a valid confession. I since went back to confession to confess again and due to a long line and lack of time, the priest had to leave before I could confess again. I am not sure that it was a valid confession because the all the details were not provided as I was very nervous at the time.
Joe
 
Yes, your confession was valid. Don’t do this to yourself, or to God. When you do you are doubting the ability of God’s mercy and forgiveness. If the priest needed more information whether to offer absolution or not, he would have asked for it.

Peace and all good!
 
Joe1467 said:
Thank you for providing a great forum!
I went to confession and had a particular sin that was really bothering me. I explained to the priest that I was “too affectionate” with my sister-in-law. I didn’t go into the graphic details and fully explain the details of how I had too much to drink and made inappropriate advances with her, touched her on her back (and other places that I would rather not go into here). He asked if I had had intercourse with her. Since I hadn’t, I told him no. Long story…short, I was absolved and given a penance.
After my confession, I still felt very guilty. It also worries me that I may not have given him enough details regarding the sin to support a valid confession. I since went back to confession to confess again and due to a long line and lack of time, the priest had to leave before I could confess again. I am not sure that it was a valid confession because the all the details were not provided as I was very nervous at the time.
Joe
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The details are not what make a good confession. The integral mention of the sin is. That’s all. If Father did not ask you for further details (as he did with the intercourse question), he had all he needed to absolve or retain your sin. Since he decided to absolve you, in his judgment, he had all he needed and deemed it fitting to absolve you.

Rejoice in God’s mercy.
 
Dude, you are talking to a celibate. There is no need to make your confession a near occasion of sin for him. What you said was just right. Details would have just been hard or embarrassing for the priest.
 
Thank you all for the wise counsel! It certainly makes me feel good about my confession.
God bless you!
 
Joe1467 said:
Thank you all for the wise counsel! It certainly makes me feel good about my confession.
God bless you!
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Another thing to keep in mind: after you leave the confessional, do not go over it in your mind. Do your penance and be done with it. Reviewing it does not do you any good.
 
Joe1467 said:
Thank you all for the wise counsel! It certainly makes me feel good about my confession.
God bless you!
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Joe:

You did indeed receive wise counsel and I’m glad it has helped out.
I wanted to welcome you to the forums as well!~

Peace in Christ,
Mary.
 
Joe,

I would suggest you bring the matter up (what happened in the last confession …as well as the sins…drinking …etc) in confession. Ask the Priest what to do in that confession.

I am not saying you did not make “a valid confession” - (I was not there!)- he will be able to guide you (one can still make a valid confession - in confessing all that you thought at the moment you had to confess -even if later you realize that something else needed to be said and thus needs to be said in the next confession).

I would bring the matter up - say what you said and what it was supposed to be -and that you were nervous - ask him to direct you.

“Too affectionate” (if that is all that was said) seems rather vague…(but I was not there -nor do I hear confessions…)…now sometimes one can get to the kind in choosing less painful words - where the Priest knows what one is confessing …but we need to not be too vague. The Priest can guide you.

We need to get to the “kind” - the Priest cannot read your mind. So we need to “confess” what it was we did. And be specific enough to get to the kind.

JImmy Akin: Senior Apologist at Catholic Answers: jimmyakin.com/2007/03/specific_confes.html

One does not need to get too detailed (especially with certain sins)…but the Priest needs to know what the sins where (what the kind and number where for any mortal sin) (venial sins of course can be more vague and general).

I as I noted would bring the matter up - do anything needful and then close the case knowing it is clearly settled.

Then move on in joy and grace! Following Christ - in whom is true life.
 
I would also point out, Joe, that if you didn’t confess getting drunk, then you should do so the next time you go to Confession.
 
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